Interdisciplinary Studies, Class 3, Friday, Period 1

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Squall wasn't alone in front of the classroom today. There was an annoying jingly green glowing bug zipping around, this way and that, gesturing rather emphatically. There was also a long clothes rack on wheels, filled with all kinds of outfits, taking up a good portion of one wall. Squall had, in fact, dragged the stupid thing all the way up to the school from downtown, and he wasn't terribly happy about it.


"All right, class," Squall said, tossing the sign-in clipboard at a random student. "This class is all about what you NEED to know and DON'T, so today we're going to learn about something absolutely vital: how to dress yourselves in the morning. Because most of you don't seem to be able to without your mothers around." It was hard to tell with the bangs in his face, but he seemed to be glaring pointedly at Rikku. "Not well, anyway."

It was at this point that the jingly green bug swooped in front of Squall and stomped her foot. She gestured several times. Wasn't he even going to introduce her? What a ripoff! And she let him take all of those pretty clothes from her store!

Squall sighed at her. "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce Tink. In addition to stealing liquor, she also sells clothes or something, so she's good at the whole 'fashion' thing."

Tink pirouetted happily. She was! She was very good at fashion. She was also beautiful, kind, gorgeous, giving, and she was staying with Squall out of the goodness of her heart. And 'Tink' wasn't her full name, either, but she could be generous and let that slide. See how generous she was? And he needed to buy more tequila. They were out.

"Really? Out of tequila? AGAIN?" Squall glared at his roomie. Then he looked out at the class. "Extra credit for anyone who brings me liquor."

Then he shrugged.

"Okay, so. Class. Right. Point one: You can't just throw on whatever you feel like. If you look like you've slept in your clothes, you're doing it wrong." Squall HAD, in fact, slept in the clothes he was wearing. It's not that he couldn't see the hypocrisy in that, he just didn't care.

Tink dug the wand from her cleavage and began writing in mid air. Point 2: Colors matter. She then gestured to convey the rest of her point: colors were good, colors weren't something to be avoided - and she gave her roommate a pointed look for that - but colors had to work together. Find a color wheel. Love it. Understand it. Stop throwing things together that were never, ever intended to be in the same room.

"Right", Squall said. "Or you could just stick with black. Black goes with everything. Actually... point three is: tight, black, leather. If you've got at least one of the three, you're on the right track."

Tink rolled her eyes, but he had a point. Tight, black and leather were always good in her book. More writing: Point 4: Know your body. She tucked the wand away for more gesturing. If you were tall, wear things that played that well. If you were short - and there was a death glare here implying that anyone making short jokes about her would die painfully - wearing things for very tall people would only make you look stumpier. If you had an enormous rack, you could dress in ways to show it off, or dress in ways to minimize it, but dressing as though you had tiny boobs was just going to look bad. Not everybody can wear everything. Not even someone as gorgeous as herself.

"Uh, huh. Yes, we've all seen your boobs by now." It was Squall's turn to roll his eyes. "But that leads up to point five: You can get away with more if you're hot. So make sure you clean yourself up. You know, shower every once in a while. Brush your hair. Stand up straight. Uh. Smile, or whatever." Squall shrugged. He'd showered yesterday and run his fingers through his hair this morning. That was good enough for him, but most of these kids needed work.

Yes. Smile, says the crazy grumpy guy. Tink stuck her tongue out at her roommate before pulling the wand out again. Point 6: Attitude. Rules can be broken if you know how to do it properly. Looking like you've slept in your clothes can work, but only if you carry yourself in a way that suggests this is the latest trend, and all of you plebians don't know the least thing about fashion. In fact, just about anything can be chic if you have the presence to carry it off properly.

Squall nodded thoughtfully. He still couldn't understand most of what Tink tried to say, but he sure as hell wasn't going to let the class know that. "Yeah, what she said." He shrugged. "Okay, so break into groups and discuss. What does fashion mean to you, or whatever, how badly are you dressed today, that sort of thing."

Tink waved a little and indicated that they should feel free to use her fabulous, fabulous outfit as a starting point for discussion. Wasn't she chic? So very, very stylish?


After the discussion, Squall thwapped a yardstick on his desk to get everyone's attention. "Okay, everyone. We're not even going to discuss what you're wearing right now, because it's wrong." Tink made a gagging face and pretended to choke herself. Very, very wrong. "I want all of you to come pick something off the rack and change into it, and then come up to the front of the class and show it off, one by one. Let's see if you've learned anything."


"Your homework for next week is to wear something that doesn't suck. Class dismissed."

[Wait for ocd or the fairy gets it! Clap your hands if you believe in tequila-stealing roomies!]

Comments

Sign in

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Or whatever

Re: Sign in

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny Sparks

During the lecture

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Take notes, sleep, fight pirates, believe you can fly, etc.

