fandomhigh | Intro to Fandom; Monday, First Period [09/12].

Intro to Fandom; Monday, First Period [09/12].

On the board of the classroom that morning was a map of Fandom, with a big yellow star marking the location of the radio station, and several large pictures of various squirrels in hats with little notebooks and pencils in their paws (and one porg intern). On the desk at the front of the classroom, a few tiny bottles of liquor were lined up. And if you couldn't figure out what the topic of today's class would be with all of that, then someone (perhaps even your teachers here in this classroom right now) had failed you, and it was time to remedy that failure.

"Some of you may have noticed," Summer started, wielding a pointer stick almost like a weapon as it went smashing down on one of the pictures, "these guys all around the island, and they were definitely in your field guide for the scavenger hunt last week, but we need to talk about them a little more. These, you see, are radio squirrels."

“They’re mostly harmless,” Stark said, eyeing the stick in Summer’s hand a little warily. “Irritating, of course, especially when they drag you out of bed. Or when they neglect to tell anyone they saw you being kidnapped and held in a bunker.” Not that Stark was bitter. Really.

“That probably won’t happen to you,” he added after a moment. “The raccoons only bother me usually and I’m sure all of you will be fine but the squirrels bother everyone. Unfortunately."

"But," he continued, waving his hand toward the tiny bottles on the desk, "you can bribe them if you need to."

"It also helps," Summer added with a grin, "if you get in good with the people who do the reports, too. They can easily skip over things the squirrels write down, after all."

"There are plenty of things I don't say or loud that they've written down," Stark agreed. "I wouldn't want everything said about me. I don't want everything said about me." The squirrels certainly didn't need to report on, say, any vibes between any co-teachers.

"Hell," said Summer with a snort, "even I don't want everything said about me on radio."

Especially not any vibes. Ones that were totally not even there, anyway.

"That said," she continued, "in this classroom right now, as we speak, there are absolutely radio squirrels. And they are very good at hiding. And they are probably sneakily writing down outrageous things about you that aren't even true," such as vibes existing!, "that they fully plan on including in the report tomorrow morning. Your mission, if you choose to accept it," hey, she was absolutely not going to judge anyone who thrived off outrageous rumors, she got that, totally, "is to find them, and either bribe them or convince them to stop the presses and not print these baseless lies. Or make friends with them, as well as one can make friends with a radio squirrel."

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Like a creepy little spy.

TJ Wagner

Beta

Come to the horrifying realization that the squirrels are everywhere and see everything.

There are four squirrels somewhere in this room (potentially the porg intern, even!). You have little mini bottles of liquor and your wits at your disposal. Can you manage to stop the vicious rodent rumor mill? Or do you gleefully feed in to their squirrely shenanigans?

Okay, this was kind of exciting. And TJ was absolutely not above bribing.

"Any squirrels who want liquor, come and get it!" she announced, waving the little bottles.

Well, that seemed to have gotten at least one squirrel's attention, poking its head out from behind a curtain in the window.

Clinging to said curtain, it leaned forward a little with a note of intrigue, trying to see just what kind of booze.

As if that mattered.

Score! TJ grinned.

"Half a bottle now, half if you bring a friend," she cajoled, showing him the little bottle of tequila.

Half a bottle? Half?

The squirrel let out an offended squeak at such a low-ball offer, letting TJ know exactly what it thought of it by firmly slipping back behind the curtain and adamantly yanking it back into place.

"I mean, you could just stay back there and get none," TJ pointed out. "I can't even buy this stuff legally yet, so what's here is what you get."

And their complete total, utter lack of vibes.

For a brief moment, this class almost had Summer wondering if she should go back to doing radio, but she was harassed by squirrels enough as it was, thank you, she didn't need that energy back in her life again.

"Did you have a good weekend?"

This question contained zero vibes. Obviously.

Unfortunately, due to the nature of the question, certain vibes were rather unavoidable in the answer, although they were, of course, entirely different vibes.

Mostly.

Because Summer really couldn't help giving a soft, pleased smile in response, one that also felt oddly reserved and even a little apologetic. "I did," she confirmed, already a little wistful about it. "I had a really nice time...

