Abridged Sex Ed, Thursday, Period Three

[magnusrushesin]

Your teachers were just gonna ignore any weirdness going on outside of class unless they could stab it. Then they'd stab the hell out of things.

So, for now they were sort of aggressively clutching at a few pamphlets with titles like 'Your Changing Body' and 'Why Do I Feel This Way?' They totally looked like they were fron the 80's.

"So, today we're gonna talk about The Sex," Magnus said with a totally confident nod.

Cara seemed far too pleased. Be afraid. "Since we can't assume any of you have the slightest clue, we're going to start with the basics."

"We are?" Oh god, he wasn't expected her to go this route.

At least she wasn't going to get into the question of what actually counted as sex? Much. "Generally sex occurs when at least two people decide that one of them is going to stick parts of their anatomy inside the other's." She held up her hands and gestured to demonstrate. "As far as the pamphlets are concerned these parts are a cock and a cunt, but that makes a lot of assumptions."

"Penis and vagina," Magnus added a little frantically. Because he wasn't a cool teacher, okay? He just wasn't. "Yeah, these pamphlets are pretty heteronormative."

Thanks, Travis.

"I mean," he said, doubling down on the gruff Magnus voice. "There can be other combinations of parts."

Cool, skewed idea of what constitutes appropriate, same thing really. "There doesn't even always need to be penetration, sometimes it's more grinding."

Thanks, Cara.

"Sooo, let's watch this sex ed movie from the 80s and point out all the inaccuracies!" Magnus found his own fun here.

Comments

Sign In

[magnusrushesin]

Roll a charisma saving throw! Or maybe wisdom.

Re: Sign In

[cypher_can_fly]

Owen, 12+5 (not wisdom. definitely not wisdom.)

Re: Sign In

[scoffs_at_tradition]

Shuri, 3+1 (ugh.)

Re: Sign In

[thishouseishaunted]

Mae Borowski, 15+1 (did I do that right?)

Re: Sign In

[hashtag_chocobro]

Prompto Argentum, 4+2 (lol)

Watch the Movie

[magnusrushesin]

It was literally an old VHS. God help you all.

Re: Watch the Movie

[scoffs_at_tradition]

"Is this on an actual video tape?" Shuri asked, delighted. "I love antiques!"

Re: Watch the Movie

[thishouseishaunted]

Everything about this class made Mae uncomfortable.

So she was going to draw sarcastic comics about it in her journal.

Re: Watch the Movie

[hashtag_chocobro]

Sure, the fact that he'd missed last week due to being in some sort of rotten-peach-infused dream-world crystal-sphere prison thing didn't take any of the ire and irritation out of Prompto that the boys had signed him up for this class out of, like, all the possible classes.

Seriously. He already had, like, way more experience with all of this than any of them (he was pretty sure, anyway; well, maybe not Gladio, but it's not like he kept tabs on that!), so that's how he knew they were just really being dicks about the whole thing, but he definitely knew what they were snickering about and being butts about the last time he was home.

Plus, sitting there trying to think of ways to enact revenge was a good way to distract himself from the fact that he had to sit there and watch this movie and feel incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassed about all of it.

Talk to the Teachers

[magnusrushesin]

Who could totally teach this class.

OOC

[magnusrushesin]

Uuugh, there are four pies, a cake, and a whole taco bar by my desk.