angelo_wings: ([df] power rising)
Rinoa Heartilly ([personal profile] angelo_wings) wrote in [community profile] fandomhigh2015-01-23 12:18 pm
Entry tags:

Powers, Identity, and The World; Embracing the Real You - Friday, Period One

Today when students entered the classroom, they'd probably be hard-pressed to miss the fact that one of their teachers appeared to be… well… on fire. The other, meanwhile, had accessorized her usual casual look with a gigantic pair of white, fluffy wings, extending from the middle of her back.

Neither seemed to look particularly bothered by this state of affairs. In fact, Jono was leaning back against the desk at the front of the room with his arms crossed in front of himself, ignoring the way the flames flicked up around them, same as he always did but with bonus fire. Rinoa was slightly more keyed up than her usual, a low thrum of excitement hanging around her, but that was subtle enough that it could be easily missed.

//What do you see, looking at us right now?// Jono took a moment to look at his students through the flame, eyes a pure white, fire tousling his hair as it crackled around himself. //No doubt, you're all thinking something different, something that relates to your own biases and experiences. Some might have a knee-jerk reaction, looking at myself and Rinoa, perhaps they'd think me to be a monster, and her an angel. Others might see her as the Sorceress, something to be feared, and me as something hollowed out and burning, to be pitied. I imagine there are at least a few of you who are looking at us right now and wondering how in the world we can stand to be here, showing what sets us so blatantly apart from humanity, without any sort of concern, or even any shame. Or maybe we're role models right now, embracing what we are and showing it off without fear.// He shrugged his shoulders. //Of course, given the past two weeks of classes, you all already know that these aren't the faces we usually present. I can't hide my voice, but I can sure as hell hide the fire. And Rinoa doesn't generally go walking around with her wings in view, though she very easily could.//

“The wings are part of how my power manifests,” Rinoa explained, pleased that her voice was steady. It had taken her years to master letting the wings out without giving herself fully over; she had a touch more magic flowing through her than usual, but she could handle that easily. Old hat. “The fire is part of Jono’s. Jono’s fire is permanent, while my wings only appear when I’m channeling more of my magic than just background noise. That means it’s easier for me to blend in. He can’t skip bundling up, but I can hold the wings in and look just like anyone else.”

Rinoa waved a hand dismissively. “We’re going to talk about when and how to blend in in a later class, as well as when and how to truly stand out. Both of those have their advantages. But this week isn’t about us: it’s about you. Maybe you look exactly like everyone else, and whatever makes you different is only internal. Maybe it’s easy to cover your differences, with a coat or long sleeves. The point is, you choose every day how to display yourself to others around you -- what to let them see, or not see.”

//Bear in mind that there are those who don't have any choice in how they present to others,// Jono noted, //at least to a certain extent. I've had people spit in my face before and worse, doesn't matter if I kept my head down. I spent a decent bit of time with blue skin… also not exactly simple to hide, for most. But in spite of how I looked at a glance, it was still up to me to determine how I interacted with those around me. More importantly, it was up to me to determine how I saw myself, if I was going to let other people's reactions to my powers define me, as a person. For a while, it did. And I was bloody miserable because of it.//

Rinoa was going to reach over and put a sympathetic hand on Jono’s back. Those had not been the best of days, no.

“It’s a choice,” Rinoa said. “Life is all about choices. What you let people see, and what you hide. That isn’t even just about powers. Sometimes we don’t let people see some of our vulnerabilities, our weaknesses, our secret selves. We all have labels: daughter, brother, friend, student, teacher, artist, reader, soldier, athlete. People see us through that one lens, but that’s only one side of who we really are. The way they see us affects us, shapes who we are around them, but it can’t ever define us, not unless we let it.”

She smiled in what she hoped was a reassuring manner. “So first off: if any of you feel like showing off, airing out a little bit of what you don’t let other classes see? Feel free. Then, second, let’s talk about perception -- how people see you, and what they don’t always see underneath.”

