fandomhigh | Ethics [Tuesday, April 6, 2nd period]

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Ethics [Tuesday, April 6, 2nd period]

"Much of life--especially in the realm of ethics--is about balance," Anakin began, making a show of not looking concerned that the seat Leia normally filled was empty today. "For every vice there is a virtue. We have covered the seven deadly sins--" he began ticking them off on his fingers: "Lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy, and pride. We've also discussed some of the seven virtues: temperance, which balanced gluttony, and diligence, which balanced sloth."

He began pacing the room. "The key to living these virtues is restraint, which is a very Jedi concept. We've already briefly touched upon chastity in our talk of love, so that leaves us with charity, patience, kindness and humility."

None of which exactly described Anakin. "Which of those four do you have the easiest time embracing in your own life?" he asked. "And which requires work? Do you think it's worth learning restraint to live these virtues?"

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"I did," Anakin said, nodding. "Angeal, correct?"

There was a bit of a lump in Zack's throat that needed to be swallowed before he could nod again and reply.

"Angeal, yeah." ... Yeah. "He deserted a while back. Not... Not really deserted. He was trying to find a friend, who had, and things got bad, and then worse, and then he did desert but he came back and left again and there were wings and he thought he was a monster but he wasn't and, and--"

... Okay, Zack. Once more, but coherently?

"He wanted me to kill him."

Anakin blinked rapidly before scooting his own chair closer. "Did you?" he asked softly.

Breathe. Breathe. In and out. It wasn't difficult. Okay. Okay.

"I didn't want to," Zack mumbled, eyes shut tightly and arms crossed over his chest as though maybe he'd just explode if he didn't curl up a little. "He... attacked two of my friends. Threatened to go after more people if I didn't."

And Zack had still made the attempt to reason with him.

"But... But then he did become a monster. And... I mean... I had to."

Anakin reached a hand out toward Zack's shoulder, easily avoided if Zack wasn't feeling up for contact just yet.

"I'm sorry," he said softly. "I've been there, and I'm sorry."

Zack was absolutely okay with the contact. He thrived on it, really. A hand on the shoulder was just a little more proof that he wasn't alone.

He nodded a little, sitting in silence for a moment before looking up.

"What do I do now?"

"Learn how to live with it," Anakin said quietly. "Remember the good things, don't dwell on the negative. Try to get some sleep."

And another small nod while Zack hung on those words, clinging to them for all he was worth.

Live. Remember. Sleep. It was good advice.

"Thank you."

"And find someone to talk to," Anakin added. "This sort of thing will poison you from the inside if you try to shut it aside."

Zack nodded a little more, attempting a tiny smile on for size.

"Ino's been good for that," he replied. "She's been staying with me at night, outside."

"Why outside?" Anakin asked, brows furrowing.

Deep breath. Shrug.

"Angeal gave me his sword," Zack admitted. And the dorms, with their no-weapons policy, meant that he'd have to part with it, and he didn't want to break the rules, and the weather was nice anyhow...

Anakin's heart broke just a little bit for the kid.

"Oh," he said. "I'm sure that Principal Winchester might make an exception if you'd like to sleep in the cabins for a little while..."

"Or I could pay for a hotel room for a while, or there are the warehouses or whatever that don't have anything in them," Zack added, biting his lip. "I don't really... need anyone to make exceptions to the rules for my sake. I can manage."

He was stubborn. If the weather turned sour, he might consider looking for alternatives... But that would be more for Ino's sake than his own. The elements didn't tend to bother him so much.

"Oh, young one," Anakin sighed. "It would not be an inconvenience. You're not sleeping in a warehouse."

You never knew when some evil genius would show back up and need a lair, after all.

But would some evil genius mess with a kid who wielded a six-foot sword that had to weigh about the same as a small car? That would be a very silly person, indeed.

Zack twitched a hint of a smile. "Okay, maybe not the warehouses, then."

"Or up a tree," Anakin continued, eyes sparkling a little, "or in the preserve. A soldier's life is full of terrible sleeping situations. You should take the soft bed option as often as possible here."

"Did you know that there are pillow and blanket trees in Ino's garden?"

... Which sounded weird to Zack even as he said it, yes. But it was true. Still weird. "There's, like... a little nest out there, now. It's not uncomfortable at all."

They had used a lot of pillows.

"...blanket trees?"

Way to lose focus, Anakin.

"And pillow trees," Zack agreed, nodding a little.

Focus kind of took a back seat when conversation with Zack was involved.

"I guess one of the old students was from a place with stuff like that, and he gave some to Ino for her garden. Pretty useful."

And still weird.

"And odd," Anakin added uncharitably. "Useful, but..."

He pointed at Zack. "But still. We'll work on this 'sleeping outside' thing. The weapons ban has its reasons, but there's always an exception."

Like using a giant sword as a security blanket.

Zack kind of snuggled that sword at night. It was probably bad for his health, and also, he didn't care.

He nodded a bit more. Good day for nodding.

"I'm working on the sleeping outside thing, promise. I don't really want Ino to spend too many nights crashing on the lawn with me."

He could argue with her about it until he was blue in the face. But he knew better than to think he'd win.

"Good," Anakin said. "I've yelled at my grandson for spending weeks on the beach. I have no problem recycling an effective lecture."

Zack tilted his head a little at that, and for a moment, the look on his face seemed very, 'Huh, I didn't even think of the beach...'

Ben totally had all the good ideas.

"Totally noted, Master Skywalker," he said. Anyhow, he was pretty good at dealing with lectures. After all, Angeal's had been infamous among the ranks of SOLDIER.

"Good," Anakin said, cocking up an eyebrow. "This wasn't a suggestion to go live on the beach, either."

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