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Adventuring!

Once again, class would be held in the Danger Shop. Because there was a Danger Shop and no self-respecting hacker nerd like Hardison would be able to forgive themself for holding a class anywhere but the Danger Shop if that was a possibility. Today, however, when the class opened the door into the Danger Shop, they'd find themselves in a tavern called The Thief and Hitter, a name that made him smile every time he looked at it. Anyone familiar with epic fantasy movies or video games would feel right at home, with the scarred wooden tables, the roaring fire with a pig roasting on a spit, and a thickly-muscled barkeep standing behind a long wooden counter while several pretty ladies (and a few pretty lads, too, Hardison was equal-opportunity) waited tables, bringing over battered metal tankards filled with brown ale and heaping plates of mutton and bowls of stew. If the barkeep looked like the manager of a local diner on one of his surlier days and if one of the blonde serving girls was helping herself to money pouches, well, surely those were coincidental.

There was one empty table remaining that had just the right number of seats for the number of students in class. How fortuitous!

Hardison waited until everyone had taken a seat before speaking up. "Ahh, the tavern," he said, drawing their attention to one of the tall, wingback chairs in front of the fire. He peeked around the side and gave the class a smile. "Traditional starting place of many an adventure. Whether you're a seasoned adventurin' party or ain't even a group yet, the tavern's a great place to get somethin' to eat, swap stories, an' keep an ear out for opportunities for gainful employment. Funny, most of said 'gainful employment' usually involves goin' out into the wilderness somewhere an' riskin' life an' limb to steal stuff from the local green-skinned population, but hey. Them enchanted weapons won't pay for themselves."

Standing up, he moved to join the class at the table, snagging a stool on the way. "So, welcome to Adventurin'! Yes, the exclamation point is part of the class title. If you were hopin' for a class that involved runnin' around in the woods an' jumpin' offa high stuff, that's Outdoor Adventures, run by my crew, Eliot an' Parker. Sorry for the confusion, but they probably got room for you if you wanna sign up late or whatever. This class ain't about hikin' an' explorin' the great outdoors. It's about discoverin' the five great adventure game archetypes an' figurin' out which one suits you best, occasionally while usin' your various skills to get past obstacles." And they wouldn't all be various fights, though Hardison wasn't going to share that just yet.

"But today is for introductions. Now, about half'a you know me--an' welcome back--but for those of you who don't, my name is Hardison. Don't worry about callin' me Mr. or Professor or none of that, just Hardison'll do. This is Raven," he added, gesturing to her seat at the table. "She's my TA for the semester. Now, from alla you, what I'd like is your name an' grade, why you signed up for this class, an' how much experience you have with epic fantasy media, of any variety. Books, movies, video games, RPGs, whatever, you name it. If you can, feel free to tell me your favorite character class an' why. If you ain't sure what I mean about classes, just tell me your favorite character from any media an' what it is you like about 'em--specifically, what they do that's so cool. That make sense?"

Just as the last of the introductions and explanations were over, a stout, well-armored dwarf woman reached down to her belt for her money pouch, only to discover it missing. "Thief!" she shouted, pointed to the man next to her, and took a swing. Within seconds the entire tavern was engulfed in a brawl. The only spot of relative calm was around the table of students. "Uh-oh," Hardison said, though he was grinning. "Looks like there's a big fight between y'all and the exit. Looks like you need to find a way to get outta here, whether you wanna fight your way out, sneak out, or find another way. Good luck!"

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"I'd like your name an' grade, why you signed up for this class, an' how much experience you have with epic fantasy media, of any variety. Books, movies, video games, RPGs, whatever, you name it. If you can, feel free to tell me your favorite character class an' why. If you ain't sure what I mean about classes, just tell me your favorite character from any media an' what it is you like about 'em--specifically, what they do that's so cool. That make sense?"

Alluka bounced in her seat when it was her turn. She had a stuffed giraffe in her arms and while she looked about fourteen, her expression was somehow... younger.

"Hi, hi!" she said happily. "I'm Alluka Zoldyck and I think I'm a freshman and I signed up for this because I saw the word adventure and thought it'd be like the other class." Well, at least she was honest? She beamed at the class. "But, but I'm in that one too, and that means that this one is just going to be even more of an adventure because I get to learn a new thing anyway!"

So, yeah, Alluka was totally pumped about being here.

"And I like princess stories! But I especially like the ones where the princesses are pretty and clever too. Some princesses are pretty silly."

Though she liked those ones too. Shhhh.

Yeah, so Hardison had not been prepared for either a stuffed animal or this kind of bouncy, childish enthusiasm. But never let it be said that he couldn't rally, as a moment later he was pulling on a happy smile to give her back.

"Hello, Alluka," he said. "An' welcome to my class. Always cool to get new faces an' I'm sure Parker an' Eliot'll be pleased to hear how much you like their class." Because of course Hardison was going to tell them! "An' there will be plenty of opportunities for learnin' an' adventure an'--" He made an educated guess about what Alluka would get excited over "--costumin' opportunities."

Good call!

Her eyes went huge.

"We're going to get to dress up?!"