//Remember, respect and comfort are our two biggest rules, here. Respect anything that people might show you here in class today, and no treating your classmates as 'other.' We're all equals here. Respect your own selves, too. You might perceive yourselves as lesser because of what sets you apart, but I promise you, you all deserve to be appreciated for who you are, regardless of what's hiding underneath.//
furnaceface: (Fire - Head Bowed)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 01:17 pm (UTC)(link)
//They were rather different from anything I've ever seen before,// Jono mused. //Either the island was having a lot of fun, or somebody went to a lot of trouble to put screaming killer fish into flying scuba suits. Either way... odd.//

He had managed to grab a few anti-grav units, though. So help him, he was going to figure out a way to fly again if it killed him.

And it probably wouldn't kill him.

//I'm glad you stuck around today, Hanna. I have two things for you... One is somewhat less exciting than the other, granted. Which would you like first?//

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 06:36 pm (UTC)(link)
"The less exciting, please." She suppressed a giggle. "I like to have things to look forward to."
furnaceface: (Fire - Headtilty)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 06:41 pm (UTC)(link)
//Boring old phone it is, then,// Jono replied, pulling his old clamshell phone from his pocket and holding it out to her. //I've taken anything personal off of it, it's got a new number and new card in it, and I've taken the liberty of putting it on a pay-as-you-go sort of plan that you can upgrade however you see fit. It doesn't have many fancy bells and whistles, but there are a few games, it takes pictures, and you can place calls and send texts with it, so it should be better than nothing, at least.//

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 06:45 pm (UTC)(link)
"Thank you very much, Professor," Hanna said, falling back on formality out of habit and gratitude, her accent getting stronger. She took the phone and carefully opened it, powering it on. "This should be more than enough. I very much appreciate this."
furnaceface: (X marks their grave)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 07:15 pm (UTC)(link)
//You're welcome, Hanna,// Jono replied, giving her a little nod of his head. He still didn't care to be called 'Professor,' but he could also recognize when formality was an old crutch. He'd let it go, for now. //If it gives you any trouble, let me know. Not that I'm expecting it to, of course.//

He shrugged, because at the end of the day a phone was still just a phone.

//And if you're ready for the second thing, I have some printouts for you from an old associate of mine back home.//

It had taken some doing to get Hank to put his assessment of the forms Hanna had supplied into layman's terms, or at least terms that Jono could parse and translate himself, but in the end they had puzzled out something that could hopefully be of some use to Hanna. Jono made a reach for a folder sitting on his desk.

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 07:51 pm (UTC)(link)
"I will do so." Hanna went very still, and clasped her hands in front of her, eyes fixed on the folder. "I hope that your associate did not go to too much trouble."

Slow even breaths. Ready for whatever the printouts said.
furnaceface: (Business)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 07:57 pm (UTC)(link)
//I doubt it was much trouble at all for Dr. McCoy,// Jono replied easily. //He's one of the most brilliant minds from my world. If anything, I imagine he had fun trying to dumb it down so that we could comprehend it.//

He opened the folder and held it out to her. In the front, there were the originals, the sheets that Hanna had handed to him. Just behind them, fresh printouts for her perusal.

//It should all be fairly straightforward. He threw in some speculations and observations of his own as well, and says if you have any questions, you can feel free to call him - his number's on the front printout - or use me as a proxy if you're more comfortable that way.//

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 08:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Hanna swallowed, her throat dry, and nodded, taking the folder with hands that she didn't allow to shake. It was a relief to get the print-outs back; she had so little from her old life. The next pages....

She read through the first page silently, then stopped, trying to digest it. "This says that I'm human," she said slowly. "One hundred percent. But that there are -- anomalies? In my DNA."

First: relief. Maybe it was ridiculous, but if she'd found out she was part cat or wolf or something else, she wouldn't have known how to react to that. Second: worry. She flipped to the second page, and then sat down. "Have you read this already?" she asked, looking up at Jon.
furnaceface: (Fire - Headtilty)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 08:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Jono gave a little nod of his head.

//I had to make certain that Hank was making this accessible, not just paraphrasing it all at the same level that it was written on in the first place,// he explained. //It took a few tries. Looks like they did a hell of a number on you, luv, but it's nothing we aren't already at least passingly familiar with back home.//

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 08:21 pm (UTC)(link)
"Truly?" There were people similar to her? That was definitely a relief to know. She studied Jon a moment, then said, "There were twenty other subjects in the project which created me. They were all terminated at the age of two."

It was selfish to feel lonely for them, wasn't it? Or futile. But still, it would have been nice, to have someone to have this in common with. But maybe Jon understood that, if his world had people like her.

