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Earth Tourism, Tuesday 5th period

Lana met everyone with her usual calm smile when they got to Portalocity. "We've been focusing on natural interest recently, so I thought we'd go to a city this time. Venice is a place in Italy - that's on the continent to the east of us. It was built over and around over one hundred islands, with canals interspersed as well, so there's a lot of water travel and quite a few bridges."

Their portal opened and she ushered them through. "We'll be taking a boat tour to see the most of it. And we'll have just enough time beforehand to grab some food to go from a local coffee house. Sorry it's not quite the culinary experience eating in would be, but we're strapped for time."

She grinned. "So, follow me!"

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"Oh good, it's--" Nope, he had to watch himself here to not say the wrong thing. "It's a plan. I'll work my weather magic to make sure it's a nice night." After a moment, he added, "That was a joke, I can't actually do that, but I realized it sounded plausible."

Of course! This was very much not anything but a plan! They were friends and nothing more than that and it would be terrible if someone were to get the wrong idea!

"I mean, at this point, I'm not sure what the Force can or can't do," she admitted with a smile. "So I really might have expected you to do that otherwise."

"I mean, I'm sure some people can sense weather changes, but it's not a skill I have. The Force is... complicated. People's skills can vary greatly." That wasn't helpful, Cal. "If I could control the weather, you would know by now."

"It would be cooler and rainy?" Arden teased. "How many bottles of sunscreen have you gone through already?"

She would, of course, have to murder him. That much rain would be hell on her curls. She absently reached out to pat them just thinking about it.

Her hair was super-cute, Cal, did you really wanna mess with it?

"It wouldn't be rainy, just cooler and cloudy so the sun wouldn't hurt as much," he said. Her hair was, in fact, pretty great and he didn't want to mess with it in any way that wasn't pleasant for both of them. "I haven't gone through a whole bottle yet, my face isn't that broad."

"You know you put it on every part of you that the skin sees, right?" she teased. "Face, neck, arms--" Please take care of your arms, Cal, they were a national treasure. "Anywhere you don't wanna be burned, since the goddess didn't see fit to grant you melanin."

...Yes, yes, she also wore sunscreen, especially now that she had a tattoo, but shh.

"I mean, my shirts have sleeves most of the time. I don't have to be outside nearly as much here," he pointed out. "I just take my runs in the evening when it's cooler and it hasn't been a problem. I don't want to smell like sunscreen all the time, isn't that annoying?"

He cared about how his body odor affected other people, that was a win, right?

Honestly, yes. She was still going to flail over three-in-one and washcloths and legs, but there would be the underlying gratitude that those were her complaints.

On the other hand, if they hadn't been, this stupid crush would be long gone, if it'd ever happened at all.

"So long as you're not getting sunburned, you're doing all right," Arden assured him. "Mine is mostly fragrance-free?" She dug out her sunscreen and handed it to him. "It kinda smells like cocoa butter, but I smell like that anyway, so..." She shrugged. "I think it's mostly pretty subtle."

Look, if you didn't like how cocoa butter smelled, there was no hope for you anyway.

Edited 2024-06-12 20:06 (UTC)

Cal rolled one of his sleeves up and sprayed the sunscreen on his arm, grinning as he sniffed at it. "That's why you smell like cookies. I thought it was a perfume," he said. "If I tell you I'm used to being sunburned and it's not a big deal, you're going to sigh at me, aren't you?"

"I'm sighing already," Arden told him, heaving a giant one for show. She was also fighting off a smile as he described her scent. "I don't like most perfumes or fake fragrances but cocoa butter is a great moisturizer. How else do you think I get this glow?" She posed a moment before cracking an eyelid to eye him suspiciously. "If I ask you what you wear for a moisturizer, I'm gonna sigh at you some more, aren't I?"

"I thought moisturizer was for women?" he asked. "Am I also supposed to glow? I don't have anything to moisturize except my hair."

Help him, Arden Finch, you were his only hope.

Did it count for the TikTok meme if they'd been married by a robot under the influence of gremlin venom?

"Moisturizer is for anyone who has skin, Cal," Arden said, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Do you have skin? Then you can use moisturizer. I promise you, cocoa butter is not gendered."

But at least he understood that his hair required moisturizing. "What kind of conditioner do you use, anyway?"