Part of running a good grift was knowing what the mark wanted. Teaching wasn't all that different in that respect. "Yup," Hardison said proudly. "It's gonna look like a Renn Faire threw up in here most weeks."

...Their teacher might be looking forward to that part, too. Shh! Don't tell.

"So what is it about princesses that you like best?" he asked. "Better'n any other character there is?"

Alluka had utterly zero idea of what a Renn Faire was but if it meant costumes then it was probably okay if it threw up in the class.

She squished her giraffe tightly and thought about his questions.

"They get the prettiest clothes," she said, after a moment, "and they get the happiest endings 'cause things almost always work out for princesses, even if they're bad. And... and because most of them start off not being allowed to do things but then get to."

And Alluka projected her own feelings all over that, though she didn't actually know that was what it was called.

RE: Re: Introductions

geniuswithasmartphone - 2015-06-30 21:43 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Introductions

that_oldsaying - 2015-07-01 10:57 (UTC) - Expand

RE: Re: Introductions

geniuswithasmartphone - 2015-07-03 06:42 (UTC) - Expand

"I'm Raven, like Hardison said." Raven waved and smiled at the rest of the class. "Honestly I'm mostly here because being a TA for him last session was a lot of fun. I'm still not totally up on the epic fantasy stuff he's talking about. So if you're unfamiliar with it, like me, just know you will definitely be challenged and entertained, so just chill and go with it." What? Odds were good there were other non-nerds around. "As for character types. . . . I like spies." No one who knew her was surprised. "Sneaking around and blending in to your environment come pretty naturally to me, and really, who can't identify with trying to pretend to be someone you're not to survive?"

"I know I ain't surprised," Hardison said with a laugh. "I'm really lookin' forward to your reaction to the rogue module I'm plannin'." And if he ever introduced her to the D&D mimics, no one would ever be safe again.

"Now, when you say you ain't up on most epic fantasy stuff, is it just somethin' you ain't much into, or you just never had a chance, or...?" Hardison knew that the fifties were considered a golden age for pulp fiction and sci-fi, but he wasn't entirely certain when the fantasy boom started. On the other hand, he was pretty sure that Tolkien, Lewis, and T. H. White had been published by Raven's time, so at least the foundations were there.

Raven shrugged. "I liked fairy tales when I was little, and I like ghost stories and old castle romances and intrigues and things like that. Charles tried to get me to read of some Tolkien's stuff but I couldn't really get into it. I've lived in holes in the ground; they're not that charming."

Someone never got out of the shire in her reading, no.

"I really liked Mervyn Peake's books, though. I used to go crawling around up in the eaves back home, looking for secret attics and passageways."

Had Raven mentioned to you that she grew up in a castle yet, Hardison? Okay, so technically it was an English manor styled mansion, but it was totally really a goddamn castle.

No, funny, Raven had neglected to mention that!

...He must never tell Parker, or she'd find some way to get them to go back in time and rob the Xaviers blind.

"Yo, for extra credit, I'mma totally make you watch the first Lord of the Bracelets movie," Hardison declared. "Won't help you much for class, even though Wizards of the Coast pretty much stole everything from Tolkien at least for first edition, but it should be mandatory viewin' for damn near everybody."

Raven looked pretty put out at the idea of homework over the summer, but nodded anyway. "Fine," she said. "But I'm not going to pretend to like it if I don't."

That really wouldn't end up being a problem. She'd skipped over all the stuff that had been copying it for the last 60 years, after all, and hadn't gotten around to the stuff it was copying, so it wouldn't even be old hat to her.

"Do they have a movie of the Gormenghast books, too?"

RE: Re: Introductions

geniuswithasmartphone - 2015-06-30 21:29 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Introductions

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RE: Re: Introductions

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Re: Introductions

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RE: Re: Introductions

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Re: Introductions

tigerundercover - 2015-07-03 15:07 (UTC) - Expand

"Hi." Tali waved a hand. "I'm Tali, and I guess I'm a junior according to your system. I was never really much of a fantasy person growing up --" because she was an unabashed fan of romance dramas -- "but I tried a little bit of Galaxy of Fantasy for a while. It's based on turian mythology, and you play it over the extranet -- there are around 11 billion players, I think. It was fun, but way more time than I have to spare. As for character types . . . hmm."

She tapped a finger against her mask filters, tilting her head.

"I'm pretty fond of the ones who can fight their way out of a situation if they have to, but are just as good at thinking their way out of it." She paused and chuckled. "And do both, more or less."

"Welcome back, Tali," Hardison said, giving her a smile. "Glad to see you decided to come back. A'ight so I wanna know two things: what made you sign up for this class an' can I get a copy of this Galaxy of Fantasy game you mentioned?"

Playing a futuristic alien RPG? That would make him undisputed god-king of nerds everywhere.

"Oh, an' just so you know? Anytime you're in class an' we're in the Danger Shop--" which would be always because why would he ever leave this wonderful room? "--there's always gonna be dextro-based food 'n drink for you. Cool?"

No student of Hardison's was going to have to go without food or drink because of dietary restrictions!

