Avoiding Dealing With Your Problems, 1st Period - Friday 9/2

[captainskullpoopl]

There was no teacher in the room by the time class was scheduled to start. No, it was about ten minutes after the fact that Deadpool came wandering on on with a pumpkin spice latte. Because it was fall, motherfuckers. According to Starbucks, at least.

"Hey, you're still here. Maybe. Who knows if you waited or not," he said cheerfully. "Oh, different mediums. You make my jokes hard. And that is what she said."

He put the latte down to give himself a high five for that.

"Anyway, I was mostly hoping to find an empty classroom because, let's be honest here, I am absolute shit at teacher. Great in the box office and the bedroom, bad at teaching. I made my point in the same sentence. It's just eerie, isn't it?" he asked, taking a seat on the edge of the desk. His teachin' desk. "But, you know what they say... 'Never trust a Serbian with your money' and here I am. Teaching you kids because I didn't listen to it. Moral of the story: teach what you love."

How the hell was that the moral?

"It just is. Anyway, this class is about ignoring your problems. Something I'm a bit of an expert at. We should probably do introductions, but to be honest, I'll just end up calling you whatever nickname I feel like. So, yeah. What's your name and favorite way to ignore your existential angst?"

Comments

Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

If you stuck around, that is. And no, he didn't bring lattes for any of you. There wasn't even a Starbucks on island, guys. This was a trip.

Re: Introduce Yourself

[rebelseekspizza]

"I'm Dante," Dante said, tilting his head at the guy.

And his freaky-ass body condom.

"And I'm gonna go with 'get laid'."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

Excuse you, it was a stylish body condom.

"Oooh, I like that one, cautionary-tale-on-Lifetime."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[rebelseekspizza]

"You watch Lifetime?" Dante asked, tilting his head. "That's just sad."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[notouchykuzco.livejournal.com]

"I'm Kuzco, and I'm not really much for angst," he said.

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

"Oh my god, David Spade!" Deadpool said, completely ignoring the lack of angst for now. Forever. It was forever. "I haven't thought about you in forever. Is he alive still?"

Yeah, he was pulling out his phone to check. "Is... David... Spade... dead... huh. Still alive. Good for him."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[notouchykuzco.livejournal.com]

"....yay?" Kuzco replied. "Wow. I thought the talking dog was going to be the weirdest part of my week."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[thewrathofkaan]

"Roscoe," Roscoe said, waving at the teacher. "Probably drinking."

Uh oh, that wasn't healthy at all!

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

"Yeah, but what do you drink? Because if it's shitty, we have a whole new level of sad to go with budding alcoholism." Because he had standards. Not really. But he could pretend.

Re: Introduce Yourself

[thewrathofkaan]

Roscoe liked this guy. Sorry, Negasonic. "Few months ago I mixed a single-malt with Hawaiian punch," he shared. "It sounds disgusting but it was pretty good."

No, it was genuinely disgusting.

Re: Introduce Yourself

[good_for_six]

"Isabela. Wine, women, and song of course."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

"Oh my god, no one told me I had a saucy pirate wench in my class," Deadpool said eagerly. "I would've broken out the eyepatch!"

Re: Introduce Yourself

[good_for_six]

...

"...that would've been something."

...would he wear it over the mask?

RE: Introduce Yourself

[teenagewarhead.livejournal.com]

"Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Let's just go with mean comments."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

"You forgot about sullen silences," Deadpool pointed out. Then stage whispered, "I'm so glad you're in my class."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[teenagewarhead.livejournal.com]

She responded to that with an eyeroll. And a sullen silence.

Re: Introduce Yourself

[spell_chucker]

How did he end up with the strangest teachers the school had to offer?

"I'm Khadgar," he said, "and I... I read, I suppose."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

"I'm calling you Nic Cage instead in the hopes you come up with a more fun coping mechanism," Deadpool said, pointing right at him. "Maybe theft of national treasures. Oh, I said it."

Re: Introduce Yourself

[spell_chucker]

Khadgar was quiet for a moment before asking, "What would I get out of stealing a national treasure? Besides time in whatever prisons you all have here?"

If he was going to be stuck here for a while, there was no harm in humoring his teachers, right?

Re: Introduce Yourself

[yogurtvore]

"I'm Blue Sargent," Blue said, "and, I dunno, I usually work?"

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

"Work? Really?" Deadpool gave her a look and sighed. The look was mostly negated by the mask, but whatever. "You can do better than that, Color-blocked."

RE: Introduce Yourself

[halfaclink.livejournal.com]

"Frank Doyle," Frank said before raising his answer and then downing it.

Re: Introduce Yourself

[captainskullpoopl]

"This kid right here gets it!" In case the class was wondering if that was okay.

RE: Re: Introduce Yourself

[halfaclink.livejournal.com]

"I try. And more importantly, I succeed!" Frank said, pouring another drink for himself, and filling a second glass just in case anyone else might want one.

Some people brought apples. Frank might bring hard apple cider. This time it was scotch, though.

RE: Introduce Yourself

[notamascot]

"I'm Kaylin Neya and i have no idea what exi-something angs is," she said, watching him a little carefully. "So I don't know how is avoid it. Take a different hallway maybe?"