fandomhigh | RETURN OF THE SHENANIGANS, Wednesday

RETURN OF THE SHENANIGANS, Wednesday

There was no Anakin for the usual Wednesday madness this week. Maybe because he was spending well earned time with his family. Maybe because he was tied up in a closet. Maybe because Deadpool was also now under the Disney MegaCorp umbrella and the monopoly of entertainment was well under way.

"That got kinda dark," Wade said, thinking it over. "Accurate, but dark. Anywho! I'm in charge, so there are gonna be a few changes that won't last past this week. But for this week, I'm a god."

Or something.

"It's maze time because that one hit movie that don't really remember. You know. Boy Katniss. But that's only because there's no Bowie here to make it a different movie. R.I.P."

It might have been the island (it was the island), it might have been Wade being very industrious last night, but there was now a mini laybrinth waiting for everyone to try out. Complete with moderately dangerous traps. No minotaur, though. They were hard to book.

"Now, I know Skywalker likes teams, but this shit? This is a free for all to the prize at the center."

Wade stared at them for a moment before making a shooing motion. "Go. C'mon. Get going. Shoo."

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"The fuck is this thing."

The fuck. Was that thing.

"And why is it singing at me?"

Poor Fjord. Missed all the fish excitement last year.

Iris was absolutely sidling over to Fjord.

"It's the best fish," she said, which wasn't an explanation at all. "It tried to murder us all last year."

And she wanted it.

Iris was being met with such a flat, mildly perplexed look at that.

"The fuck you say it did?"

"Well, maybe not this exact fish," Iris amended, studying the fish intently. "But it's definitely the same sort of fish."

Singing, stuck to a plaque, and all.

It was the greatest fish.

Fjord stared at it for a moment. And then raised an eyebrow a little.

".... Sure."

He wasn't buying it.

Silly man.

"Can I have it?" she asked shamelessly.

There was another long pause as Fjord looked between the fish and the clearly crazy person asking for it.

"... What are you gonna do with it?"

Because if she wasn't full of it, it seemed to him a little like he'd be handing over a dangerous weapon to a stranger or something.

"I'm going to see if I can't wrangle Miguel into helping me make it better," she said, both honestly and completely making up a story on the spot.

Iris just wanted the fish.

"And then probably see what sort of beasties we can train it to take out?"

'Beasties' covered an awful lot of ground, mind.

"You want... the singing mechanical fish thing... as... a pet?"

Fjord was judging you so hard, Iris.

At least in part because he thought pets were dumb, granted.

Iris paused.

"Desperately," she assured him.

Judge away, Fjord! JUDGE AWAY.

Fjord considered that. Considered the other stream of losers just trickling on in. And then shrugged.

"Whatever," he replied. "Let me lord my victory over people until the crowd starts to disperse, and then you can do whatever the hell you want to with this thing."

Fenris hated fish anyway.

You'd made a terrible, terrible mistake, Fjord!

A terrible one.

Iris beamed at him.

"Lord away," she said, content now that the fish would be hers. "Wouldn't want to ruin your victory anyway."

Fjord shrugged his shoulders dismissively.

"Don't have anywhere to put it anyway."

He lived in a hotel room. Honestly, now. He wouldn't even get his bag of holding until the whole Sour Nest debacle.

Iris considered that.

"I'll probably keep it in my pockets," she admitted.

Since, well, her pockets held all the things.

There was a long pause at that. Fjord considered the pocket situation.

And then nodded. Probably some sort of otherdimensional storage space deal. They had those back home, too. Mostly he was curious how she'd get it in there in the first place.

"Stretchy pocket seams, huh?"

Re: Celebrate Your Victory!

intraspective - 2019-07-03 15:33 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Celebrate Your Victory!

built_fjord_tough - 2019-07-03 16:16 (UTC) - Expand

Coming out of the maze second, only to find Fjord had gotten there first and discovering exactly what the prize actually was, she definitely felt she had an obligation to throw in ~~but will try her damnest not to mess up the other thread~~, "Zounds, Fjord, whatever you decide to do with that thing....don't. Just leave it alone. Just shove it in a closet if you have to to...but just...leave it alone."

It had to mean something if Amaya Blackstone was telling you to not go messing around with a weird little device, right? Right??

"Why do I get the feeling I've just been handed some sort of dangerous weapon I don't completely comprehend?"

This would be the story of his life, really.

"Because you have been, Fjord," said Amaya, dryly, cryptically, brows disappearing into her bangs as she lifted them. "Because you have. But just don't go poking at it or trying to do anything to it, and you should be fine."

She had to admit, though, she was sure feeling glad someone else had walked on out of that maze before she did right now.

"Pretty sure I can handle that," Fjord replied.

He was going to immediately hand this thing off on Iris as soon as the crowd started to thin out. Because he had a fantastic wisdom stat.

"Seems like a lot of power for one guy, though."

"Oh," said Amaya, nodding, and looking Very Serious about it, too, "but you've earned it, Fjord. By being slightly better at finding your way around a maze than others."

There was a slight pause.

"Honestly, though," she added, a bit more serious and considering now, "based on what was done to earn that fish last year, that's right about par for the course."

"... Don't suppose any of that stuff was comparable to what's been goin' on this year so far?"

Really, nothing to brag about with a side of Gremlin Drag?

Amaya took a moment to think back and really consider some of the previous summers' activities compared to this years' activities.

"Just about the same, really," Amaya admitted, "only there was a bit more of a competitive spirit going around last year with the fish being passed around as a prize, either by people who didn't want anything to do with it actively trying to not win and people who were sort of itching to have their turn at it aiming to get it. And a few folks, I believe, who actually wanted to win because they genuinely liked the thing, but how anyone could feel that way was beyond me. Of course, none of us knew back then exactly what we were even dealing with, so I wasn't surprised to see them sort of chuck the prize idea right out the window for this year...until, well, this one."

She gave Fjord the sort of smile you gave someone when you said one thing, but what you really meant was generally I am so, so sorry, complete with a pat on his shoulder that might have otherwise seemed encouraging instead of...consiliatory. "So...congratulations, there, Fjord, you....lucky son a biscuit, you."

"... I'm so proud."

How had he managed to deliver that in such a complete deadpan, anyway?

"Well, at least it won't be an issue again come next week."

Or come the moment he shoved the thing at Iris, really.

"And just think!" said Amaya, brightly now. "If you'd have only been a mite bit slower or less efficient isn't, it wouldn't have even been your problem, but mine!"

She was, perhaps, just a wee bit too pleased with this whole second place thing, and not just because it was going to just eat Diaz up inside, either!

"So I guess I owe you a thanks in there, too."

"Well, I do what I can," Fjord replied, wryly. "Any day my winnin' can make your life a little easier, Amaya, I'll be happy to kick everybody's ass as menial tasks."

... Like navigating a trap-filled maze. Like that.

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