fandomhigh | Modeling for Dummies, Thursday 1/7/10

The classroom was empty except for Deadpool's desk. Because this was the beginning of a special journey and chairs only got in the way of it.

...look, if he was gonna be Tyra, he needed to come up with random things the kids couldn't have this time around. For funsies. And to lure in the readers. Hello readers. Are you enjoying the post so far? No? You want more introductions? You're a cruel person.

"So," Deadpool said, ignoring any slurs against those who saw this on their F-list. "Welcome to Modeling for Dummies. In this class, you'll learn the way to succeed in a high pressure situation that wouldn't happen except for on TV, with challenges that have no real bearing on obstacles in your future careers." A beat. "Unless you come from some crazy ass world. Then maybe."

He continued on, trying not to dwell on those insane worlds. Really, it was for the best that he never met Karla.

Magic cock rings.

"So, since everyone has been doing introductions everywhere before this, let's assume I don't care about your names, hopes, dreams or grade. Because that would probably be true. I don't care. But I say that with love. Instead of something that will make ya'll get with the drinking game, I want everyone to pick a classmate and make up some random crap about them that would make them an edgy model. I'll go first!" Oh yeah, this'll end well. "One time, Chuck Bass beat a hobo to death, but then realized the error of his ways and became a priest. It was a touching life lesson that we can all learn from."

One day, people would learn not to allow him to teach. One day.

"Oh, and mini-me. TA. Have fun with the job."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Saying that in this class isn't cool," Hannibal complained, making a face. "Professor Pajamas already thinks I'm trying to be him."

"Sweetie, it's just as true as your introduction," she pointed out, still looking a little amused. That is to say, not at all.

"Hey hey, mine didn't carry implications that I'm stalking the teacher," he said, making another face at her. "You're sleeping on the floor tonight."

"You can't kick me onto the floor for something you started!" Or he could. But she was going to try making a new rule.

"I didn't start it, Professor Deadpool did," Hannibal pointed out. "I was just following directions. You're gonna make him think I want to emulate him and no. Floor. You. Date tonight."

"Oh, see, I have a better offer already," she said, grinning and tipping her head towards Claire.

"Oh, fine," he said, pulling a pout this time. "I'm sure I can find someone else to sleep with too."

"Well, the floor's probably free now," she teased. "You could save it from getting stood up." Poor lonely floor that it was.

"You're really asking for me to lock you out of the room," Hannibal said, half smiling. "And don't think that I won't try."

"You're really going to start kicking me out of the room for teasing you?" If so, she was going to spend a lot of time sleeping in the corridor.

"In this case, I might try," he said, already plotting how long it'd take him to get back to the room. "And then I'd mess up your stuff and put the gross sheets on the bed."

"Planning how you're going to shove a chair under the doorhandle to keep me out?" Since she did have her own key and everything. It was close to right.

"Yep." No use in lying. "Or I'd find some magical student and get them to magic it shut. That might work too. Or I'd just line the door with something gross."

"What's going to gross me out that much?" She had to ask, she just had to. Strange curiosity.

"Lots of things," he said. "Mayonnaise. Glue. Don't sniff it though."

"You wouldn't put temptation so close to a recovering addict," she decided, shaking her head so seriously.

"If you're strong enough, you'd be able to resist," he replied, smirking.

"The me that has a glue sniffing habit in the first place, obviously isn't," she noted, shrugging. "And that would be mean."

But since that wasn't real, neither was the weakness. Ha.

"The me that is a stalker wouldn't care about mean," he countered.

"Aw, I wasn't good enough to be stalkee?" So sad. About the fake stalking and glue sniffing... Right. "I'm hurt."

"I don't stalk glue sniffers," he said haughtily. "You'd be a bad influence on me."

Angela snickered, nodding a couple times. "Such a sensible stalker," she teased. "Good for you."

"Even stalkers have to have standards," he preened. "And I'm a stalker and a TA. I could technically order you around, couldn't I?"

Re: Introduce Someone

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"Aw, Angela, you can sleep with me," Claire offered.

"I may take you up on that," she said, grinning at Claire and adding a teasing wink, partly for her own amusement, and partly for Hannibal's benefit. He'd appreciate that. Somehow.