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fandomhigh2014-09-02 03:53 am
glacial_queen) wrote in fandomhigh2014-09-02 03:53 am
Entry tags:
Defying Expectations, Tuesday, Per 3
"Morning," Karla said, giving her class a wan smile. It was hard to be convincing when you were on your third straight day of roiling nausea. Not throwing up, just sourceless, endless nausea. "Now that introductions are over, we can start digging into the meat of this class." Bad choice of words there, Karla.
"Destiny is an intimidating topic. Even if you're thrilled about whatever is waiting for you, it can be scary because you're talking about something that can set the tone for your whole life even if it doesn't take up your whole life. Not having a destiny can be just as scary; while you have more freedom to decide what you want, there's more uncertainty, too. Sometimes it's comforting to know what's waiting for you; even if you hate it, it gives you something to work against. Every week, we're going to spend the first part of class just talking about how you're feeling about things." She wrinkled her nose--that actually sounded way more touchy-feely than she'd intended. "I don't mean we're going to sit in a circle and hug our problems out, but sometimes it's just good to talk. Whether you're working towards your destiny, against it, or just figuring out what the Hell you want to do with yourself after high school, this is a chance for you to ask questions, get advice from myself and any other students, or just bitch that your parents are sending you college applications and you're only a sophomore."
Whatever worked for them. Karla wouldn't judge.
"Now trick to handling other people's expectations is to first start managing your own and, to do that, you're going to need to make a couple of decisions. Whether you're going to college, you're taking over the family business, or you're betrothed in order to bring peace to your native land, most of you have something waiting for you after you get home that wasn't necessarily your decision to make. The first step here is to decide whether this is something you're going to accept or something you're going to avoid. I know some of you have already made that decision, but now I'm going to ask you to think about why. Is it something you're looking forward to? Maybe you've heard tons of stories about how much fun college is from your older friends or you've fallen in love with your betrothed. Is it something you've ever really thought about? Maybe you think that 'everyone' goes to college these days or that inheriting your mother's company is a part of your personal identity--you wouldn't know who you'd be without it. If you don't want that destiny, why not? Are you afraid of something? Do you hate the institution your destiny is part of? Does it bother you not to be able to make your own choice? Any and all of these answers are valid, even if they're contradictory. People are complicated and so are their reactions to things. I resented the Hell out of having to be Queen so early, but even if I'd had the choice, I wouldn't have done it any other way. Being a Queen is too much who I am. Very few of us get to have easy answers for things."
"Once you're done questioning why you're on the path you're on, it's time to start talking about the how. And, for that, I have a worksheet for you." She gestured to Kaylin to start handing them outif she was there. "This worksheet looks dumb. And as you start to fill it out, you'll probably feel dumb. It's very, very basic, but sometimes that's what you have to get back to before you can move on to bigger and better things. The problem is that we take for granted so much of what we think, feel, and do without closely examining the reasons behind them, which makes it very hard to come up with ways to address them. Thus, this worksheet, which I'll admit I found useful even while I felt like an idiot filling it in. I nearly printed it out in Comic Sans just to really hammer that home, but I decided I liked you all too much. You're welcome."
Your teacher was a real giver here.
"What the worksheet asks you to do is break down what you're feeling and why into more manageable chunks. Anytime you're confronted with something huge and implacable, the easiest way to handle it is to break it down into smaller pieces until you're faced with something that you can do. Now, I'm not going to ask for these to be handed in. They're for your reference only, though you're free to share them with anyone you like. I'd like you to bring them to class each week because you might need to reference them, but they're not going to be collected and no one's going to judge you on the contents of yours. Please be as honest as possible on them because they're meant to be tools to help you work towards the future, but I can't make you do that, or take it seriously, so..." Karla shrugged. "We're looking at a typical 'You get out what you put in' scenario. Do with that as you will."
"Destiny is an intimidating topic. Even if you're thrilled about whatever is waiting for you, it can be scary because you're talking about something that can set the tone for your whole life even if it doesn't take up your whole life. Not having a destiny can be just as scary; while you have more freedom to decide what you want, there's more uncertainty, too. Sometimes it's comforting to know what's waiting for you; even if you hate it, it gives you something to work against. Every week, we're going to spend the first part of class just talking about how you're feeling about things." She wrinkled her nose--that actually sounded way more touchy-feely than she'd intended. "I don't mean we're going to sit in a circle and hug our problems out, but sometimes it's just good to talk. Whether you're working towards your destiny, against it, or just figuring out what the Hell you want to do with yourself after high school, this is a chance for you to ask questions, get advice from myself and any other students, or just bitch that your parents are sending you college applications and you're only a sophomore."
Whatever worked for them. Karla wouldn't judge.
"Now trick to handling other people's expectations is to first start managing your own and, to do that, you're going to need to make a couple of decisions. Whether you're going to college, you're taking over the family business, or you're betrothed in order to bring peace to your native land, most of you have something waiting for you after you get home that wasn't necessarily your decision to make. The first step here is to decide whether this is something you're going to accept or something you're going to avoid. I know some of you have already made that decision, but now I'm going to ask you to think about why. Is it something you're looking forward to? Maybe you've heard tons of stories about how much fun college is from your older friends or you've fallen in love with your betrothed. Is it something you've ever really thought about? Maybe you think that 'everyone' goes to college these days or that inheriting your mother's company is a part of your personal identity--you wouldn't know who you'd be without it. If you don't want that destiny, why not? Are you afraid of something? Do you hate the institution your destiny is part of? Does it bother you not to be able to make your own choice? Any and all of these answers are valid, even if they're contradictory. People are complicated and so are their reactions to things. I resented the Hell out of having to be Queen so early, but even if I'd had the choice, I wouldn't have done it any other way. Being a Queen is too much who I am. Very few of us get to have easy answers for things."
