fandomhigh | Library [02/06]

Sam thought about trying to come up with an excuse, but the truth generally worked better with Dean. "I want to see if I can guess what number you pick."

"Never would've thought you'd get that bored surrounded by all these books, geek like you," Dean commented. But what the hell, he'd play along. "Okay," he said, thinking of the number 5.

Sam concentrated for a few moments, trying to see if he could pick anything up from Dean. "12?"

"Nope. So... what? I win something?"

Sam sighed and headdesked a little. "Yeah, you win the chance to laugh at me for trying something stupid."

"Wouldn't be the first time," Dean observed.

"Ha ha ha," Sam said dryly. "I was trying to see if I could read your mind."

Dean nodded slowly. "Why?"

"I don't know. I just figured if I can have visions, maybe I can do other things too. But I can't even make the visions happen when I want to," he admitted.

"Well, maybe there's just nothing about to happen that's dire enough for you to need to have a vision," Dean suggested.

"Maybe," Sam replied sullenly. "You'd think that if I was going to have to deal with this, I'd at least be able to control it."

"Yeah, but you gotta give yourself some time," Dean said. He shook his head, smiling fondly at his brother. "Though I guess it's consistent -- you used to get so upset and angry when you were learning to walk. You wanted to skip all the middle steps and be able to run right away."

Sam smirked. "Patience isn't one of my strong points, I know," he said. "But I don't think a little bit of control is too big a step to ask for."

"It's not," Dean agreed. "But unless you've been hiding stuff, this is the first time you've tried to get control. That kinda thing is going to take time, Sammy."

"I haven't been trying. But I figure if I'm going to tell Dad about this, I probably have to accept that the visions aren't going to stop." Sam smirked lightly at Dean. "As much as they suck, they are kind of good for helping us save people."

"Can't argue with that since I was one of the ones they helped save," Dean said, smiling at his brother.

"Yeah," Sam said fondly. "And now Blair and Parker too. Dawn keeps calling it a gift and...I don't know what to think anymore."

"I think trying to learn more about it and if you can control it is a good place to start," Dean encouraged.

"Think I can learn that without talking to Dad?" Sam asked.

"I think the two things don't really have much to do with each other."

Sam sighed, and nodded. "No, I guess not."

"He's not going to flip out," Dean told him. "Not the way you think he is."

"How do you manage to sound so sure about that when you really don't know?"

"Because I know Dad and I know how he feels about you," Dean said with a shrug.

Sam wanted to remind Dean that his opinion of how their dad felt about him was exaggerated, but he didn't feel like arguing right now. "Maybe. I still have to figure out when to tell him. We don't have the same ways to figure out when he's in a good mood as we used to."

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