"I do have skin, as the freezing trip last week made me painfully aware of," he said.

He thought for a moment, trying to remember any kind of details about what happened in his shower besides bad singing and occasional disassociation. "Uh, it's in a blue bottle? And smells like oranges. I found it at Turtle and Canary, it's this gel that kind of takes care of everything. It's pretty cool."

The hand gestures of vague shampooing and body washing action were so helpful!

"Sweet goddess," Arden muttered. "...Cal, do you have a middle name? Is Cal short for anything?"

What a strange question! "Uh, nope, it's just Cal."

Look, he needed a government name and if he didn't have one naturally, Arden-provided would do.

She inhaled deeply, her palms pressed together in front of her mouth. "Calcium O'Reilly Kestis," she said, slowly and clearly, "we do not use three-in-one shower gel in this house. Because we love ourselves. Okay?"

Somehow, this was Dean's fault, she was sure of it.

Laughing wasn't going to help her frustration, but he couldn't help it. "Okay, I have to get that name on my bounties somehow, that was amazing," he said. "And what's wrong with the three-in-one? It does three things. In one. Isn't that good?"

Arden sent a wondering glance at Professor Beniko. Would she be upset if Arden pushed Cal overboard? Would she understand if Arden explained it was about three-in-one? Was Arden willing to get another detention regardless?

It was only because she was pretty sure Cal would do some kind of stupid Jedi trick instead of hitting the water that she demurred. But oh was it tempting.

"Cal, would you trust an oil that was for cars, pocket watches, and airplanes?"

Edited 2024-06-13 01:06 (UTC)

Trusting fully that she would never harm him, Cal said, "Well, probably not because those are three different things, but if it was for three different parts of the same machine, I probably wouldn't understand why it wouldn't be effective."

You started this metaphor, Arden, just saying.

She probably should have used a metaphor she understood better, too.

"Just because everything is part of the same machine doesn't mean every part needs the same thing," Arden said. "Your hair is different than your skin and needs to be treated differently. Shampoo and conditioner have two different - and opposing functions. You're asking a single product to do three different things on two different surfaces and expect it to them all well?" She scoffed. "This is definitely one of those times you find the items that does fulfills its single job best and just get each of them."

Please, Cal. Arden is begging you.

"Not everything is created equal. It's like how you don't use dish soap as hand soap, even though they're both soap."

Cal opened his mouth to point out that the dish soap said it was also an antibacterial hand soap, and then stopped himself because now didn't seem like the time. "That seems like a lot of effort. Isn't it hard to keep track of all that stuff? I mean, I understand why you might want to do all that, because you look great. Lovely. Uh, I mean, glowing, like you said."

This is why he hated going places without BD, because it was easier to get out of saying stupid things with him around.

"It just seems like a lot more than I might need, yeah?"

Cal. Cal. She was pretty sure that if she were a Jedi, she'd be going Dark Side right now. For, like, four different reasons, at least.

"No," she said, shaking her head firmly. "It's not more than you might need. Have you seen Dean Skywalker's hair? Do you think he uses three-in-one? And I have every faith that you're capable of keeping track of three things: shampoo, conditioner, soap. I believe in you. And your ability to count. To three." Four if they were going to include moisturizer, but Arden was willing to let that go for now. For self-preservation.

"If you really want a specific, scientific breakdown of why a three-in-one isn't great, I'll give it to you, but I think? In the end?" She reached for his hand and squeezed. "It's gonna come down to whether or not you're willing to spend more than the bare minimum on yourself. Maybe you're not trying to glow or look extra attractive, but there's still no reason to not give yourself the best care you can. Unless you're telling yourself that you don't deserve the best."

Well, Cal? Were you?

Did cocoa butter help with burns? Because Cal was feeling a little scorched right now.

"I try not to think about what Jedi masters use on their hair." They hadn't even gotten into shaving, and keeping those beards trimmed so nicely had to be some kind of magic. He got quiet for a moment as she squeezed his hand, because oof, she saw right though him, didn't she? "The minimum has always been fine. It would be kind of hard to be on the move with a pack filled with product bottles," he said, like that was any kind of excuse here. "Vanity isn't an acceptable Jedi trait either."

Arden appreciated you, professor.

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