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Practical Philosophy, Friday

"It's been a calm week," said Ender, sitting as he was underneath a tree on the lawn. The usual spread of sandwiches and drinks was set out before everyone on the blanket.

"I've always found that this place inspires dread when it's quiet," he said, taking a thoughtful sip of his water. "That sense of 'something will happen, sometime, and we don't know when'."

He set his bottle down.

"But I'm told I'm a paranoid person," he said. "I'm curious about your experiences. Does Fandom have you sitting on the edge of your seat, alert and aware anything can happen? Or do you take a more easygoing approach - whatever will be, will be? Or has the island simply not given you anything to be fearful of, because you're used to worse?"

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Fearful.

Astrid Magnussen

Clare Devlin

Drink some soda.

"I'm curious about your experiences. Does Fandom have you sitting on the edge of your seat, alert and aware anything can happen? Or do you take a more easygoing approach - whatever will be, will be? Or has the island simply not given you anything to be fearful of, because you're used to worse?"

"I think," said Astrid, after a while, hesitating more for having to sort through a few thoughts and pick out the ones she thought would work best for the discussion than anything else, "I've just come to appreciate the quiet times. Bad things can happen everywhere, any time...."

Sometimes, it was just a long line of bad things, hopping along from one to the next.

"It's nice to get a chance to breathe."

"So do you feel that the over-the-top strangeness of bad times in Fandom are, in essence, the same as any other bad time?" Ender asked. "Provocative thesis."

"I didn't always feel this way," Astrid said, with a small, almost wry, definitely quiet kind of sad smile, "but I think the over-the-topness makes it almost easier to deal with. Like, it's so overblown. But it's eventually over. The other stuff, the smaller things, they stay....more. They linger."

She nibbled the edge of a sandwich thoughtfully.

"I'm not afraid of dark forests any more, but I still don't like milk and certain shades of blue. You don't even realise how much those little things're cutting you down until you reach in and all you've got left are ribbons."

"'Lingchi'," said Ender. "Death by a thousand cuts. The Chinese left it for their worst criminals for a reason."

He picked up his bottle, thinking.

Astrid breathed out with something that might have been a faint laugh, taking a larger bite of her sandwich so that the excuse for politeness while chewing could excuse the silence that followed.

Their worst criminals. So...what was her crime, Mother? Being born? Or simply not being you?

She took a drink, the sugar cloyingly sweet.

What’s she guilty of? I mean, in your mind. Really. Murder, or being a lousy mother?

She shrugged. "No point in worrying about what tomorrow brings when you don't even know what's in store for today."

Edited 2021-05-21 13:45 (UTC)

"I don't know," Ender said. "They do say preparation is half the battle."

"Yeah?" asked Astrid, with no avoiding the wryness in her grin now. "And what's the other half?

"Besides," she added, "there's just some stuff you can really prepare yourself for, anyway. Or you think you have, but you get it all wrong."

"The other half is improvisation when your plan turns out wrong," Ender said, mouth curving briefly.

"I think that maybe they," said Astrid, with a notch of a smile back, "might be a little off on their math."

"Do you really think that because your preparations might be wrong, you might as well not make them at all?"

"I never said that," Astrid said softly. "And I just think that maybe it's more 20/80 than 50/50. And there are things you just really can't prepare for."

"I'm normally a pretty easy-going person," Clare said and it was important that she thought that about herself despite a mountain of evidence to the contrary, "but this place is insane."

"Would that be dread," Ender asked, "Or are you just stunned?"

"I think the stunned part might be wearing off a wee bit," Clare said.

"Are you finding things you actually like around here?" Ender wondered.

"I have a job!" Clare said, sounding very proud of herself.

"Congratulations," Ender said, earnestly. "Where?"

"At the flower shop," Clare said, "though I don't know too much about flowers yet. But if Dennis can run that shop in Derry and he's an eejit, I can certainly handle it for a few hours on a Thursday."

"I think you'll be fine," Ender said. "Selling things is just... selling things, in the end."

Edited 2021-05-21 19:44 (UTC)

Clare nodded. "As long as I don't accidentally order American flags that are pink and purple and have only 30 stars and then try to pretend like 20 states left the United States and only I had heard about it, I think I'm doing alright."

That was a strangely specific example, Clare.

If you want to talk to Ender privately.

idk it's a day.

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Practical Philosophy, Friday

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Talk to the Teacher

OOC