"How about here?" she asked, glancing over, because he didn't really want to actually hear about her very nice weekend, did he? "Did I miss anything good? Did Tino manage to rope you into the 3MDs?"

Summer was his friend and Stark wanted her to be happy! If she wanted to talk about her weekend he'd listen. And not be at all awkward about any vibes, for reals.

"Good. You deserve to have a nice time," he said, offering a small smile of his own. "And yes, he did. I was barely in the door before he wrote my name down." The smile had turned into an eyeroll with that last sentence.

Tino was the worst.

Well, maybe not the worst. Summer might be warming up to the idea that maybe he wasn't actually all that bad...

(Just give her until Wednesday, she clearly still had her good vacation goggles on).

"Good," she said, grin growing all the more for that eyeroll. "And how'd they go? Any of them particularly really terrible?"

"Nothing really terrible, no. Jon, and Billy who I hadn't met. Margo. I like talking to Margo. And then Constantine. It was fine. Just...not necessary?"

"But I went. Wouldn't want to disappoint you."

"A lot of things we do are not necessary," said Summer with a faint snort, feeling almost like she could (should?) add 'not disappointing her' to that list, but, well, it did feel kind of nice, didn't it? "But we still do them because they can be fun. Or good for us. Or so people aren't disappointed, which I'm not, so thank you, Stark. I'm glad you didn't bail out."

Stark found it necessary to at least try!

"I did my best. And it was fine. I do like talking to Margo." Even if she'd called him a cinnamon roll and he'd forgotten to look it up.

"And Rey was there. I saw her, after."

Well, she definitely hadn't been wrong.

"Yeah?" Summer's interest piqued just that slight bit more. "How is she doing?"

Oh, sure, Summer was going to get plenty of chances to get that question answered straight from the source tomorrow, but still! And, more importantly...

"Did she get roped into it, too?"

Please, please, please say yes, Stark, ohmgoooooood.

"Tino made her do it too," Stark confirmed. "And I think she seems alright."

But maybe she was just being Rey.

"She said she might like company."

Summer's smile softened significantly at that, and she gave a little nod. "That's good, though," she said. "Her wanting company."

Much better than the alternative, which was isolating herself, which was something she worried about Rey doing a lot, and something she felt wasn't very beneficial for her, in the long run.

"I'll definitely have to check in with her," she decided. "After class."

Which was actually now a surprisingly convenient set-up for the establishment of some sangria later on.

Isolating yourself was easy though! And then nobody tried to make you talk and you could just wallow. Not that Stark had experience with that sort of thing.

"Good idea. I told her I could offer company whenever she likes. I think you're better company."

"Well," said Summer, oh-so-modestly, "I meaaaan.....truth, but, like, don't feel bad about it, or anything, I'm practically, like, the gold standard there."

Plus, she always had booze and drugs readily available, and sometimes even the good shit, so that definitely helped, if you asked her!

(If you asked her, she'd be tempted to say that that was most of the reason why people liked her company, but, really, if you considered her friends deeper than surface level, the perspective really didn't hold that much water with most of them).

"You're very good company," Stark said, maybe a little too seriously. "I've always thought so."

Even without the booze and he'd never taken advantage of the drugs.

And maybe it was that seriousness that caused Summer to just meet that with a skeptical look and a challenging, "Always?"

Because false-modesty-as-a-shield aside, she figured you'd be a little hard pressed to find someone who couldn't admit that she could be a bit much at times...especially knowing that there definitely had been times when Stark had gotten the brunt of it before.

Not as bad as some, sure, but still!

"Yes."

Stark paused, then nodded. "Yes," he repeated. "Or I wouldn't come back."

Just because sometimes Summer said things he didn't like didn't mean she wasn't good company.

Summer was still going to look very, ver skeptical about that.

"That feels like a challenge," she noted.

One she had no intention of actually taking, for once, because, while she would definitely not feel comfortable saying that she always enjoyed Stark's company, she did usually enjoymit, to the point where actively trying to dissuade him from shared company was not at all appealing.

Also, it was Stark, so it would probably be a lot of work, and who had time for that?

