fandomhigh | Ethics [Thursday, September 6]

Anakin walked into his classroom precisely on time and gave the students assembled there an appraising glance.

It wasn't possible to tell what he thought of them.

"I'm Master Skywalker," he said in a voice that was intended to carry, "this is Ethics, and we're going to skip the introductions--I'll figure out who you are--and move straight to our first discussion."

He paced around the room, cloak flaring out behind him, as he handed out the syllabus. "Today's topic," he said. "Self sacrifice: knowing the difference between saving people and being a pretentious twit."

"Any time I ask a a group of people what they would do to save someone they love, they all blither on about how they would set the world on fire, lie, cheat, steal, kill, die, et cetera, et cetera. I've been at this school too long to believe that half of you haven't already been put into this situation and I'm in no mood to hear adolescent ramblings about how wonderful you were or might hypothetically be. We're going to ground it in reality.

"A month ago there was a woman who was in charge of this school. She had been placed in power legitimately, was allowed to punish in accordance with that power, and began pushing the boundaries of her authority almost immediately. She called students to her office, punished them for slights genuine or imagined, and began escalating the severity and frequency of her punishments, going over the line into what was no longer acceptable."

Anakin crossed his arms over his chest, the scar across his face very evident in the light coming through the window. "It eventually took a team of highly qualified adults to take her out. Today's topic: when do you draw the line? When do you admit to yourself that a problem cannot be solved, that to sacrifice yourself isn't a statement, it's merely pointless? How long does it take for you to check your ego?"

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"My intervention would be dependent on an evaluation of my powers compared to those opposing me." As she had told Kerrigan the other day she could not openly fight the Alliance. She could not go against anyone using magic, that frightening yet tempting power. Give her a bunch of reavers any day.

Anakin nodded. "And how close would the odds have to be for you to attempt anything?" he asked.

"Emotional involvement makes me likely to overlook discouraging odds." She smiled a little. "The usual answer."

"The usual follow-up, then," Anakin said. "How long would you have to argue with your family members or friends before they'd let you sacrifice yourself to save them? Would you even give them that opportunity?"

"No." The answer was simple. Simon would never agree to it, she suspected. "The choice is mine. I estimate the predicted loss."

"And inflicting that kind of loss on your family? Does that factor into your decision at all?"

River gave a quick nod. "Would estimate from their emotions," she said simply, but she knew it wouldn't be simple. Just like she couldn't imagine what losing Simon would be like, she also couldn't know what he would feel losing her, because he didn't know himself.

"It's not something you should ever have to feel," Anakin said quietly.

"Won't. Interpolation only. I'd be dead." She spoke matter of factly, no emotion visible.

"Not necessarily," Anakin said. "If they think you're dead, their pain is just as real."

River raised an eyebrow, giving Anakin a questioning look. "There is a reason why I couldn't tell them the truth then?"

"It's a last-ditch Jedi technique," Anakin said after a pause, "dampening your spirit in the Force so that no one--not even another Jedi--can find you. There's just an empty vacuum where you used to be. It feels the same as a death."

"Have played dead before," she said, thinking of how the rest of the Serenity crew had got her and Simon into a hospital once. The memories made her face go white, but not as much because of the pretending to be dead as because what happened after. "Useful. But hopefully there's a resurrection at the end of the day."

Anakin sent a wave of reassurance towards her along with a small smile. "Many times," he said.

Just not always.

"Then their pain will pass," she replied with a small smile.

Ethics [Thursday, September 6]

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