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fandomhigh2016-03-31 11:23 am
vdistinctive) wrote in fandomhigh2016-03-31 11:23 am
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Oh the Humanity!: Friendship is International Adventure, Thursday, period 1
The class had been handwavily notified this week to come dressed for a warm, wet hike. Pinkie, for one, was wearing a cliche bright yellow raincoat, hat, and galoshes. Eliot was more traditionally decked out in waterproof hiking boots and a lightweight, rain-proof jacket. They had extras in case any of the students didn't get the message or were otherwise ill-prepared.
"Guess what, everypony?" Pinkie enthused when everyone was gathered and properly attired. "This week we're going to one of the most exotic places on this whole planet!"
"Unless you're actually from a tropical rainforest," Eliot pointed out. "Then it ain't exotic at all."
"It's so neat that they've even got their very own division of disease research!"
"We've got bug spray," Eliot noted. "I don't want anyone coming home with zika. Or malaria." Malaria sucked ass.
"There are fish there that eat people!"
"Which is why we're not going in the water," Eliot said.
"And big hungry jungle cats!"
"Actually, jaguars are relatively small compared to lions or tigers."
"And adorable giant river otters!"
"That can take out the caymans."
"And man eating sloths!"
Eliot shook his head. "Ain't even a thing."
"Then why do they have such large claws?"
The portal opened up behind them, which was good because Eliot had no idea how to respond to that. Instead, he gestured for Pinkie to the lead the way into the jungle.
"We're meeting a professional guide there. I know we usually let you all have some free reign on these trips, but this time, I gotta ask y'all to not wander off. Pinkie ain't got a firm grasp on reality, but the Amazon is not a place to fuck around." He smiled despite his hard tone. "It's just also not one to be missed, if ya can help it."
"Guess what, everypony?" Pinkie enthused when everyone was gathered and properly attired. "This week we're going to one of the most exotic places on this whole planet!"
"Unless you're actually from a tropical rainforest," Eliot pointed out. "Then it ain't exotic at all."
"It's so neat that they've even got their very own division of disease research!"
"We've got bug spray," Eliot noted. "I don't want anyone coming home with zika. Or malaria." Malaria sucked ass.
"There are fish there that eat people!"
"Which is why we're not going in the water," Eliot said.
"And big hungry jungle cats!"
"Actually, jaguars are relatively small compared to lions or tigers."
"And adorable giant river otters!"
"That can take out the caymans."
"And man eating sloths!"
Eliot shook his head. "Ain't even a thing."
"Then why do they have such large claws?"
The portal opened up behind them, which was good because Eliot had no idea how to respond to that. Instead, he gestured for Pinkie to the lead the way into the jungle.
"We're meeting a professional guide there. I know we usually let you all have some free reign on these trips, but this time, I gotta ask y'all to not wander off. Pinkie ain't got a firm grasp on reality, but the Amazon is not a place to fuck around." He smiled despite his hard tone. "It's just also not one to be missed, if ya can help it."
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