Win Friends and blah blah blah... Afternoon [8/8]

[dr-snark.livejournal.com]

Dr. Cox is looking rather smug this morning as all the students come and take their seats.

"All right newbies, every once in a while a situation comes along where you need to handle it with kid gloves. So today's class is all about Let's take for an example an old patient of mine. Let's call him.... Bob. Bob hasn't been listening to his regular doctor about his heart and arteries and has somehow smuggled in a dozen White Castle sliders into his hospital room after having a quadruple bypass surgery. Your options are thus:"

Be *shudder* Nice
"Gee Mr. Geldoff I know those hamburgers are awfully tasty but perhaps we should go over your diet and see what we can do to make you healthy again. Okay Buddy?"

Be Direct
"Hey Bob? No offense but this eating habit of yours is going to send you to an early grave. You've ignored the warning signs even after having surgery and if you continue this practice it will have dire consequences"

Be Me
*sharp piercing whistle* "All right Bobbo, I'm only going to tell you this one more time so you better start using those flaps on the side of your head or so help me I'll rip them off and give them to my intern who could so use them. Did you really thing having White Castle after surgery was the brightest idea ever? Why didn't you just open a can of lard and start shoveling it into your face because it's having the same effect. You know the whole quadruple bypass isn't just a warning sign tubby, it's a freakin' billboard teetering over and about to crush you like an ant. So if it were me? I'd either start eating something green and stop trying to eat a heifer in one sitting. 'kay?"

Your assignment is to approach three different students using one of the methods above each for one or more of the following delicate situations:

1. Your significant other is a fish
2. Your significant other has a thing for bellboys
3. You have a booger hanging on the end of your nose
4. You have something in your teeth
5. That thing you had for lunch was tainted by E Coli
6. You have cancer
7. You have toilet paper stuck to the end of your shoe
8. You're bald. Everyone knows you are wearing a rug
9. You're a little pudgy.
10. Your fly is down and your fashionable underwear is showing


[OOC: Wait for the OCD is up!]

Comments

Re: Assignment:

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

Peter stared at him with shock, amusement, and maybe the slightest bit of awe. He was, for the moment, completely speechless.

Re: Assignment:

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

Tyler smirked. "You're drawing flies, newbie," he said. "Got something to say?"

Re: Assignment:

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

"Just that I was rather sad about telling you the bad news. Now? Not so miuch," Peter replied.

Re: Assignment:

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

"What bad news?," Tyler asked, ishifting back to himself.

Re: Assignment:

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

"Did you enjoy your lunch?" Peter asked.

Re: Assignment:

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

"I had a sandwich," Tyle said. "Tuna. Why?"

Re: Assignment:

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

"It may be the last sandwich you ever enjoy," Peter said, mock-sadly. "It's come to my attention that it was covered in e coli."

Re: Assignment:

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

Tyler made a face at that. "...ew. Are you sure?"

Re: Assignment:

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

"I am. I hope you've made your peace with your Maker," Peter said. "I hear it can be vicious."

Re: Assignment:

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

Tyler knew the symptomns of e. coli in extreme detail. Which was why he was going pale. "It can," he said. "Um. Thanks for letting me know."

Re: Assignment:

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

Peter - who didn't have a clue what e. coli whas - nodded gravely. "I felt it was my duty as a friend."