Survive Your Own Cooking - 3rd period - (11/19)

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Today Deadpool was repeating the word 'chimichanga' over and over again. It was a fun word to say. Go on, try it out. Chimichaaaanga.

But, oddly enough, he didn't plan on having the kids make any. Because he didn't think they tasted very good.

"Goooood morning kids! Today we're making a lil' foray into the deliciousness of Mexican food. And no, not the Taco Bell kind. That's like trying to pass the Olive Garden off as Italian. Or Burger King as German. Or Pizza Hut as Italian. I don't know if I can come up with any more examples, but if I do, I'll let you know."

Deadpool cleared his throat and waved his hand toward the tortillas and various meat and protein bits available for them to use. "Today you're making burritos. Be they of the normal beef, pork or chicken variety. Or maybe you like to go crazy and wanna make one with tofu or fish. Or you don't eat anything with eyes and wanna go with refried beans. If it looks unappetizing, my suggestion is to add lots of cheese and the spiciest salsa you can find to mask the horrifying taste of the unholy creation you have brought upon the world." A beat. "Like Damian in food form. I hope you're very happy with yourself people. I hope you're happy."

Oh tangents were just FUN.

"Now shoo! get into groups and try not to burn anything down!"

Comments

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"Let's just put it," Cal suggested, "in the category of 'things that are good for you.' And then cover it in more cheese."

Which he dutifully added to the pile.

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"Cheeeeeeeese," Dōjima intoned reverently. "Sadly, not cheese we can set on fire."

She paused for a moment, tilting her head to the side as she considered their pile. "Or can we? A little tequila and some lime juice, and I bet we could make it go melty."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

Cal smirked. "We can call it fusion food. Mexican, with a little Greek inspiration."

He knew pairing up with Dōjima in anything involving cheese could only lead to brilliance.

"So we can throw in some olives, too!"

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"Mexi-Greecian food!" she cheered. "What else can we add to it, for a bit more of a Greek flavor?"

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"Mexi-Greco," Cal offered, laughing a little, as Dojima's enthusiasm was pretty infectious, and then he considered. "We'd have to..." he mused, "maybe mix in some lamb with the beef."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"Gyro-burritos, I can dig it. It'll be the next big thing in hip dining, and we'll make a fortune from the marketing alone. Think Deadpool-sensei has any spare lamb we can take?" Dojima asked as she set to work poking at the protein piles again, trying to find something that might have once been a cute little sheep. "You know, if you had jazzed up the fashion show as much as we're doing to our burritos, it might have been more entertaining. All that flannel hurt my eyes."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

Cal chuckled a little, and then nudged a packet of meat forward. "That one's definitely lamb," he assured her. "And at least it was all nice and comfy? I'm totally stealing this idea for the diner tomorrow, by the way. The Mexi-Greco, not the flannel."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"I'll be at the diner tomorrow, then, to see what the professionals can make from our darling Mexi-Greco brainchild," she replied. "That's lamb? Wow, so does not look like it came from a sheep. Although I guess all meat looks the same once it's been de-animaled, huh?"

The packet was unceremoniously added to the pile, and Dojima nodded in satisfaction. "And I'm sure it was quite comfortable. Just. You know. Lacking the flair of something as awesome as our fusion food."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"Oh, definitely," Cal agreed, with a stern nod, as he picked up a pan and inspected it to see if it would do to fry up the meat portion of their creation, and, deeming it good, set it on a stovetop to head up. "But it's hard to beat something as flair-filled as flaming cheese. Unless, of course, we were to light the flannel on fire, while people were wearing them."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"Go tell your teacher you want to keep one of the robes, then take it over to Pixie Dust," Dōjima said, grinning wickedly as she started carefully slicing the olives into little rings. "Romeo's the new manager, and he's burning ugly things today."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"You go tell him," Cal said, picking up a spatula and waving it accusingly Dōjima. "Romeo's your boyfriend; you go burn robes with him. I'd keep mine. It's getting cold, and I don't like to be cold. I don't care if it's hideous. Maybe if it's hideous, people would be more inclined to want to rip it off of me."

Yeah, right, Stephanides. At least the boy had a healthy imagination.

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"Maybe if you don't have a robe to keep you warm, you'll manage to convince some cutie to climb in bed and do the job," Dōjima fired back, shaking an onion at him. "It could be a brilliant ploy!"