Re: During the lecture

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny actually paid attention during the lecture, as this was one of the more entertaining classes she'd had in a while, though crazy feminism guy still won for that.

Re: During the lecture

[not_in_the_book]

Ronan was sitting there, amused, for the whole lecture.

Re: During the lecture

[im-fullmetal.livejournal.com]

Ed might have been inclined to like Tinker Bell after her obvious disapproval of the 'short' word.

Not that he'd admit it.

Re: During the lecture

[the_merriest]

Rikku couldn't help it; she was snickering.

She totally already knew the colors thing. She was an Al Bhed, after all.

Cluemeter reading: 0.

Re: During the lecture

[key-of-heart.livejournal.com]

Sora smiled brightly seeing Tink and chuckled at her and LeonSquall's antics.

Re: During the lecture

[intraspective]

Ino was wide awake and hardly believing her ears - they got to pick out clothing?

This was the best class ever!

Discuss!

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Fashion, the personal meaning to you of:

Also, bitch about Squall hating your clothes.

Re: Discuss!

[ashockingbitch]

Jenny, who happened to be wearing a Union Jack tank top and white leather trousers, said indignantly, "There is nothing wrong with my clothes!"

Re: Discuss!

[not_in_the_book]

Ronan's own choice for clothing today happened to be an emerald green shirt he'd bought from a certain local proprietress, the sleeves rolled up slightly, with chocolate trousers and matching shoes. He raised his eyebrow. "Something wrong with the way I dress myself?" he asked.

Re: Discuss!

[im-fullmetal.livejournal.com]

Ed looked down at his...well, okay the brown was boring and wearing gloves all the time annoying, but what could he say, his brother STILL was keeping his red coat.

"What does it matter what it looks like? Long as it's comfortable and wears well," he asked.

Re: Discuss!

[the_merriest]

Rikku bounced up. "Hey! I look totally fine! This is like, all Al Bhed and stuff. Plus it's bright and fun and you were saying to wear colors. I did, see?!"

Re: Discuss!

[key-of-heart.livejournal.com]

"What's wrong with my clothes? They're black, and they have some leather and they're magic!" He grinned proudly.

Re: Discuss!

[grenfelzer.livejournal.com]

Carmela? Happened to be wearing her favourite outfit: Pink boots, neon pink and green floral print cargo pants, and a black t-shirt. \

"Anything with lots of colour is good by be," Carmela says with a nod.

Re: Discuss!

[intraspective]

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" Ino demanded with a toss of her head. She was wearing her usual purple, sleeveless, turtleneck tank top, clean bandages wrapped around her waist and down her legs. Over the bandages was a hi-cut purple skirt that reached her knees. Blue open-toe shoes completed the outfit.

Show off a new outfit

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Pick something off the rack, try it on, and show it to the class. And if you think Squall and Tink aren't going to snark at you, you're not really paying attention.

Re: Show off a new outfit

[not_in_the_book]

Ronan selected a shirt, pushing the sleeves up to three-quarter length, a pair of jeans, shoes, and finished off with a pair of leather wristbands and a silver pendant that sat only just below choker height.

Re: Show off a new outfit

[the_merriest]

Okay. Now they'd pissed her off.

So let's start with a dress that was vibrant and cheery and pair it with boots that even an Al Bhed might go, "You know? Those colors? Not so much."

A kicky little hat for fun, and you know what the outfit really needed? That'd be a purply-black scarf. A weird looking one.

It was like performance art! Only tackier. And if she thought it was tacky ...

Rikku burst out of the changing room, waving her hands excitedly. "Ta-da!"

Re: Show off a new outfit

[intraspective]

They didn't like her bandages? Fine then, she'd try something else.

A bit of looking found her a cute dress, and a pair of shoes that were far better looking than her sandals (not that that was hard). Finding a hat that Ino wasn't sure went with the rest, but figured she might as well try it on.

"Is this better?" She asked, hands on her hips, once she'd changed.

Talk to the guest

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Say hi to Tinker Bell, unless your name is Wendy.

Re: Talk to the guest

[tinkerbitch.livejournal.com]

Tink was here. Tink was possibly examining the drawers in the feeble hope that somebody, anybody, kept a stash of absinthe in this room.

Talk to the TA

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

After she pings in.

Re: Talk to the TA

[ashockingbitch]

Here was Jenny, looking slightly indignant still about her taste being called into question.

Be annoying

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Talk to Squall after class.

Re: Be annoying

[im-fullmetal.livejournal.com]

"Professor?" Ed said with much less sheepishness than he should have had. "So I think I'm supposed to be in your class. But I ...didn't know" translation: didn't pay attention "until just now."

OOC

[whatever-sucks.livejournal.com]

Because OOC is our friend.

Re: OOC

[tinkerbitch.livejournal.com]

Do I even need to point out here that Tink is going to hate everyone and what they're wearing, regardless of how valid that is? If so, consider yourself warned. Ze pixie is a bitch.