fandomhigh | Outdoor Adventure Time!, Part 2, Tuesday, period 1

Kathy knew that Parker and Eliot preferred to bring their students to real places when they were in charge of their class, but Kathy's best physical skills were kinda dangerous for people who were new to it and/or lacked super-agility (and possibly the ability to bounce). So class was in the Danger Shop today--which at least meant that she could program it to be as awesome a landscape as she wanted.

"Hey guys," she said, waving when the class came in. "So, uhh, Eliot and Parker are, umm, busy with something, so they asked me to cover for them today." For reasons. Reasons she was resolutely not thinking about. "We're going over parkour and freerunning. Both are disciplines all about getting from one place to another efficiently and fast, using only the power of your own body and your surroundings to get there. You can use anything to get from one place to another--climb up walls, leap over roofs, jump from tree-branches and dash across cables. I programmed it so that if you end up falling, the ground is super-bouncy, so you won't get hurt. You might even bounce back up to where you fell from."

She pointed to several various routes that she'd marked with different-colored flags to mark out the difficulty. "Here's a ladder for people who are new at this to climb up to the roof, or if you'd prefer, you can try finding another way up. Uhh, at the end roof, there's snacks for everybody. Real snacks. So, uhh, let's go?"

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Jean Valjean should have had a bad feeling about sending Cosette to Fandom, honestly. If he could ignore that one, then he should have no problem giving this one a pass, too. What was the worst thing that could happen with Kathy and Cosette becoming awesome friends and going freerunning together?

...Hey, how did Cosette feel about dressing up in bright colors and fighting crime? Asking for no reason.

"Town first just because it's better to practice here, too," Kathy said firmly. "You can get seriously hurt if you miss a jump or fall into something even as a pro. Definitely better to practice here, than out in Baltimore."

Beat.

"Err, not that I have any say in what you do, of course," she added quickly. "But it's just a better idea to start where it's easier, you know?"

Hey, it wasn't as if he'd had the chance to observe many good examples of parenting. He was doing his best!

"No, no, I understand," said Cosette -- who would probably be all up for dressing up in bright colors and fighting crime if you pitched it to her as a way to help people. WHICH WAS NOT AN ENDORSEMENT OF THIS IDEA but just saying. "I'd rather avoid getting hurt from the fall, myself. It isn't the same at all as falling into grass, or sand."

Considering Kathy routinely dressed in rainbows to stop muggers, keep people from harassing hookers, chase down robbers who targeted mom and pop stores, and walk drunk people to taxis, that would be exactly how she pitched it.

"And, sadly, I'm not that great at explaining how not to fall," Kathy confessed. "I have an unfair advantage, so it's not a thing I think about. Sorry."

Which would be the best way to sell Cosette on the idea. Uh oh.

"How much can one explain how not to fall, anyhow?" Someone had not taken any self-defense classes here, no. Cosette tilted her head. "What sort of unfair advantage?"

But think of how much fun they could have, coming up with a cool name and costume design!

"Well, you can be taught how to fall safely and people can warn for stuff that's dangerous and has a high likelihood of leading to a fall or something," Kathy said, trying to find a way to explain it well and failing. "And, umm, one of my powers is super-agility? I don't fall. Or, well, I have to work really hard at it. So I'm bad at figuring out what could cause other people to fall."

In that she over-compensated because she didn't want anyone to fall and get hurt.

It would probably be bird-themed.

"Ah! Yes, that makes sense."

Sort of. But she wasn't going to be mean and say otherwise.

"It's funny to think about someone having to work at falling," Cosette admitted with a laugh. "But what a useful skill to have! I'd likely do this sort of thing all the time in your place."

They didn't have any bird-themed superheroes in Baltimore, just saying.

"Lady Ghanima had us practice falling in her class to make sure we learned to fall right," Kathy admitted. "And I couldn't do it. I had to literally force myself to fall over and not catch my balance. Because if I don't think about it, my body just does it for me."

Which had made not having it in the Matrix twenty times worse. She'd fallen a million times. Or so it had felt.

"And I do. It's pretty much my main hobby these days. I spend a lot of nights out in Baltimore running around on rooftops."

And fighting crime. Partnerless. It was very sad, Cosette.

Outdoor Adventure Time!, Part 2, Tuesday, period 1

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