"You're the best teacher ever," Tali blurted out, genuinely pleased by the consideration; she didn't tend to expect that of most people. "And last term's class was fun, that's why I'm back."

Yes, fun. Or possibly practice, what with the whole inevitable but delayed apocalypse situation. Or both. Definitely both.

"And I could probably arrange to get you a copy," she added; somehow she'd had a feeling he might be interested in, oh, an alien MMORPG from the future. Who knew?

Oh yeah. He was definitely going home to crow about being the 'best teacher ever'. It would be days before Parker or Eliot would be able to get him to shut up about it. Look what you had done, Tali.

"Yo, I can definitely respect that kind of character," Hardison said. "Somewhere between the Trickster figure an' the loveable rogue? Always got a smart comment an' a good plan, but when all the chips are down, can handle a little bit of violence to get free? The kind that ain't never gonna leave their crew behind?"

He was dating both sides of that character.

Re: Introductions

goforthe_optics - 2015-06-30 22:27 (UTC) - Expand

RE: Re: Introductions

geniuswithasmartphone - 2015-07-01 06:06 (UTC) - Expand

Kaylin didn't understand most of what this guy was saying. Fantasy? Character Class? Media? Okay, she understood books and knew that movies were like what they showed on that talking picture box, but she didn't actually watch that thing usually.

Which might explain why she looked slightly panicked at trying to answer his questions. Ordinarily she might not have cared so much, but she really liked Parker and Eliot.

"I'm Kaylin Neya and I'll be a sopha-thing this year." Yeah, she couldn't remember what it was called, whatever. "I... have no idea what any of the other things are that you want to know. Except books, but I don't really read very well. And movies, which I think are what they show on that box thing? But I don't really watch that either. Oh, and somebody else signed me up for the class."

And then she felt kind of embarrassed for being so dumb, so she offered, "I like it here, though. It's a lot like home. Except without the bar fights."

Yet.

Edited 2015-06-30 19:38 (UTC)

Yet.

But rather than looking appalled or offended by Kaylin's bluntness, Hardison just laughed a little. "No worries, Kaylin, I ain't about to be offended because you didn't sign up for my class personally. No hard feelings, yo. It just means I get to personally introduce you to some amazin' stuff. That's what any teacher really wants."

He tilted his head at her. "I know you said you can't read real well--but do you know stories? Hear any growin' up?"

There'd be no judgment here about her childhood. Hardison knew what it was like, growing up rough.

Really? Teachers here were different from back home. There they wanted to make you learn dumb things they thought were important for nobody knew why.

She frowned considering. "You mean like stories about the Dragon Emperor and how he rules Elantra or about the fieflords?"

Oh, he was 100% going to want to get her to work on her reading. But everything else? That was all details.

"Maybe?" Hardison shrugged. "I ain't heard them to be able to say. Any of those stories deal with heroes overcomin' obstacles to save the day or anythin'? Are they cautionary tales, or stories meant to entertain an' inspire?"

Re: Introductions

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RE: Re: Introductions

geniuswithasmartphone - 2015-07-03 06:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Re: Introductions

notamascot - 2015-07-04 01:08 (UTC) - Expand

"Um, I'm Kira, and I'm a junior. I signed up for this class because it sounded different than other classes I've taken before," she said. "I've read a lot of fantasy books and I love those kinds of movies, but my video game knowledge is probably lacking. As for characters, I like sneaky fighters. One minute, you think you're by yourself and then bam, there's someone with a knife to your side." She laughed, blushing a little. "That just seems fun to me."

"A'ight, another geek!" Hardison held his fist out for a bump. "So, we got two rogues in the class, at least. Remember--backstab does triple damage, an' if you got a coupla rogues with you, someone is always behind the guy who needs a stabbin'."

Hardison was partial to rogues as well. Three guesses why.

"I'm Hanna, I'm a junior. I signed up because I enjoyed your last class," Hanna shared with a small smile. "Um. I like superhero movies?" she said, a little worried. "I haven't much experience with ... fantasy media. I like Brown Recluse?" She paused and added, "Because she is an amazing fighter and much more sensible than everyone else in those movies."

"Glad to hear you enjoyed it, Hanna," Hardison said, tipping her a wink. "An' superhero movies kinda grew outta fantasy an' sci-fi, so they're in the same family. Close enough. An' Brown Recluse? Good choice."

She reminded Hardison of Parker in certain ways. Mostly in how she moved. Because--damn.

...Not that he'd be sharing those thoughts.

"I'm more a fan of Ferrite Guy myself." Hardison? Identifying with the brilliant scientist and inventor? Shocking! "But, yeah, he can't hold a candle to Brown Recluse in either fightin' or sense. Why are those so important to you?"

"Because-- I know how hard it is to learn the fighting. And I have advantages. And she does not." Hanna bit her lip. "And sometimes I think I do not have sense, at least, I do not have knowledge enough to know when I am having sense. Or just doing the best I can."

"Girl, according to Eliot, I ain't got the sense to come in outta the rain, so I feel ya there." Of course, Hardison wouldn't actually be out in the rain because why be outside? Inside was where the wi-fi was! But anyway, the point stood. "You don't think she'd be cooler with powers or whatever?"