fandomhigh | Pokémon Going, Wednesday - First Period (1/17/2017)

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Pokémon Going, Wednesday - First Period (1/17/2017)

The the classroom today there was a poorly written 'Your Buddy' on the board. And there might have been a Pokémon drawn next to it. Or a dick.

Odds are on it being a dick.

"Today we're gonna make sure none of you pick some lame ass buddy to walk with," Deadpool said. "Because that lil' guy is going to be right next to the portrait of you. Or someone who looks like you if you were an anime character. Who wasn't green or an alien."

He was being inclusive here.

"Look closely at all the Pokémon you've caught so far. It's probably a ton of Pidgeys and Rattattas, but maybe you have something decent in there. But then, we're technically on the coast despite how much I feel like I'm in the Midwestern suburbs for some reason. Weird. But there might be more water type around in that case. Anyway, pick one and share with the class so we can judge you. As a group."

Just that easy! Wasn't it such a fun class?

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With a buddy!

And then get judged.

Who was drawing another Pokémon/dick. Because why not?

Right now my buddy is a Bulbasaur, but I'll swap him out for that worthless piece of shit Magikarp.

Peridot

Magikarp has been my buddy since the buddy system rolled out, except for that 10K stretch where I wanted to see if Pikachu really does perch on your shoulder if you walk with it enough. (It does. It's cute.)

I'm only basically a hike from here to America and back away from a Gyarados. My buddy, Buddy, is gonna be my buddy forever.

NO ONE TOLD ME PIKACHU DOES THIS. OH GOD, I HAVE A NEED.

After great consideration (and a lot of scrolling up and down past her vast selection of pidgeys and rattatas), Peridot settled on the only buddy she really could settle on.

"Geodude is clearly the sturdiest choice for vast amounts of travel," she decided. Because she hadn't caught an Onyx. "It will suffice."

Her non-organic life-form bias was showing.

10K WITH PIKACHU AS A BUDDY.

I think Eevee, Pidgey, Spearow, Caterpie, and Weedle also do this, without the 10K trek. But you gotta EARN your Pika-love.

As soon I get one more Bulbasaur candy, I'm trying with Vulpix.

"Yeah, but he's a creepy ball with arms. That sort of shit haunts my dreams," Deadpool replied.

I think Vulpix is too big-- lots of tail that'll clip through your head. But oh man, if it works, let me know. I wanna shoulderfox.

"... You dream about balls with arms?"

Peridot had never in her life had a dream, so this was more curiosity speaking than a judgment.

"Yes. Yes, I do." Balls everywhere. Mostly the face.

Edited 2017-01-18 20:29 (UTC)

Anders

"I like Tauros," Anders reflected, scrolling to the bull-lion hybrid. "He looks strong, doesn't he?"

I have a Metapod because I'm stuck at 46 candies and I can't get enough to evolve the stupid green worm and for some reason this matters to me.

It was Ponytea, but I finally evolved that one Monday. SO PRETTY.

Peridot gave this question a moment of careful consideration.

"It is significantly larger than my Geodude," she allowed, looking between her screen and his. "And size is often indicative of strength and rarity..."

Well, now she was kind of envying that Tauros, there.

"Where did you find it?"

"On a trip to Baltimore," Anders said, passing the phone to Peridot if she wanted a better look. "Strongest one I have, and not bad-looking either."

He tilted his head to see the Geodude. "I haven't found that one yet," he admitted. "I like the fists."

Peridot made a reach for Anders' phone, and held up her own in turn, in case he wanted a better look, too.

"There are plenty out on the cliffs," she shared, "where everything goes to rocks."

The rocky bits, Peridot.

"What's Baltimore like?" She leaned in to inspect the Tauros, deciding that she was quite impressed by it. "Oh, this one is strong."

PONYTA. I should work on evolving mine. Fire type are so hard to find around me.

See, there's this park by my house that usually has one unusual (or at least, Not Fucking Rattata) Pokemon hanging around. One week it had Ponytea like four days in a row.

Right now it's on Scyther, which is cool-looking?

Lucky! My work parking lot randomly gets water type in it. Today I caught two Seels.

I'm a professional adult. Catching pokemon at work.

Anders accepted hers, looking at the figure. "It's a lot bigger than here," he said. "Busier, too. Tons of tall buildings and people and cars, and there's a pretty harbor."

He tapped the Geodude with a fingertip and added, "I need to climb out n the cliffs and collect some of these."

No lie, one of the happiest days of my work life was when I went to a conference in a hotel with a couple Pokestops in/near it. I caught like eight things that day.

I'm so, so professional.

"Cars," Peridot mused. "I think I've seen cars. I haven't been to an Earth city, yet, though. Not much deeper in than the very outskirts."

Peridot's understanding of Earth was still very much a work in progress.

"The cliffs also have the ones called Ponyta, there," she offered. "The quadrupedal creatures with the fire. I have one of those, as well."

But clearly it was inferior to the ones made of stone. Clearly.

Eevee does do this! No 10k required!

I've had Eevee and Ponyta, but now it's Magikarp. At least the constant flopping around is funny?

I was super mad there's no pokestops in walking distance from my work. But now they're at all the Starbucks, so I am just forced to go there on occasion.

Dante

"It's probably a lot like cities wherever you're from," Anders mused, giving the girl back her phone. "Big. Noisy. Sometimes sort of smelly."

A beat. "That is, if where you're from has cities."

"Sort of," Peridot replied, holding his phone back up to him as well. "Where I'm from has colonies. Worlds repurposed to suit the needs of my people. Very big, and sometimes noisy."

A pause.

"Not necessarily very smelly, though. Some of our colonies don't even have air."

Ahsoka Tano

"Well, there's this weird tooka..."

That was a Meowth, Ahsoka.

"Is that what kids are calling it these days?" Deadpool asked, admiring his poorly drawn dick.

"If it's furry and has claws, sure."

Look, it was the concept of her having sex that had her brain screeching to an awkward halt. Dick jokes were completely different.

"...that is a terrifying thought," Deadpool admitted. "Sort of into it, but mostly frightened."

"No air?" Anders said, finishing the phone trade. "So you don't need to breathe?"

Anders had figured out Peridot wasn't From Here, but not needing oxygen hadn't really occurred to him.

"Or eat, or sleep," Peridot confirmed, shrugging her shoulders. "A lot of what you humans do as part of your day-to-day existences still often confuses me."

Or outright disgusted her, but she had at least learned enough tact to not say that one outright to humans she hardly knew.

"So what do you do all night?" Anders wondered. "If sleep is out, and eating is too, and here's no one to talk to."

"Explore the island," Peridot replied, shrugging. "Build things, take apart earth tech to see what makes it work. Go to the library and read. That sort of thing."

She was going to just leave out the 'spend hours on end in front of the television watching Camp Pining Hearts reruns' part.

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Pokémon Going, Wednesday - First Period (1/17/2017)

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