Sex Ed - 11/26/08

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

There was no Edward today when the students arrived. There was, however, a rather embarrassed looking Joan standing awkwardly in front of the room.

Once everyone had arrived and taken their seats, she spoke. "Uh, okay, so Mr. Cullen couldn't be here today but he left some notes."

Her face bright red, she read from the information Edward had given her:

"Today we are discussing self-abuse. Pleasuring oneself may sound like a good way to avoid giving into temptation, but in fact, you are cheating both yourself and your future spouse. This desire, this passion within you is a gift for your future lover. Would you give someone you love a fresh bouquet of flowers? Or would you give them a wilted, bruised handful of old flowers?

Today we will discuss ways that you can entertain yourself and distract yourself from tempting thoughts. You may try a couple of my favorites. If these are not to your taste, join up with a friend and make a list of five chaste activities you would enjoy doing if you had a bit of spare time."

Not making eye contact with any of her classmates, Joan indicated a pile of scrapbooking supplies and several Scrabble boxes. "This is what he sent along for us. So, uh... have fun."

Comments

Sign In [11/26]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Embarrassed

Re: Sign In [11/26]

[always-damp.livejournal.com]

Toby Moraitis

Re: Sign In [11/26]

[flashesforinfo.livejournal.com]

Angela Montenegro

Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

What it says

Re: Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[always-damp.livejournal.com]

Toby stared at Joan deep in thought, wondering if giving head counted as a distraction.

Re: Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[swipedthatfoot.livejournal.com]

Claire was just going to sit here and turn purple from embarrassment. This class was so bizarre.

Re: Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[minnesota-teen.livejournal.com]

Amber just stared. Not really sure what to think.

Re: Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[morpherboy.livejournal.com]

Marco frowned. "I think there's a flaw in the logic there somewhere."

Re: Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

To that little lecture, all Cal could do was give a resounding snort.

Then again, self pleasure, most of it inadvertent and ignorantly accidental, had been just as much a part of his life as walking for as long as he could remember.

Re: Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[peace_n_war]

Warren felt the irrepressible urge to thump his forehead against his desk and groan.

Re: Take Notes/Chat [11/26]

[ashockingbitch]

This was beyond ridiculous. It was like the man was an advocate for bad sex. When Jenny was sure Joan was finished reading her bit, she rose from her seat and said, "Hey, everyone! Listen up! Masturbation is the most fun you can have by yourself for free! And it's totally safe, you can't get STD-ed or knocked up or cheated on! And if you are one of those poor misguided blighters saving themselves for marriage, it's a great way to figure out what you like so you can give your future partner a clue and not have bad sex!"

Then she said, "Carry on," and sat back down.

Chaste Activities [11/26]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Play Scrabble or scrapbook or talk about other chaste activities.

Re: Chaste Activities [11/26]

[flashesforinfo.livejournal.com]

This class was never, never going to stop amusing Angela.

She grabbed a few pieces of paper and started sketching out vague scrapbooky ideas.

Re: Chaste Activities [11/26]

[gameknowsgame.livejournal.com]

Blair looked over curiously. "I wouldn't have pegged you for the scrapbooking type."

Re: Chaste Activities [11/26]

[swipedthatfoot.livejournal.com]

Claire pulled out a Scrabble box and started idly sifting the tiles from one hand to the other.

Re: Chaste Activities [11/26]

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Chuck was building little houses out of the Scrabble tiles while thinking of ways he could actually make Scrabble and scrapbooking dirty. Some of the ideas were probably illegal in several states.

Re: Chaste Activities [11/26]

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

When Cal saw Claire fiddling with the Scrabble tiles, he thought to go bug her for a game, but there were two problems with that. It wouldn't exactly work to put some distance between them for the weekend if he followed their date up with Scrabble and, besides, Scrabble was kind of him and Amber's thing now.

So he thought to bug Amber for another round of words and boasts, but they did that all the time now, and he kind of hated how, yes, he'd been using it for a distraction for chaste interactions, and was rebelling against the stupid lecture.

So he thought about maybe making dirty collages with the scrapbooking stuff, but then he remembered there were people in this class that he really didn't want seeing him making dirty scrapbooking collages.

So Cal shifted in his seat, back against his chair, closed his eyes, and tried to nap. It's not like Cullen was there to yell at him.

Re: Chaste Activities [11/26]

[meg-powers.livejournal.com]

Meg pulled out her laptop and started reading political blogs. At least she'd learn something.

Re: Chaste Activities [11/26]

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny decided to make a list. Every activity on it was totally chaste.

Smoking
Drinking
Doing drugs
Starting bar fights
Petty theft

At this point she was pretty much trying to fail this class.

Talk to the TAs [11/26]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Once they ping in.

Re: Talk to the TAs [11/26]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Joan was there but HIGHLY embarrassed.

Re: Talk to the TAs [11/26]

[morpherboy.livejournal.com]

Marco was there, wondering what chaos he could cause on the last day of class.

OOC [Sex Ed 11/26]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

I hope I didn't forget anything! Edward-mun was having some computer difficulties and asked me to post.

Re: OOC [Sex Ed 11/26]

[gameknowsgame.livejournal.com]

*smites the mean computer that is not behaving!*

Re: OOC [Sex Ed 11/26]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Also on the smite list?

LJ and/or Gmail for not sending me ONE DAMN NOTIFICATION from this post so far.