fandomhigh | Ungulate Yoga, Tuesday, period 1

After spending pretty much all day yesterday in bed, after getting back from Ibiza, Duke was looking forward to a nice, ordinary day. Or, you know, as close to one as you could get in Fandom. So when he saw the zebras hanging out in the clearing for class, he didn't even blink.

"At least you all have hooves. Just try not to trample my students, alright?"

The zebras grazed idly, ignoring him.

"Let's get right to warming up please," Duke said when the students arrived. "Today we're going to try out some bound poses." He very specifically did not look at Danny ~~if he was there~~ when he said that. "A bound pose is any pose where your hands are connected, and you twist through your shoulders and torso. They require a fair amount of flexibility, so I don't want to see anyone pushing themselves too hard, here. You need a prop, you use it. I've got pillows, bolsters, blocks and straps up here. Remember: a good stretch means no sharp pains. If it hurts, stop."

One of the zebras came over to try to eat Duke's hair. He closed his eyes and sighed.

"Also there are zebras. So . . . yeah."

At least he wasn't stoned this week.

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Hey, the last time Liam had had a run-in with a cult, he'd left a trail of bodies behind him, so who was he to judge a little roughing-up?

(In his defense, the snake cult had started killing people first. And then they'd made the mistake of kidnapping Verity.)

"Just making sure we're not going to have to hide you in the machinery under the island should anyone come looking for payback," Liam said with a tight smile. "No sign of her?"

He didn't think so, given Saturday morning's radio and also the fact that hopefully, if she had been found, someone would've taken the time to, you know, call him and let him know. But sometimes it didn't hurt to check.

"No," Duke said. "No sign."

Then he frowned.

"Wait, the what under the island?"

“Machinery,” Liam repeated. “Did anyone tell you about last summer?”

"Vampires and evil toys, yeah. What's that got to do with machines in the sewers?"

“Oh, they’re not in the sewers,” Liam said. “But there’s definitely machinery. It controls where the island goes whenever it decides to go on walkabout.”

Yup. This was a thing Liam was saying with a completely straight face. Thanks, Fandom!

Edited 2020-05-27 00:26 (UTC)

"The island. Goes wandering." Duke let out a heavy sigh. "Why am I even still surprised?"

“Apparently the island itself doesn’t usually change with the new location, that was new,” Liam smiled grimly, one thumb pressing in to the red mark in the center of his other palm. “Lucky us.” Be glad you’d missed it, Duke!

"Uh . . . huh. Good to know. And the machinery, what, is the island's engine?"

Liam nodded. “Me and a few other people ended up going down there last summer to try and fix it. Got captured for our trouble.” Of course, it had been fixed and everything returned to normal in the end, but... it hadn’t been a good time.

"Captured. By what, subterranean mutant squirrels?"

"Toy soldiers, actually." Who had technically been the Troopers. "This was the bit with the evil toys."

“Your evil toys were soldiers? Man in the volcano we had to deal with spiders with doll heads and cannibal clowns and shit.”

“Our evil toys were us,” Liam shook his head. “At the beginning of the week, we all woke up brainwashed. Some people- some people snapped out of it earlier than others,” he said. Was he ever going to forgive himself for not being one of the first to come back to themselves?

Survey said no.

Duke was just going to stare at Liam appalled.

Brainwashed. That was like, his worst nightmare. (And yet, it was destined to happen repeatedly in his canon....)

Ungulate Yoga, Tuesday, period 1

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