fandomhigh | Apathy Club, So Many F-Bombs In This One, Some Classroom or Other, This Can't End Well

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Apathy Club, So Many F-Bombs In This One, Some Classroom or Other, This Can't End Well

George had left yesterday's paranoia and settled straight into full-on crankiness. Puck was avoiding her. Look, she didn't think she was his fucking girlfriend or anything, it was just sex, she got that, but avoiding her!? She didn't have the fucking plague.

And maybe she just wanted to talk to him because this week was making everything confusing and going off and losing her virginity to a complete asshole hadn't helped matters any. But he'd disappeared. Asshole.

So now she had to go into the fucking club and -- what? Why was anyone still coming? What the fuck was wrong with them!?

"Why do I have to talk every week?!" George snapped, smacking her hand on one of the desks. "Why can't any of you be bothered to fucking do something, if you're going to show up? Stop coming! And if you're going to show up, then fucking act like you're here and don't just sit there like you think you're invisible! I hate this club! This whole fucking week has been total bullshit and now I have to sit here and talk to all of you people?"

She fell into her seat in a huff. "Everyone with a Y-chromosome, go fuck yourself. That's today's assignment or activity or whatever. Write an essay on why men are scum and which one you'd kill first. Or set something I fire. I don't even fucking care."

... Just another cheerful day in Apathy Club!

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Behold, the awkward shrug!

"It's what everyone says," she said. "And I just wanted to ... I don't know. To feel like I hadn't missed my chance. To feel something instead of just ... feeling alone. And now it's all weird."

Ooh. My.

//Weird in general? Weird for just you? Or...// He inclined an eyebrow just slightly.

You just tell Jono, dear, and then he would stalk off and light mean boys on fire for you.

"I'm not good at being ... close to people," George said. She felt self-conscious admitting that, out loud, but if anyone understood that, Jono would. "So then you get ... really close to someone, as close as anybody can get, and then right after that ... they're just gone. Like they never existed, like it never even happened. It's kind of ... surreal."

Had she warned Jono that she was bad at this? Interpersonal relationships? Not really her thing.

It took Jonothon a minute, but he finally managed to parse all of that.

//... Bloody hell. He walked out, didn't he?//

Yep. Definitely going to light somebody on fire.

"Well, after," she said, frowning at him. Not quite following, herself. "Isn't that just ... a guy thing? It wasn't a big ... romance deal. I didn't think he was going to ... I dunno. Cuddle?"

She tilted her head at Jono. "Did you cuddle?"

Did guys cuddle? She wasn't sure she would have wanted that, anyway. Although there had to be some middle ground, there.

Jono raised his eyebrows a little.

//Well...// Shrug. //I'm generally not th'cuddling sort, but even I'll make exceptions.//

Like, in the event of sleeping with somebody.

//Best we start from th'start, here. What happened, after?//

"I mean with this girl," George said. Jono's mystery hook-up was a much happier topic of conversation. "Was there cuddling? Is this a ... daaaaaaaaaaating thing?"

Oh, yes. She had busted out the elongated vowels, for this one.

"I don't know what you mean," she said, shrugging. "After was ... hey, I have clothes somewhere, I'll see you around, you're cool, right? That kind of thing. We weren't ... it wasn't anything serious."

//I think so?// Raven had busted out the 'L' word. And Jono had said that he really, really liked her, and neither of them seemed to be fleeing, and he'd made plans to introduce her to Joni on Saturday, too. So. //Yes? Pretty sure?//

...

And then came the squint.

//But it's eating at you.//

Edited 2010-11-13 04:57 (UTC)

"Seriously?" George said, perking up. "Do I get to meet her?"

Oh, he had to have known that was coming.

Oh, George. The master of the serious conversation derail. Not that Jonothon was complaining. But he was filing away the more serious conversation bits to be pulled out again in the future. This one wasn't over, Lass.

//Well, I don't see why not. I mean, I could invite her over sometime, or sommat...//

"Yeah," George said. "I wouldn't give her the third degree or anything. I'm just ... happy for you."