"Once you're done questioning why you're on the path you're on, it's time to start talking about the how. And, for that, I have a worksheet for you." She gestured to Kaylin to start handing them out
Your teacher was a real giver here.
"What the worksheet asks you to do is break down what you're feeling and why into more manageable chunks. Anytime you're confronted with something huge and implacable, the easiest way to handle it is to break it down into smaller pieces until you're faced with something that you can do. Now, I'm not going to ask for these to be handed in. They're for your reference only, though you're free to share them with anyone you like. I'd like you to bring them to class each week because you might need to reference them, but they're not going to be collected and no one's going to judge you on the contents of yours. Please be as honest as possible on them because they're meant to be tools to help you work towards the future, but I can't make you do that, or take it seriously, so..." Karla shrugged. "We're looking at a typical 'You get out what you put in' scenario. Do with that as you will."
Discussion Topic--How?
Please fill this out to the best of your ability. Feel free to share, discuss, or keep secret.
Destiny:
Choose one Do you intend to: Accept, Deny, Unsure, No destiny
Fill out as many of these as you like.
Concern -- Possible Solution:
If you have already refused your destiny or have no destiny that you can think of, think of what you might WANT to do instead and fill out this section.
Options (What might I want to do?):
Fill out as many of these as you like.
Concern -- Possible Solution:
Re: Discussion Topic--How?
Destiny: Queen of Arendelle
Choose one Do you intend to: Accept, Deny, Unsure, No destiny
Fill out as many of these as you like.
Concern -- Possible Solution:
1. No experience in governance - Get some experience? (Apologies that this is a copy of your sheet, but it's quite relevant.)
2. No experience with people. They intimidate me - Get out more. Meet more people. Go to dances? No, smaller. Parties. Parties first, and then maybe dances.
3. Parents fired almost all of the staff at the castle - Beg Kai and Gerda to hire more? Continue living without? That was easier for my parents, who actually knew what they were doing.
4. Terrifying ice powers - Learn to use them? Ask friends who have offered for more help. Remember Dean Skywalker's calming meditation - There is no emotion, there is peace.
5. Dean Skywalker's mantra is disturbingly similar to 'conceal, don't feel.' - ???
6. Magic is rare back home, subjects will go on a witch hunt - ... Conceal, don't feel.
7. "Do you want to bui
Elsa stopped writing abruptly right about there, pulled in a deep breath, and then murmured an apology as she wrapped her arms around herself, leaving her paper at her desk and attempting to make her way to the door.
If she looked even half as small as she felt, maybe nobody would notice.
Re: Discussion Topic--How?
Which, left her hovering in Elsa's sightline, trying to figure out what to do.
Well, either Elsa would say something or she'd continue on out without saying anything.
Re: Discussion Topic--How?
She gave Kaylin a deer-in-headlights look for a moment as her breath caught, and then she folded into herself a little more, murmuring "sorry," a few more times under her breath before picking up her pace again and heading out into the hallway.
She needed to find somewhere to be alone.
Conceal, don't feel.
Re: Discussion Topic--How?
Please fill this out to the best of your ability. Feel free to share, discuss, or keep secret.
Destiny: The Messiah
Choose one Do you intend to: Accept, Deny, Unsure, No destiny
Fill out as many of these as you like.
Concern -- Possible Solution:
1. The cult won't take no for an answer. -- Avoid the cult at all costs.
2. Mother won't take no for an answer, either. -- Avoid Mother.
3. Mother might make someone else into the Messiah, against their will. -- It might become necessary at some point to deal with Mother more permanently if she won't stop hurting people.
4. Why does this have to be my life? -- Because no one said that life was fair and at least I'm out of Rapture now.
5. That bitch killed Father. -- I'm just using this sheet to vent now. I wonder if that's all right.
If you have already refused your destiny or have no destiny that you can think of, think of what you might WANT to do instead and fill out this section.
Options (What might I want to do?):
- Travel the world
- Become a mercenary
Fill out as many of these as you like.
Concern -- Possible Solution:
Traveling
1. Money? -- Take odd jobs. Save up now. (Steal?)
2. Missing proper documentation to travel on airlines, etc. -- Ask Barry for help.
3. Lonely? -- Make new friends. Stay in touch with current ones.
Mercenary
1. Ethics? -- Only take jobs I can stomach.
2. Violence? -- I can heal.
3. Is that really what I want?! -- Dunno.
Re: Discussion Topic--How?
Destiny:
Choose one Do you intend to: Accept, Deny, Unsure, No destiny
Fill out as many of these as you like.
Concern -- Possible Solution:
What if I can't kill people? -- More training.
What if I disagree with the Emperor about a matter of justice? -- Don't.
What if I'm not good at it? -- Back to the training.
Re: Discussion Topic--How?
Destiny: To become a Hawk
Choose one Do you intend to: Accept. Obviously
Fill out as many of these as you like.
Concern -- Possible Solution:
1) I suck at tact - get better. Or people will have to deal.
2) Always late - try to get up earlier. Or people will have to deal.
3) Failing almost all courses - work harder, except their stupid and won't save my life anyway so who cares? And people will have to deal.
4) Possibly may be eaten by angry dragon - huh... Try to avoid dragons?