fandomhigh | Library [01/10]

"With fishhooks! And sandpaper! In places where fishhooks and sandpaper should never, ever, ever, ever be!"

Yeah, that would be what Conner's stuck on.

Not literally. Thankfully.

"Yes, but I thought--" Door stops. And replays the entire conversation. And tries very hard not to flail.

It's always kind of tragic when the flail backfires. Not that Conner realizes it yet.

"Thought what?"

Yeah, Door utterly fails at not flailing. She is a flailure.

"Well, I didn't think you were that traumatized from just reading about it."

"Dude," insists Conner. "Fishhooks should never go there."

"Well, clearly." Door tabs down a bit, then makes a face. "Neither should semi-colons."

"I don't even want to know what you'd do with a -- oh. Oh. Yeah, this is the sort of thing that's going to make punctuation rise up and revolt someday."

"Why would someone write that?" Yes, she already heard the I DON'T KNOW back when she thought it was the answer to a completely different question. But asking again might distract from the flailure. "I mean... does someone somewhere actually think that's sexy?"

"Definitely not me," Conner says, probably using up his entire stock of emphasis for the week. "But the scary thing is, somebody probably does. Which may or may not be scarier than the fact that someone thinks it's funny."

Door rallies, or at least makes an attempt to. "Well... the look on your face is funny..."

"I think my face is stuck this way," Conner complains. "It has been since an hour ago."

"Maybe if you turned off the computer?"

And yet she makes NO MOVE TO DO SO.

"I tried that!"

Actually, he hasn't actually done anything except alternately stare, and scroll down.

"Maybe we could work together? I'll close my eyes and reach for the switch, and you just tell me left or right and up or down."

HEY THERE HAVE BEEN STUPIDER PLANS TO ESCAPE BIGGER MENACES. ~~Hummus we're looking at you.~~

YES. YES THERE HAVE.

"Okay," Conner says. "Let's try that."

He's still kind of staring at the text on the screen, though.

Door closes her eyes. And reaches. For the laptop.

This thing is such a trainwreck. Conner seriously can't look away. And the page ends, maddeningly, right in the middle of one particularly trainwrecky sentence.

"Okay, um, a little bit to the left."

Yeah. Toward the Page Down key.

Door moves her fingers a little to the left. For various factors of 'a little.'

"This doesn't feel like an off-switch."

"Well, no. But one of those annoying Yes or No boxes just popped up on the screen and I want to get rid of it first."

"I assume the answer's no." But Door dutifully presses the button ~~like a complete tool~~.

"The answer is oh my god that's nasty and how is that even physically possible?"

D'oh.

Door opens her eyes and starts to turn to glare at Conner except well, SCREEN.

"I hate you."

Speaking of things that shouldn't be physically possible, the human face shouldn't be able to contort itself in as many simultaneous ways as Conner's appears to be right now.

"I kind of hate me too at the moment."

"...Want to try that again only you close your eyes and I'll guide ~~when I wake up~~?"

"Sure, why not?" If he can get his eyelids to function ~~much like his player's which now refuse to stay open~~.

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