Edited 2022-09-12 16:51 (UTC)

Admitting there were very few people Stark would rather have for company was probably not the wisest move and he could recognize that.

"It's not meant to be a challenge!" A pause. "What would you do if it were?"

Did he need to be very, very concerned?

"....I don't know," Summer admitted, especially since anything she did think of, in that moment, definitely confirmed her previous statement of a lot of work, with a side helping of just having to be a generally terrible person, which she preferred to avoid if she could.

And then a pause of her own before adding, "Clearly, the jello hasn't been working."

Stark's smile was somewhat relieved at that last statement.

"You're not really trying to scare me away with the jello. I know better. Some of them you make for me!"

And Summer had to smirk a little at that, feeling her own relief that Stark had picked up on the joke there.

"You know," she said, "now that you mention it, that's probably why it hasn't been working, then."

"Last week's cupcake though..." Stark sighed and shook his head. "That almost worked."

And to that, Summer could only preen.

"Thank you," she said. "I think, though, that my plan to use eating the cupcake as an incentive for people to do well backfired on me when I forgot to take Goose into account."

And you had no one but yourself to blame for that one, Summer.

And, well, maybe Fate, for having taken the counterbalance of Ignis out of the equation with that one. He truly was the culinary yin to her terrible food yang.

"Goose is...a mystery," Stark said, unable to come up with a better word.

"Hopefully this week won't be so horrible."

"Goose," Summer stated, and look who was being just a little too serious now "was never properly socialized outside of a toxic environment that emphasized extremes, and so he never really learned about limitations, and so outside of a firm hand of guidance, he's like a loose cannon. That's why he and Ignis worked so well together, even though, on the surface, it might not make a whole lot of sense, but since he had to go and get portal blocked and is probably dead now, he's like a wild horse with his reins flapping behind him in the wind....

"Anyway," she continued, cheerfully, a beat later, "this week'll be great, I'm taking inspiration from a different participant this time!"

Didn't that just make you feel so much better and soothe all your worries, Stark?

Stark blinked a few times, feeling like he'd just learned more about Goose than he had the entire time he'd known him. He nodded.

"I don't know much about him." Other than he had appalling tastes in food and drink and sometimes.

Summer really had missed her calling. Some people got paid to psychoanalize their friends in this much detail!

"He's just very..." Now, suddenly, it seemed Summer was going to mince words. "Enthusiastic. Just....don't ever get into a spaceship with him behind the wheel, if you can help it."

Because Summer cared about you, Stark. And your well-being.

"I wasn't planning on it. I don't get in many spaceships at all, usually."

"Going to help Rey wasn't usual," he said, in case that wasn't obvious.

He'd much rather get in a ship with Summer, anyway.

It was all because she had that sweet new disco ball in the back now, wasn't it?

"Well," Summer said with a smile, "going to help Rey is a good exception. Even if you did get shot."

Dot. Dot. Dot.

"A little."

The disco ball was clearly the only reason Stark would want a trip in Summer's ship. Clearly.

"Even if I got shot a little," Stark agreed, looking a little sheepish. "It's much better."

What other reasons could there even possibly be?

"I would hope so!" Summer remarked. "If it wasn't by now. I'm pretty sure that something was seriously wrong with it."

There were no other reasons. Certainly nothing to do with vibes. Or feelings.

"Will did a good job patching it up," Stark said. There might be a scar? But chicks (and pretty firefighters?) dig scars, right? And he had plenty of those already.

Stark could offer some tips on dealing with squirrels, or ignoring squirrels if asked. Or he could probably talk about other things, if asked.

With a special thanks to any special guest squirrel friends!

And, hey, I mean, creepy squirrels are canon:

*squirrels at you*

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Intro to Fandom; Monday, First Period [09/12].

Sign In - Intro to Fandom, 09/12.

Re: Sign In - Intro to Fandom, 09/12.

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Listen to the Lecture - Intro to Fandom, 09/12.

Class Activity: Find the Squirrels - Intro to Fandom, 09/12.

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Talk to the Teacher - Intro to Fandom, 09/12.

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OOC - Intro to Fandom, 09/12.

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