Didi (Death of the Endless) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
living_endless) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2015-12-04 01:27 pm
living_endless) wrote in fandomhigh2015-12-04 01:27 pm
Entry tags:
Philosophy of Loss, Friday, 2nd Period
The classroom was normal today, beanbag chairs and all, and Didi had decided she didn't mind the holiday lights. They were festive.
"Hey," she said easily, as the students gathered. "Today we're talking about mourning fashion. Different cultures have different rituals, of course. For example, in India mourners wear white, and white was the color of mourning in Europe as well through medieval times. But the more typical color in Western societies is black."
She paused for a wry grin down at her own outfit.
"Now, these days, plenty of people wear all black because they like the way it looks, or because it's easy to match, or because it's fashionable. But in Victorian England and America, there were very strict rules around what you wore when you were mourning -- especially if you were a woman. Widows were supposed to wear head-to-toe black crepe for a year, nothing else. Even babies wore crepe armbands.
"After a year and a day, you could wear softer and shinier fabrics, or add some trim to your dresses. And at the end of the second year, you went into what was called 'half-mourning,' which meant you could slowly start introducing white, gray or mauve back into your wardrobe. You weren't supposed to wear ordinary clothes for two and a half years. Meanwhile, men just had to wear an everyday black suit with the black crepe as trim on their hat for the first three months."
"Understandably," she continued, "that kind of extreme mourning -- which only the wealthy could really afford anyhow -- didn't last forever. The tradition slowed around the turn of the century, and by the 1950s the custom had dwindled to six months or a year in black and other dark colors, like navy and deep green. These days, any dark clothing is considered okay for a funeral, and after that people don't wear anything special to show they're in mourning."
She paused there, pushed her hair out of her face. "My question for you is, was there some merit to the Victorian approach? It does take years to process the loss of a loved one. Maybe wearing clothes that let the world know what's going on with you isn't such a bad thing. On the other hand, grief can be immensely personal. Maybe it's better not to have to share it with everybody. What do you think?"
"Hey," she said easily, as the students gathered. "Today we're talking about mourning fashion. Different cultures have different rituals, of course. For example, in India mourners wear white, and white was the color of mourning in Europe as well through medieval times. But the more typical color in Western societies is black."
She paused for a wry grin down at her own outfit.
"Now, these days, plenty of people wear all black because they like the way it looks, or because it's easy to match, or because it's fashionable. But in Victorian England and America, there were very strict rules around what you wore when you were mourning -- especially if you were a woman. Widows were supposed to wear head-to-toe black crepe for a year, nothing else. Even babies wore crepe armbands.
"After a year and a day, you could wear softer and shinier fabrics, or add some trim to your dresses. And at the end of the second year, you went into what was called 'half-mourning,' which meant you could slowly start introducing white, gray or mauve back into your wardrobe. You weren't supposed to wear ordinary clothes for two and a half years. Meanwhile, men just had to wear an everyday black suit with the black crepe as trim on their hat for the first three months."
"Understandably," she continued, "that kind of extreme mourning -- which only the wealthy could really afford anyhow -- didn't last forever. The tradition slowed around the turn of the century, and by the 1950s the custom had dwindled to six months or a year in black and other dark colors, like navy and deep green. These days, any dark clothing is considered okay for a funeral, and after that people don't wear anything special to show they're in mourning."
She paused there, pushed her hair out of her face. "My question for you is, was there some merit to the Victorian approach? It does take years to process the loss of a loved one. Maybe wearing clothes that let the world know what's going on with you isn't such a bad thing. On the other hand, grief can be immensely personal. Maybe it's better not to have to share it with everybody. What do you think?"
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Lecture [12/04]
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She worried at her lip for a moment before adding, "Wearing black as a sign of respect for the dead, I can appreciate. But making that mandatory for years on end... When does it stop being a reminder to those around you and start simply serving as a reminder to yourself that somebody you love is gone? If it helps, then I can respect it. But I don't think I would ever expect anybody to advertise that loss to the world. And the women for so much longer than the men?"
Elsa was from around that era herself, but she was a princess, someday she'd be Queen, and she was pretty decent at sniffing out bullshit. She wasn't too keen on the idea of a tradition that looked as though it mostly existed to punish women for the heinous crime of outliving their husbands.
Re: Discussion [12/04]
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"Now, let's not pay too much attention to anything I just said, lest it pull at the metaphorical loose thread on the sweater and call way too many things into question. Instead, let's remember my tone, shall we? It was very dismissive of the idea of set dress requirements."
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OOC [12/04]