School Assembly, Friday afternoon, The Auditorium

[bugofjustice.livejournal.com]

The Tick took the stage once the audience was nice and full and smiled. "Crime is a broken drive-up ATM machine. It doesn't pay. Trust me, as a former full-time and current freelance Bank Teller of Justice I know this well. Sure, the ATM is faster when you get it to work, and it's the easier way to make money, but it'll break down, leaving you high and dry. And broke. It's best to park the car, go inside, do things right, and cross that Vestibule of Right because otherwise you're going to end up with nothing in time!"

"Trust me, I've been a superhero long enough, I know what I'm talking about!"

"Today's speakers are criminals who've learned how bad the life can be, who've learned that it's not worth the chance of saving a little bit of time only to end up unable to retrieve your Money from the Bank of Law."

[OOC: Standard assembly stuff. Threads for speakers are marked, please don't comment in those threads until the speaker has, speakers should also ping into the Q&A thread.]

Comments

Re: Speaker 6: Mojo Jojo

[nadiathesaint]

A monkey in a blue suit with a giant brain . . . helmet . . . thingy came scurrying up to the podium.

His cape was, indeed, magnificent.

"Thank you. Hello students, who are here to learn many things and teachers who are here to educate, teach, and illuminate the students on the many things that they are here to learn. I am Mojo Jojo! The greatest monkey criminal mastermind in the world! There are many other great monkey criminal masterminds, but they are all lesser masterminds than myself, Mojo Jojo because they are inferior to me! But I am here to tell you that crime does not pay. Crime is when you bend, break, or ignore the rules that the governments, which are people who tell you rules, tell you. And it does not pay any money whatsoever. And the reason why, which I will tell you now, because that is what I am here to do, is because of superheroes. People who are there to protect, safe-guard, and generally keep the rules safe from great monkey criminal masterminds, like myself, Mojo Jojo! Yes, even I, Mojo Jojo must face superheros like the Powerpuff Girls, who are annoying, irritating, and bothersome little girls who stop great monkey criminal masterminds from doing their great, monkey masterminded crimes! And they will stop you, prevent you from doing your crime, and keep it from paying you! That is why you should not be a criminal, like me, Mojo Jojo! And that is what I am here to say. . . ."

This went on for some time.