Win Friends and blah blah blah... Afternoon [8/8]

[dr-snark.livejournal.com]

Dr. Cox is looking rather smug this morning as all the students come and take their seats.

"All right newbies, every once in a while a situation comes along where you need to handle it with kid gloves. So today's class is all about Let's take for an example an old patient of mine. Let's call him.... Bob. Bob hasn't been listening to his regular doctor about his heart and arteries and has somehow smuggled in a dozen White Castle sliders into his hospital room after having a quadruple bypass surgery. Your options are thus:"

Be *shudder* Nice
"Gee Mr. Geldoff I know those hamburgers are awfully tasty but perhaps we should go over your diet and see what we can do to make you healthy again. Okay Buddy?"

Be Direct
"Hey Bob? No offense but this eating habit of yours is going to send you to an early grave. You've ignored the warning signs even after having surgery and if you continue this practice it will have dire consequences"

Be Me
*sharp piercing whistle* "All right Bobbo, I'm only going to tell you this one more time so you better start using those flaps on the side of your head or so help me I'll rip them off and give them to my intern who could so use them. Did you really thing having White Castle after surgery was the brightest idea ever? Why didn't you just open a can of lard and start shoveling it into your face because it's having the same effect. You know the whole quadruple bypass isn't just a warning sign tubby, it's a freakin' billboard teetering over and about to crush you like an ant. So if it were me? I'd either start eating something green and stop trying to eat a heifer in one sitting. 'kay?"

Your assignment is to approach three different students using one of the methods above each for one or more of the following delicate situations:

1. Your significant other is a fish
2. Your significant other has a thing for bellboys
3. You have a booger hanging on the end of your nose
4. You have something in your teeth
5. That thing you had for lunch was tainted by E Coli
6. You have cancer
7. You have toilet paper stuck to the end of your shoe
8. You're bald. Everyone knows you are wearing a rug
9. You're a little pudgy.
10. Your fly is down and your fashionable underwear is showing


[OOC: Wait for the OCD is up!]

Comments

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"What are you talking about?"

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"You know. The thing. With John." Greg looked sad. "Is there anything I can do?"

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"You really want me to answer that question?" she asks.

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"Could I maybe make an outfit out of kelp for you? I'm good at that," Greg suggested. "You know, so you'll fit in when you visit."

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"...What?"

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"The sea," he clarified. "To see John."

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"You know, if this wasn't an assignment, right now I would be asking you what you did."

Which would be unfair, true. But if Greg knew before she did, he can take some blame.

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"I don't know how to turn people into fish." Greg looked at her, all sympathy. "Did you do it by accident?"

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"...What?"

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"Turn John into a fish."

As though repeating it made it make any more sense.

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"How the frell would I turn John into a fish?"

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"It doesn't matter. Are you okay? How are you coping?"

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

Aeryn glares at him.

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

Greg smiled sweetly.

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

Aeryn points across the room. "Go over there."

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"Are you worried a fisherman might catch John?" Greg wondered.

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

Aeryn's still pointing, jabbing her finger in that direction for emphasis.

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"A responsible fisherperson would ensure he didn't end up in a can or something," he told her.

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"Do you even understand what you're saying?"

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"Am I confusing you?"

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"Always. Go away."

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"I understand it's a confusing time for you," Greg said quietly, nodding seriously. "But I'm here for you. Need a hug?"

Re: Assignment:

[can_be_more]

"Come near me and your arms will end up in a different room than the rest of your body."

Re: Assignment:

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"I think I'm going to go over there for awhile," Greg said, pointing in the direction she had indicated.