fandomhigh | Driver's Education - 3rd Period

"Today we're going to learn all about that wonderful thing we call road rage. Now I, for one, think that road rage is both healthy and normal, and believe that in this overly PC world we have forgotten about the poor angry people out there that just want to be free to cut others off and then throw scalding cups of coffee at those who anger them." He slammed his hands down on the desk like an angry southern lawyer who was standing up to injustice in a Grisham novel. He always wanted to be a young and angry southern lawyer but was held back by being Canadian. "When did America stop being a free place to live? When I ask you?!"

(That was a little over the top.)

He coughed once to clear the Grisham-ness from his system.

"I have a handout about how to avoid the perfectly acceptable rage," He said, waving toward a small pile on his desk.

Grinning and bouncing slightly on his heels he continued, "Buuuuut, I think that there's an easier way to work through the rage. And no, it's not boykissy or getting to kill people. That's sadly not legal. The killing, I mean. Boykissy is perfectly legal, just not something I wish to partake in despite any salacious rumors you may have heard. And don't look at me like that Door, you'll just have to live with the porn that I in no way am supplying you with because that is unacceptable behavior for a teacher and could get me arrested despite sleeping with the sheriff. She has a lot of rage, which is usually nice, but I'm not really harboring any jail time soap dropping fantasies so..." Another awkward cough. "I need to stop over sharing with you kids now before I get shot or something."

Reaching under his desk, he pulled out a large plastic bag. "Foam bats! We're going to work out our rage in a healthy and constructive environment." Deadpool was quite proud of himself for being about to say those two words in italics. He still had it. "Have fun beating each other up!"

After class was finished and most likely bruised, Deadpool made a small announcement before letting them leave. "Don't forget, next week in the Danger Shoppe for more ways to get rid of that nasty Jack Nicholson-esc taking a golf club to a car windshield type rage."

[[ooc: ~~Please wait for the~~ OCD is up!]]

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And here was Conner, foam bat in hand!

Z felt that Conner would also make an acceptable Sky Tate substitute. BOP!

Conner, had he known this, might have objected quite mightily to being compared to the blue guy. He was objecting to the bopping, in any case.

THWACK!

Except for how in Z's reality Sky was going to be the red guy.

Z giggled and thwacked him again anyway.

Oh, good. In theory that would make Conner feel a lot better about the whole thing.

Which was all a moot point anyway since it wasn't like he actually knew any of this.

He tried to use his speed to loop around Z and thwack her from the other side.

Oh, so they were using superpowers, eh?

Z created two duplicates and surrounded Conner. Thwack thwack thwack!

"Not fair not fair not fair!" Conner protested, laughing.

He supposed he could, maybe, possibly, move fast enough to keep up with the duplicates, but being terrified for the integrity of his shoe soles, he opted for flailing wildly (but really really quickly) with the bat in some bizarre attempt at defense.

"Hey, not the nose!" one of the Zs objected.

"Not the hair!" Conner retorted from somewhere in the middle of a frenzied foam flurry.

The three Zs redoubled their attack, this time with the specific intent of mussing his hair.

Driver's Education - 3rd Period - 3/20

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