Which was a really weird sentence, to be coming from George's mouth. She usually specialized in schadenfreude.

//I think it would be difficult to give Raven th'third degree, at any rate,// Jono mused.

And then, a little more quietly, //Thank you, gel.//

"I think I met her," George said. "Kind of goth, meditates a lot?"

George had never gotten into the goth thing herself, but she had nothing against it. Goth and Grunge could kind of toast each other from other ends of the bar. And maybe invite Punk for a round.

She shrugged, for the rest. "Well, you know."

George: bad at talking about emotional things in any capacity whatsoever.

It was a very heartfelt "well, you know."

//Kind of goth,// Jono agreed, though he doubted Raven had actually had any idea what goth was before coming to Fandom.

He lifted his... chin, for lack of a better word, looking at George thoughtfully.

//Do I know, now?//

Oh, damn him anyways.

"We're ... friends," she said. Weren't they? If he said they weren't friends, she was going to smack him. "So I'm ... happy for you? Because ..."

Eloquence. She was practically a poet.

"... you've had a shitty time lately," she managed. "And it's nice that you're .... not ..... having a shitty time right now."

It was only Jonothon's better judgment keeping him from saying, "Awwwww" just then. Be thankful for that, George.

//And yet, you are?//

Yeah, he wasn't going to drop that whole 'boys can go fuck themselves' thing all that easily.

... shit. Way to walk into that one.

"I don't know," she admitted. "It's easier to be ... angry, than anything else."

//Angry about which part?//

It's okay, George. Jono was just stubborn enough to wait until conversations led to convenient openings like that one. There was no way to see that coming until you were already standing in it.

"I wish I knew," George said, shaking her head. "He's avoiding me. I think. I feel like I'm stalking him or something. I feel like ... maybe I did it just to prove I could, but it doesn't really mean anything, and maybe it doesn't count anyway. I can't really be with someone, I'm ..."

Dead? A reaper? Bad at letting people in? All of the above?

Jonothon's eyebrows went up.

//One of th'first things that Didi told me once it became apparent that we were attracted to one another was that we couldn't be together,// he noted, after a moment.

Just in case she wasn't aware.

//I'm a mortal. She's Death.//

George was, just once, not going to be the tactless person she usually was. She was going to keep her comments to herself, and not jam her foot into her mouth in an awkward and possibly painful way.

"But ... you couldn't," she said. "I mean, she's gone, right? So that's ..."

That one time was apparently not going to be today.

"... I mean ..."

At least she felt marginally bad about it?

//We had a year,// Jonothon replied, looking at George, shrugging a little. //We had one amazing year, that I wouldn't have made it through otherwise. And I don't regret a moment of it, except for closing my eyes when she left.//

He would have taken a deep breath, to steel himself, but that was just one more impossibility to add to a long list.

//Everybody leaves, sooner or later, George. Death is that one thing that we all have in common, and it'll pull people apart in the end... but while yer together, what is there to stop you but th'knowledge that it'll end? Everything ends. If you avoid happiness on those grounds, then why ever bother living in th'first place?//

"I don't think I'm supposed to," George countered. "We're here to do a job, and Rube says we should go back to the edges and not interfere. And I try, but it's lonely."

If they wanted reapers to be automatons, they shouldn't make them out of people. People had feelings. People longed to connect. It was innate. It transcended death.

//Didi wasn't supposed to, either.//

Jono shrugged a little.

//Yer here, George. And so is everybody else. Rube can blow it up his arse if he expects you to ignore that. And if he doesn't like that suggestion, point me to him, and I'll tell him about th'year that loving Death kept me from throwing myself at it.//

That was a fun mental picture. Jono taking on Rube. George ... wouldn't lay money either way, on that one.

"I thought it would help," she said. "That it would show me that I really was alive, and able to be a part of things. But I don't think it did."

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Re: Today's Topic: The Male Gender And Your Hatred For It

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