fandomhigh | Doctoring 101

So, last week Navaan had told the class that she'd be explaining to them the finer details of seducing secrets out of people. In the time between that class and this one, there had been evil carnivals, battles, hugging, sleep, alcohol, sex, and illicit substances. Therefore, Navaan couldnt be bothered remembering what she’d said they would talk about this class and had come in with an entirely new class prepared.

Though, lets all be honest. Navaan probably wouldn't have remembered even if none of those things had been involved.

"So, it’s our last day to study doctoring!" she said when the class met up in front of Portalocity. "Which means it's time for us to sit down as a group, discuss the merits and flaws of taking this course and then my methodology as an instructor." She waited just long enough for that to sink in before cackling and waving that away. "Ha! Just kidding! No, don't worry, this last class'll be way more useful!"

Sorry, Ichabod.

"Like most of you saw last weekend, sometimes shit happens and we, as doctors, have a duty to stop it, especially when our patients' health and safety are on the line. At any time, we may be called upon to fend off the attacks of mad gods, evil carnivals, and the most heinous enemies of all, rival doctors. If you find yourself in that position, the easiest thing to do is straight up murder your opponent, preferably when they have no idea that you're there or even that you exist. You can't defend against an enemy you don't know is there!"

She sounded far too cheerful for this. On the other hand, a ridiculous number of your other teachers—and possibly even some of your schoolmates—would agree with her.

"If murdering them is out of the picture for some reason, like they already know what you're planning or they're spending all their time in the sun just so you'll explode if you try, you can also challenge them for superiority. I prefer to challenge my opponents to a trial by fuck, which is a fight without the bit before it gets sexy. If you're really good, you can combine this with the first idea and kill them when they least expect it, but that's only really effective if you've already come first."

It seemed Navaan had decided not to hold back today. At all. You're welcome? Either for this pure look inside her mind or for the past six weeks when she apparently had been holding back. Whichever works best for you.

"If you don’t think you can win a trial--or if you're pretty sure your opponent plans to use it to try to kill you, too--there are lots of other types of challenges you can issue. A drinking challenge is always good. You get to see who holds their alcohol better, which is always important to know, and, if it's you, kill them when they pass out! Games of chance or skill are good choices, too: beer pong, darts, billiards, arm wrestling, who can seduce the most people…"

Yeah, there was probably a theme here. And if you figured out how the final class was going to go, congratulations! That Bat guy might be proud of your deductive reasoning! Or just disappointed you hadn't found a way to escape the class yet. If you hadn't figured out what was up, then having the portal open up in front of a seedy, rundown looking pub in Navaan's world probably came as something of a shock.

For several reasons. But don't worry class! You probably won't get tetanus. Err, you all had had your shots, right?

"So, for our final class, you’re going to have a chance to rise to a challenge and see how you'd do against an enemy." Navaan explained, cheerfully herding them all inside. "Doesn't this sound fun?"

[Comic link is NSFW]

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"If it was," she mused, closing one eye to aim, "it's taken an awfully long time to manifest in you."

Most contagious things she knew of didn't have a two-month incubation period, after all.

The first dart completely missed the board, which was probably understandable, given that Celia hadn't thrown anything simply by hand since she was a very small child. The second managed to land in a double 4, while the third cleared a single 13.

"And...that is why I cheat with magic. That is exactly why." She didn't look too upset about it, though.

And Ichabod saw no reason to be judgmental about it. "But what about the challenge of the game? Doesn't it make it predictable?"

He picked the darts from the board.

"Not when you practice against other magicians," Celia pointed out, smiling slightly. "But yes, it rather does. Human error makes things a bit more...fun. It's a luxury I haven't been able to afford, before."

Because she hadn't been allowed. It was nice to be able to pretend she was halfway normal here, sometimes.

[and now it's my turn to apologize for extra-slow SP!]

Smiling, Ichabod aimed at the dart board again. "Yes, the unpredictability of human life." He hit 7.

"So, should I suggest more activities where magic is out of bounds?" He glanced at her, then threw the dart, scoring a 3. The next one hit a double 4.

Celia raised a brow at him dubiously, still holding her own darts for the moment. "Such as?"

There was a lot of room for her to fail contained in that suggestion, and while she was warming to the idea that it wasn't the end of the world if wasn't the best at everything, she still didn't relish the prospect of looking like a fool.

Ichabod sensed her reluctance, and as his intention wasn't to make her uncomfortable, he replied, giving her a more serious look: "That choice would be yours."

She smiled, a little more at ease -- though she mentally scolded herself for even worrying about looking stupid in some hypothetical effort, anyway, as he probably wouldn't care. "If I'm without magic," she said, thoughtful, "we ought to make you use your left hand, or something." Though depending on the activity, dominant hands might not even be important.

A thought occurred to her, and her eyes widened. "...do you play chess?" She was fairly sure she already knew the answer. "Because I do, and a lack of magic wouldn't hinder me in the slightest." And it was something where she wouldn't feel immediately clumsy at not being able to use it, like so many other things.

"I do as well," Ichabod replied, looking pleased. "And it would be on equal terms." Perhaps he should mention that eidetic memory offered quite good opportunities for memorizing strategies from books?

"Perfect. I've been playing since I was little -- it was one of my father's favorite training exercises," she explained, smiling. "But it's not as though I'm incapable of moving the pieces by hand, after all."

She hadn't even taken his memory into consideration, which was probably for the best.

"I look forward to it," Ichabod said. "But we still have this game to finish, and rewards to be had." Because he really felt it would be a pity to miss those rewards.

"You're just excited to win," Celia teased, but she lined up her first shot all the same. The first dart managed a triple 3, which she was quite pleased about. The second scored a neat 4, while the third...once again missed the board entirely.

So, yes, he was almost certainly going to win, here. What a shame. Celia felt just terrible about her impending loss, really.

A 14, a 5 and a 7. That was enough to win ~~unless I'm too lazy to calculate correctly~~ and Ichabod gave her a smug look. Not that he would have minded terribly to lose, considering the cost of it.

"Perhaps I am."

And, though she was not typically a very graceful loser, Celia went onto her toes to press a congratulatory kiss to his cheek.

"That's one. And where would you like to claim the rest of your reward?" she asked, smiling up at him with her brows raised innocently. "I'd prefer to relocate to somewhere more secluded, just to ensure you truly get what you won. I might be forced to rush, in a place like this."

And neither of them would want that.

"I certainly wouldn't want to rush," he replied with an amused look. "Perhaps, when this class is over, we could... meet in your room?"

He blushed slightly. In his time, it would definitely not be a respectable thing to suggest.

Doctoring 101

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