fandomhigh | Practical Philosophy, Wednesday

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practical philosophy

Practical Philosophy, Wednesday

It was a somewhat tired-looking Ender that met them outside today. He hadn't slept well last night, and he had no doubt his class would suffer because of it. Ah, well; it wasn't like the fate of the planet rested on his shoulders.

"I spent some time talking to some of you about attachment last week," he said. "It's as good a topic as any to head into further, considering that the most notable event of the week was the invasion of a series of clones... and I'm not sure how interesting discussing the ethics of cloning would be."

Or pink ponies, for that matter.

"So. Attachments. Do you need them? Don't you? When do they go 'too far'? Human social structure relies on them - in so many ways - but for us personally the experience of them can differ wildly, depending on our circumstances. Sometimes it may be advantageous to avoid them altogether, to get rid of distraction. And sometimes they can suddenly come through in unexpected ways, as our friends swoop in to clear debris and fight battles we thought we had to face alone."

He shrugged lightly.

"I have a complicated relationship with the notion myself," he said. "I'm an introvert. I prefer to keep my circle small, so it doesn't suck up too much of my energy, and so I can rely on the fact that those I care about are invested enough to stick with me."

To a point. Ender's real thoughts on the matter were rather more complicated.

"Some of you are social butterflies. Some of you aren't. Some people have a near traumatic reaction to the end of the summer - the time of year when all the graduates leave. I wonder how all of you'll handle that."

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"Not as literally as yours," Ender said mildly, "But yes."

"Sorry," Cade said, and he sounded sincere about it.

"What's there to be sorry about?" Ender asked, glancing around for any squirrels in the area.

Cade ran his hand through his hair. "Can't I be sorry that you aren't feeling great? I'm not that heartless."

"You can be sorry for it," Ender said lightly. "I just question how useful it is - or how applicable."

He paused. "I have nightmares sometimes," he volunteered. "It's not as bad as it used to be."

"Any idea what kicked 'em off again?" Cade asked.

"Does there have to be a reason?" Ender replied.

"Nah, but I find mine tend to be linked to more stress or bad anniversaries," Cade said.

"No anniversaries," Ender said, shaking his head. "And the only stress we have is family planning, which is getting to Ben more than me."

"Oh yeah?" Cade replied, flopping back on the grass and tilting his head at Ender. "Why's he worried?"

"He's worried something will go wrong," Ender said, "Which is a normal state of being for him. He's also worried we'll be told it won't work."

"Doesn't my existence make that worry a little stoopa?" Cade asked.

"You think worry listens to reasons?" Ender asked him dryly.

"Not generally," Cade admitted. "Plus Ben's happy when he's worried."

Ender snorted softly. "Sometimes," he admitted. "But it's less that he's happy than that it's just his usual state of mind."

"Any theories on why that is?" Cade said. "I'm betting it's something to do with his mom dying."

"It's something to do with being the child of two Jedi who insisted on moving around pursuing threats," Ender said. "His mother dying didn't help, but the tendencies were already there."

"How long have you known him anyway?" Cade asked. "I mean, the way Dad talked, it was just this side of the cradle."

Ender let out a soft chuckle. "I met him when we were both 14 and freshmen at Fandom High," he said. "I think. I think I turned 15 that winter."

"That's practically forever," Cade decided. "Did you meet Mara?"

"Not really," Ender said. "Though I wish I'd had the time to talk to her... but I picture it as talking to her as I am now."

"Not as a fourteen year old?" Cade smiled slightly. "Go figure. What would you've said?"

"I don't know," Ender said wryly. "I would've sat down and had a conversation with her. I'd be interested in finding out if she knew what she was doing as a parent better than Luke did."

Cade snorted and flung his arm up to cover his eyes. "That can't be too karking hard."

"It's complicated," Ender said.

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