"Unethical," she read aloud, lips thinning. "Risky gene splicing and ... no birth defects, no genetic defects." She looked up again. "I'm confused. How can that be unethical?"
furnaceface: (Fire - Squinty)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
//Playing god with a person's genetics without their knowledge or consent is a gross violation,// Jono explained, his brow furrowing a little. //What was done to your body... had it gone wrong, could've gone horribly so. But beyond that, it looks as though they tried to mess with your temperament... tried to take away the pieces of you that do make you human - your empathy - while they punched up those hormones that increase aggression. If it was simply a matter of making healthier babies... that'd be one thing. But this was clearly genetic manipulation for a much less philanthropic purpose.//

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 08:32 pm (UTC)(link)
"Oh." Hanna felt her face heat up with... embarrassment? Self-consciousness, yes. "Soldiers. That's what Papa said--" She shook her head, and kept reading. "Possibly inheritable temperament and traits. Health at 150% of the norm..." She kept reading, then put the paper down slowly. So many questions. Some of them were answered now, but others...

"Do you think-- How long do you think, a project like this would take? How much money?" She wanted to run, or punch something, or scream. And wasn't quite sure why.
furnaceface: (Worry)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 08:37 pm (UTC)(link)
//Far more money than I'll ever see in my lifetime,// Jono replied, thoughtfully, careful to present only a neutral front. She didn't need to see him getting angry on her behalf, he was sure. Particularly not while he was standing here looking like a human bonfire. //My best guess is millions, and decades of research at least. Whoever was responsible knew what they were doing. No happy accidents at play, here.//

He hesitated for a moment, and then he couldn't help but ask, //How're you holding up, Hanna?//

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 08:44 pm (UTC)(link)
"I don't know. I think-- I feel angry. But I'm not sure why." She looked up from the papers to meet his eyes. "It is such a waste. All the people who died as part of this. And to keep it secret. And my father is gone when all he did was try to keep me safe. Teach me what I needed to survive." Her voice was getting harder, and her fists were clenching in her lap. "And I think I am very angry that they made me like this, and then left me all alone."

Yes. That was it. She was shaking with rage that all those plans, those complicated science changes and goals for a perfect soldier or Olympic-class athlete were done, and they never planned for what would happen if the project failed. Beyond burning it to the ground. Because she had no idea what to do next.
Edited 2015-01-24 20:45 (UTC)
furnaceface: (Fire - Thinking)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 08:50 pm (UTC)(link)
//It is,// he agreed, gently. //It's an unbelievable waste, an unforgivable one, and I'm sorry that it's left you with so much loss and fear.//

He could have left it at that. Could have given her his condolences, but he felt at least partially responsible. He'd facilitated her finding out this much, after all. Hell, he was the one who drove her to the island in the first place. And she was his student.

//But you're not alone,// he added, //not here. You might never find somebody else exactly like you, but you're not alone. There are people who understand.//

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 08:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Hanna nodded silently, then closed her eyes, breathing in harshly through her nose, out through her mouth, five times. Long enough to calm down. Then opened her eyes again.

"I will go running. And. That will help me be less angry." Another breath. "And-- it is good to know. That there are people like me, that I'm not the only one. This class," she said awkwardly. "It helps. It answers questions before I think to have them. I do not feel so unprepared, now." She slowly shut the folder. "Please thank your friend for me, for taking the time to do this."
furnaceface: (Bachalo Grim)

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[personal profile] furnaceface 2015-01-24 09:42 pm (UTC)(link)
//I'll let him know you said so,// Jono replied with a nod. //And if there's anything else I can do, please, don't hesitate to let me know, okay?//

He wasn't going to try to keep her any longer. If she thought what she needed was a good run, odds were she knew best.

Re: Talk to the Teachers [1-23]

[identity profile] hexentotchen.livejournal.com 2015-01-24 09:48 pm (UTC)(link)
"I will do so. Thank you, Pr- Jon." Hanna caught herself, slowly getting to her feet. "For the phone. And for listening." Not enough people had done that for her, in the past. It meant a lot to her, to be treated as an adult, almost.

How fast could she run before she felt it? The folder could probably tell her. But she thought she would rather find out for herself.