fandomhigh | The History of Sex: Workshop 1, Period 3 (Thursday, May 15)

Barney looked around the classroom and adjusted his tie wearily. "Please tell me this group will be better," he said to Tink.

Tink didn't hold much hope that it would, really. But look! Look, Barney! She'd brought booze! Booze was the best teaching aid ever. It made you not hate the students half so much! Here! He should drink some! Mmmm, booze!

"Has anyone ever told you you're a saint?" Barney asked, pouring some sweet alcoholic nectar for himself. "A tiny, bouncy little saint, with...oh right, students."

With students? Wasn't he about to say -- OH! Students! There were students here. Hello, students! She was the fabulous, wonderful, amazing Miss Tinker Bell ...

"...Along with your Professor of Awesome, Barnabus Stinson," he finished. "Please, feel free to call us Professor Stinson and Professor Bell. No formalities here."

And they should remember that the very best students were the ones who took care of their teachers. So what if officials called them "bribes"? The officials weren't the ones handing out the As, now were they?

"And should these supposed officials ask, we say, 'What bribes?'" Barney grinned. "Now, this course is about the History of Sex: and other stuff. You'd better get yourselves ready as we are about to blow your little teenage minds. And I hope to God none of you are virgins. Well, other than Ron."

He was here again? Awwww, Barney's grandson took the class! Hi, Barney's grandson! See, he was totally embracing his inner Awesome and well on his way to living up to those latent Stinson genes he had somewhere. Maybe some day that would even mean losing his virginity. Maybe. Didn't Barney just want to pinch his little cheeks?

"Not really, no." Barney peered at his pixie counterpart, deciding she had to be kidding. "Regardless, you're here to learn about sex from ~~meta for~~ Smurfette to cybersex."

There was a lot of sex out there, and a lot of people doing it, in strange and interesting ways! Ones that could possibly destroy your mind, children. Had they ever really thought about sex? Everyone out there is the product of sex, except possibly the frog-thing. He was felt and felt didn't seem likely to reproduce sexually.

Barney shuddered and drank deeply. "And so today we'd like you to introduce yourselves. Tell us of your best or worst sexual encounter. Or make up something good."

The children should remember that this was a safe, learning environment, and they should try very hard not to laugh at one another very much. Except she would be. Some of these should be good. But treat one another with respect. More or less. Try, anyway.

"Also, everyone meet Dawn, our TA for this course. Dawn, feel free to make Ron your bitch," he grinned at the lovely Ms. Summers, wondering if Ron would pass out just by proximity to such an attractive young female. "Now, how about we get this introductory party started with....you!" Barney said, pointing at a random student.

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The glare had migrated from Cardiff way to Tink and Barney. "Gwen Cooper, nothing out of the ordinary, and none of your damn business."

Of course it was their business. They were educators. This was a serious topic and how could they mock the students appropriately if the students didn't share embarrassing and horrifying personal details?

Gwen wasn't buying it, so much no.

Not to mention the fact that reconciling her experiences with her new age would be awkward at best.

But since her last brush with fairies had left her with a healthy wariness... "I once walked in on two of my friends. Accidentally." Well, it wasn't like they'd been that embarrassed by it.

That ... sounded as though it could range from very fun viewing to horrifying trauma, depending on how unattractive the friends in question were.

Did the girl need some booze? Tink had some.

They were both very attractive men so it involved more giggling than trauma, but Gwen wasn't exactly going to turn down free booze if it was being offered.

The History of Sex: Workshop 1, Period 3 (Thursday, May 15)

Re: The Introductions [5/15]

Re: The Introductions [5/15]

Re: The Introductions [5/15]

Re: The Introductions [5/15]

Re: The Introductions [5/15]