fandomhigh | How to Be a Complete Bitch Without Really Trying, Workshop 7, Period 2 (Monday, August 18)

Class! Class, this week was very exciting! Were they excited, children? They should be! Today was a very special day! Today was their final! Wasn't that right, Jean-Paul?

"Indeed, Mademoiselle Bell," Jean-Paul agreed. "Today is your final." They should be very excited indeed! They were almost done with Jean-Paul and Tink! "And we have a very special final in store for you. It should be an excellent test of whether you have truly learned the way of the bitch, is that not right, Mademoiselle Bell?"

It should! It also contained random humiliation, which, in Tink's mind, was just as important for a final. Because teachers should get to laugh at their students a lot. Why else would one teach? It certainly wasn't for the money. Did the children have any idea what they got paid, here? Here was a hint: not much.

"It is true, we do not. Do not go into education, children. The pay is horrible and you have to deal with, well, you. When you are thirty looking back at yourselves as teenagers, you will agree with me." Was Jean-Paul being bitchy? Yes. He also believed he was one hundred percent right. "Now, your final will be simple. Complete the tasks assigned to you in the proper fashion, and you are done."

Of course, that was only simple for people with full, functioning brains, so Tink wasn't too convinced that all of their students could pull it off, but at least the failures would be entertaining. Tink had a martini and would be keeping score and videotaping anything that looked particularly useful for blackmail purposes. Had Jean-Paul noticed how rich this island was, for blackmail possibilities?

"I have!" Jean-Paul said happily. "Truly, it is a wonderful place. Unless you are the one being blackmailed." They would not speak of the weekend everyone was a pony. Ever. "But remember, children, after the blackmail possibilities, you are done!" That meant they never had to see JP and Tink again! Unless they needed clothes. Or got stuck in one of his classes. But other than that!

And that was a very, very good thing indeed. Now shoo! Off with you! Time to final!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Agnes GLARED at the teachers. "This isn't really part of the final," she declared. "It has nothing to do with the class. You just want us to make fools of ourselves for your own amusement."

"Oh, no, it really does have to do with the class," Jean-Paul said. "Pinky swear."

Notice he didn't specify how...

They really ARE bitches.

Agnes glared again, tied the dress around her waist like a belt and tucked the shoes into it, and then marched up to the stage and began to sing.

Agnes could sing very, very well, but also, when she chose to -- like now -- she could sing very, very, VERY badly. And loudly. It couldn't be called "dissonant", if only because mere dissonance gave up and ran home in the face of Agnes's onslaught.

"On the GOOOOOOOOD ship LOLLYPOP!!!..."

Jean-Paul winced, but nodded encouragingly in respect for her strategy. "Do not forget the mustard, mademoiselle!"

Agnes nodded and opened the mustard while she kept singing. Instead of pouring it on herself, however, she laid the bottle on the floor, with the nozzle pointing at Professor Beaubier, and STOMPED on it as hard as she could.

And suddenly Jean-Paul was several feet away from any flying mustard. "I have superhuman speed," he told her. "Silly child."

Agnes stared. "Well, bully for you," she grumbled. "Are we done here?"

"As done as we are getting, I suppose." And then he...smiled. "Congratulations. You passed."

Agnes stared at him, not sure how to take that. "Oh, wonderful."

How to Be a Complete Bitch Without Really Trying, Workshop 7, Period 2 (Monday, August 18)

Re: Round Four: Abject Humiliation (8/18)

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Re: Round Four: Abject Humiliation (8/18)

Re: Round Four: Abject Humiliation (8/18)

Re: Round Four: Abject Humiliation (8/18)

Re: Round Four: Abject Humiliation (8/18)

Re: Round Four: Abject Humiliation (8/18)

Re: Round Four: Abject Humiliation (8/18)