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

Cal couldn't help laughing at that as he threw some meat into the pan. "You might be onto something there," he said, turning a little pink at the idea of such a tactic having success, but, if anyone said anything, he'd say it was just the heat from the stove. "Although, with my luck, they'll think I was insinuating that they were fat and that I needed their extra padding."

Which was ironic, because he knew that would totally work on Amber, who was thin as a rail.

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"It's all in the delivery," she assured him with a smirk. "You'd be surprised how many girls you can snag with appropriate puppy eyes of woe. Besides, they might be cold too, if the weather is bad enough. You could always offer to recipricate."

"Besides, Romeo's offering store credit for each ugly item turned in from the fashion show. You could get something warm and stylish, in the hopes it gets ripped off."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"Oh, yeah," Cal snorted, "because if there's anything a girl wants to snuggle up with when it gets cold, it's a skeleton. I guess I could use a new winter jacket, though, so maybe I'll reconsider turning in the flannel."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

That earned him an olive tossed at his ear. "Boys," Yurika said in disgust. "Honestly. For as much as you people think girls obsess about our weight, guys are just as vain when it comes to looks."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"Ow," Cal said, rubbing his ear gingerly, although it didn't hurt, it just felt all...weird, and squishy, almost like something he shouldn't be thinking about in class. Then he just frowned a moment, mixing the meat with the end of his spatula. "Never claimed we weren't, but it's one thing if you've got a guy like...I don't know, Toby and Lee from the paper, or Chad and John from the frat, or even Romeo, who are obvious hunks...complaining about their looks, but when you've got someone like me, especially surrounded by guys like that... And you girls don't make it any better. You're the ones we have to be all hot and muscly and perfect to get attention from."

Although, really, as Cal ranted, the person he had in mind wasn't anyone at this school at all, but the bane of his existence for years to come, stupid Rex Reese, who was a fucking man slaughterer, but could still get girls to swoon because he was hot.

Ugh.

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

Yurika snorted with amusement. "You should have seen Romeo last spring, after that whole incident with the time travel and the alien angels. Talk about skinny! I was almost afraid he'd blow away on me."

"But Toby, Cal, really? He seems sweet enough, but he named his Ewok baby after the ethics teacher, and I don't think he can do up his own shirt buttons. Give my gender some credit, we're not all that shallow."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

Cal held up his spatula. "I didn't say he was smart," he clarified. "I was speaking purely on merits of attractiveness, and, no, you're not all that shallow, but don't deny for one second that some of you are."

"Besides," he returned to stirring the meat a little, "as the only other Greek in the school, I felt obligated to include him."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"Greek pride unite?" she teased, sliding the sliced olives off to the side and starting on the onions. "Don't get me wrong, I'm as capable of being as shallow as the next person. I like pretty. Pretty is good. I'm perfectly willing to admit that. Anyone can be shallow if they put their mind to it."

"It's not always a bad thing either." Yurika grinned at him and took a bite of the cheese. "Being shallow can be a great stress-reliever, and no one ever expects you to be able to think past two-plus-two."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"Hello, double-standard!" Cal said with a laugh, almost wishing he could comment on maybe he should have gone through with the girl thing. "You don't want guys to think you're shallow, but then you'll use it to your advantage."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

"Maybe, but it's an advantage I intend to exploit for a good long time!" Yurika said smugly.

"If it's a choice between being dismissed because I'm a ditz or being ignored as a brainiac, I'll take shallow any day," she answered, tossing her hair. "A princess can get away with things the bookworm can't."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, but..." Cal paused for a moment, frowning as he thought. "Doesn't it feel...bad, to know that the only way you can get certain things is to act like something you're really not? I mean, you're smart, you're not an idiot; are you really that okay with people thinking you are?"

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[dojima-hime.livejournal.com]

Yurika paused, then carefully set her knife down. "Sometimes, it chafes, yeah," she admitted quietly. "But you get used to it, and after awhile it becomes habit, and then it gradually becomes more of you than you'd think."

Re: Break Into Teams and Make Some Burritos

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

To that, Cal wasn't sure exactly what to say. At first, he thought maybe he was just being cynical because he'd spent too much of his life already trying to be something he wasn't, but what she said right there was entirely too familiar.

So he just gave a basic, noncommittal "Huh."

Because Dojima was right; it did become habit.