Library, Monday, 6/26

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

Tyler yawned as he opened the library; he had slept even less than usual the night before. He gripped his coffee tightly as he settled in behind the desk.

The library was open.

[OOC: New job = I'm here until about 1:30 EST and will pick up any tags after 10. Also, Bob is a ghost only Tyler can see; that thread is locked and Bob's presence is NFB unless the pirate can see ghosts.]

Comments

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

Tyler shook his head slowly."No. There's no such person." A voice in the back of his head said, You deny me, but you're still using my name. Real nice, buddy.

"I'm just- " His throat was dry, and he forced himself to ignore the voice.

"I'm no one. A kid with problems. And I dragged other people in. I don't know how to apologize to you. I can't."

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

Bob shook his head. "No. You're our leader. You showed us how to stop being slaves. You made us better."

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

At those words, Tyler felt a rush of pride. The feeling made him gag.

"I took away your life," he said, because whatever else Project Mayhem had been, good or bad, there was no question about that. "Is that better?"

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

"It was for a while," Bob replied. "And it could have been for longer, I think."

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

It was Tyler's turn to be confused, and the tears were really stinging at his eyes now. "I don't understand."

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

"Before Fi.." He put his hand over his mouth to stop himself from saying it out loud. "Before I joined, all I had was the support group. Then after I joined, it was better. I was a man again. I was part of something important. And it could have stayed better. But it didn't, because.." He trailed off and looked back at the book.

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

"Because you died," Tyler said dully.

He buried his head in his folded arms. "You died because you believed in it. Because I made people believe in it."

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

"No, not it. You."

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

"I tapped into something," Tyler said, not disagreeing. "It, me, whatever."

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

"We were better, for a while. All of us. But we're nothing without you."

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

Tyler smiled, a truly wretched smile.

"No. With me, you're nothing. You're rotting bones that are somehow talkng to me and why did I let the shrink cut back on my meds?"

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

"Why did you leave?" Bob asked. "You weren't there when I.. now you're not there for the others?"

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

"Didn't think about them," Tyler mumbled. "Just got locked away, then I got out and came here. I was hoping it was over."

His eyes grew curious, and his stomach felt sicker because he knew it wasn't over, not really. "You think they're still waiting."

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

"Of course."

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

And for some reason, that idea, the image of dozens or hundreds of fight club members waiting, wanting to hear what to do, making their own lip print scars while they talked of Tyler Durden, was the thing that finally made him cry.

"Waiting," he echoed.

[kawalsky.livejournal.com]

Bob watched Tyler cry, then started to fade away.