fandomhigh | School Assembly, Friday afternoon, The Auditorium

Entry tags:

!event: assembly

School Assembly, Friday afternoon, The Auditorium

Before the assembly, The Tick used the same mysterious process that chooses students for the detention lottery for another purpose.

He had written a play. Destiny told him that all the world was a stage and he was but a player, meaning that he was playing the part of someone that got people to play parts that he created. It was very meta.

Anyway, the curtains opened to start the assembly. It was time for The Tick's first play: A Time for Bagpipes.

[OOC: Cast, please handwave getting roped into this as a result of the announcements this morning. It may be a good idea to look at the plottery post to see what I told different people just so you can be better prepared.

Again, I'm very sorry about the last minuteness and the general WTFery of this. Feel free to go nuts, though. This is a play by The Tick that you had at best a couple hours to look over. Things need not make sense have fun. And thank you for volunteering and attempting to make this work!

Oh, and people in the later acts, don't feel obliged to wait for people in earlier acts. Jump in whenever.]

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Main Cast:

Serendipity, a lovely young woman with monkeypox................. Annette Hargrove
Sheriff Highcastle, a sheriff hunting evildoers of all species... Cassie Lang
Monkey, a monkey................................................. John Conner

Near a farm, we catch up with Diego's true love, Serendipity, who has monkeypox. Only a song performed by her true love on his bagpipes can cure her. Also, the sheriff hunts a monkey.

[OOC: No, I do not have more plot for you. This is an establishy act. But hey, monkey!]

Cassie stood on stage, a prop rifle (with a cork in the end) in her hands.

"Well now, piiiiilgrim," she said, in the worst John Wayne impression ever. "Where's that evil monkey gone to?"

John was safely hidden in a prop tree.

Cassie sighed, exaggeratedly.

"That varmint will see the bad end of my rifle before this day is out!"

John flung ~~poo~~ an apple at her.

The apple hit Cassie right in the back of the head, which got her a little ticked off.

And caused her to grow about two feet.

"Hey, that's not in the script!" she said.

"At least it's not real poo!" John exclaimed, shaking the tree.

And falling out.

"Owfuck."

Cassie went to try and grab the falling John.

"Ha! I have caught you, horrible monkey!" she said, trying to preserve some semblance of the script.

"Good save," he murmured, as she caught his head, leaving those unimportant limbs to smack on the bad dismount.

"You'll never catch me!" he said, trying to wrestle free.

Cassie just grew bigger to be able hold John even better.

"Not when I'm the incredible growing sheriff, you won't!"

[ooc: Alas, disappearing for several hours.]

John flailed like a flaily thing. "Leggo!"

Cassie shook John a little. "Nope. I have caught you, and now I will take you offstage to boil you. Or something." And Cassie proceeded to take the John Monkey offstage with her.

"Oh, watta world, watta world!" John crowed. Like a monkey. It works, shut up. As he was being dragged offstage by an 8 foot John Wayne limping sheriff... who was going to boil him?

Annette was humming along cause she figured that was exactly what anyone with a name like Serendipity would do. Humming and picking flowers and sticking them in her hair.

"La la, lalala, lala," she sighed dreamily and looked up and smiled at the sky. "If I ever thought there was a an evil sort of monkey around I would run, I would run far far away. But everything is right in the world. Yes indeed. Lala."

John sneezed offstage. Sneezed again. On his fourth sneeze, he was shoved onstage. "Stupid costume," he muttered. "Hey," he said to Annette, "you got a tissue?"

She whispered, "I'm Serendipity!" She reached nonchalantly like under her dress and ripped part of her petticoat off and handed it to him. She tried very hard not to laugh at his costume too.

John does his best not to stare. Really. He takes the petticoat and blows his nose, a big honking sound. And again.

"Thanks! What with the weather change, and my hay fever, feels like I'm coming down with something," he said theatrically. "I hope I'm not sick."

Annette refrains from smacking her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing, so she just sort of bites really hard on her bottom lip.

"Maybe you should get away from me?" she says politely as she could while managing to move a few feet from him. She would run, if she had to. Monkey and all, you know? And eeek! Her gown was drooping, dang heavy velvet!

"Lala..."

"But what if I use up all this handkerchief thingie? Then I'll be nuthing but a snotty monkey," he declares.

"Then I'll give you more." She turned and started to walk away from the sneezing monkey cause ew. "For now I think you should just go away and leave me alone. I'm clean. I'm pretty. I don't want your snotstuff on me. I have to...find...something."

"What do you need to find? Maybe I could help," he said, sneezing.

"Oh, no. Thank you kind talking monkey creature. I know where it is, this thing I have to find. You just go on now, about your business. Shoo shoo." Annette lifted her gown and made a show of walking quickly away from the moneky, around the stage.

Monkey!John followed her. "But I wanna heeeelp!"

"No! Stay back. You can't help me; it only takes one person to find what I need." she moved faster and slipped her hand down the front of her gown to grab her big long rubber banana.

John chased her as she brandished her big yellow rubber banana ~~not dirty~~

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