fandomhigh | Stabbing People for Fun and Profit: Mercenary Work for Beginners, Monday, Period 4

Deadpool was very bad at remembering to let his students know where they were meeting each week. He blamed being distracted by marathon of the newest cycle of America's Next Top Model, despite that being on Sunday and not last week in class. He'd get better at letting the kids know to go to the Danger Shoppe, really he would.

Someday...

"Today we're going to talk about a topic near and dear to my heart," Deadpool said, grinning at the students happily. "No, it's not Bea Arthur, though she will always be the love of my life despite what those restraining orders say. No, today we learn about guns! You know, those pretty things that go boom when you pull the trigger, unless you have a silencer and then it's more of a hissing fwump noise that sounds a lot better when those onomatopoeia's actually happen in the panel, but noooo, they don't happen here."

Sometimes he missed the panels and the horrible exposition and the being able to shout a soliloquy in the middle of a short jump because time stood still for it. Then he remembered the horrible manboobs and rejoiced at being here.

Though it would be nice to be able to get his yellow font back.

"Now instead of going though the massive amount of guns out there for you to use, I'm going to just let you try out three of my favorites." He held up one heck of a handgun and waggled it in the air. "This pretty girl here is the Desert Eagle. And I don't just like her because she has commercial appeal, that's part of it, but it's also because she packs one heck of a punch." Pause. "And just look at her! Don't you want one of these?"

He picked up another, much larger gun. "And this is the Avtomat Kalashnikova 1947, also know as the AK-47. The best thing to come out of Russia since vodka and Anna Kournikova. Now, yes, this is an older gun, but I always say that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. And also that spleens are less fun to have removed than one might imagine, but that's for a completely different reason." He cleared his throat. "This beaut was made back in '47 and is still used today, what does that tell you other than the Russian military stockpiled them and they slowly leaked onto the black market and were favoured due to their durability and accuracy after years of use? Anyone? Anyone?"

He sighed. "Fine, how about this one?" Deadpool asked, holding up a sniper rifle. "Finally we get to the sniper rifle, your friend on those long distance relationships with a target. Less easy to do than it sounds, really. There's wind, angle, whether or not you get distracted by that damn teeny bopper song you have stuck in your head for a month or two when you're supposed to be waiting to kill a Greek missionary because he knows too much and you feel very Cosa Nostra about the whole thing until they slip out of the country and you have to hunt them down in Sweden. You have any idea how boring Sweden is? Do you?!"

(TMI, huh?)

"So! Try them out, not on each other please. That'll get you detention and me smacking you upside the head." He looked directly at Sokka. "Got it?"

"Have fun!"

[[ooc: ~~Please wait for the~~ OCD is up!]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Evil, horrid, little firelord to be!

Deadpool watched him carefully so that there would be no more random making out in class. Mel, in his mind, was just an innocent victim in this.

And had a really awesome gun so she got a free pass.

It was a good thing Zuko didn't notice Deadpool watching him just yet. He studied the gun for a while, then looking at some of the other students he copied their stance. The trigger didn't pull as easily as he'd expected, but when it worked, Zuko almost jumped at the noise and the bullet missed by far.

Making a face, Zuko instantly put the gun aside.

"Try it again or else I'll hug you!"

That was helpful motivation, Deadpool style.

"And then tell your girlfriend that you hit on me!"

Because that was totally believable, really it was.

Zuko scowled at Deadpool. Then punched a flame at the target which instantly caught fire.

"Done."

...effective.

"With the gun," Deadpool replied, arms out for a hug as a warning.

Zuko scowled... and then for some reason remembered his homework for Crichton's class.

"You just want a hug, don't you?" He couldn't believe he just said that.

What, what?

"Maybe?"

"Don't worry, it's perfectly normal. You're just misunderstood," Zuko told Deadpool. He'd need a shower after this.

This was very, very weird.

"Zuko? Are you taking drugs? You can tell me if you are, I won't even yell at you, just calmly ask that you stop."

"I'm fine," Zuko reached for the gun, holding it out to Deadpool. "Maybe you aren't feeling too well. Shooting something might help."

Shooting things did make him feel better...

Deadpool shrugged, taking the gun and shooting the human shaped target between the eyes in one swift motion before handing it back to Zuko. "Muuuuch better. Thank you!"

Zuko quickly put the gun aside again and nodded. "Nice aim. Keep at it," he said, starting to back away.

"No, no, no," Deadpool said, walking toward him. "Now it's your turn."

"No, it's yours," Zuko argued. This was kind of fun. Not that he'd admit it.

"I'll hug you, so help me. And then I'll tell Aly about your girlfriend."

Re: Try out the Guns!

thebluespirit.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 22:38 (UTC) - Expand

Charlie stared, blinking a lot. It was one thing to hear about it, and see what Johnny could do (sort of); it was another to see someone else do what she used to be able to.

She wished Katara wasn't so certain he was a jerk. Then again, he was always making out with Mel... would she make out with a jerk?

Zuko didn't really notice anyone watching him, he was too busy trying to trick Deadpool. When that finally settled ~~with someone getting hugged or not~~, he scowled at Deadpool and put the gun aside again. He'd stick to firebending, thank you very much.

Charlie waited until after she'd shot the gun, and Zuko was done arguing with Deadpool, before she approach him. "Hey." She really wished she had a way to be subtle about this. "So, um. That was firebending, right? What you did to the target?"

Zuko looked a bit surprised at the girl and nodded. No one had recognised firebending before. "Yes. You're familiar with it?"

"I heard about it from someone at one of the campfires." Probably not a good idea to mention Katara, if their tribes were at war. "Johnny Storm can do something like that, but I haven't seen him take out a target." She smiled a little, pushing her hands into her pockets. "I'm Charlie, by the way. Sorry, I just got curious."

Zuko's first guess was that it had been Katara anyway.

"I'm Zuko. Bel can use fire too, but it's not bending," he explained with a shrug.

"Bel. I don't think I've met her?" Charlie cocked her head. "What's the difference between bending, and, uh. Not-bending?"

"Him," Zuko corrected with a hint of a smirk at Bel being mistaken for a girl. "I don't know how not-bending works. Firebending means that you breath in the energy around us and turn it into fire. Why the interest?"

"Um." Internal flail, hopefully disguised as just being shy. "No reason. Well. I'm sort of dating Johnny, and I got curious." There, not even much of a lie. "I can do stuff, telekinesis... I was wondering how similar that was."

"I don't know how that works," Zuko said simply.

girlzippo.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:39 (UTC) - Expand

thebluespirit.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:43 (UTC) - Expand

girlzippo.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:44 (UTC) - Expand

thebluespirit.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:48 (UTC) - Expand

girlzippo.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:51 (UTC) - Expand

thebluespirit.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:52 (UTC) - Expand

girlzippo.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:55 (UTC) - Expand

thebluespirit.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:57 (UTC) - Expand

girlzippo.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 21:59 (UTC) - Expand

thebluespirit.livejournal.com - 2007-06-04 22:01 (UTC) - Expand