fandomhigh | Try Not to Die [Thursday, June 5, 2014]

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try not to die

Try Not to Die [Thursday, June 5, 2014]

"Today I am sending you to the forest moon of Endor," Anakin told the class. "It's the furthest moon from the planet also called Endor, but Endor the planet is a gas giant and launching you into it would negate the whole purpose of a class called 'Try Not to Die' because you wouldn't be able to survive."

He's all heart, class.

"This moon is mostly forest, obviously, but the trees are more like the redwood trees of your planet and not quite as huge as the ones we saw on the Wookiee homeworld. The sentient species here--the Ewoks--build their homes in them and connect between the trees with large bridges, but you can walk on the moon's surface and not be immediately eaten by a predator, which is not true on Kashyyyk. The gravity is a little lighter than standard, so you'll be able to jump higher than you usually can. The air is breathable unless you have seasonal allergies that are grass or tree related because they didn't call this the forest moon to be ironic. As usual, you have two tasks to complete. Please don't irritate the Ewoks, or let their small size and general cuteness fool you. They don't have any problems roasting humans over a spit and eating them--they tried with my," sigh, "son-in-law." He clapped his hands together. "Off you go."

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Another forest, Anakin?

Nathan Byrn

Barry Ween

Jessica Drew

Kira Yukimura

Emma Swan

Edward Kenway

Alana

Kaylin Neya

Karina Lyle

Right. Killer teddy bears are a thing.

The Ewoks used rudimentary weapons in order to defend themselves from the other predators in the forest. In Fly It, you would get to test fly one of their skin gliders by leaping from the top of a tree and drop a rock into a bullseye painted on the ground without crashing into anything (like a tree or the ground...). If you miss the target, you have to try again.

In Build It, you will help a group of Ewoks to suspend a couple of extremely large and heavy trees sixty feet in the air in order to squash large enemies between them. You don't have to stick around for that part, but you do have to help them lift and secure both logs.

Fly It seemed a little more exciting and easier than building so Nathan went with that. After missing the damn bullseye several times, he began to reconsider his choice.

Eventually, he did hit the damn thing but it took awhile.

Barry chose fly it and insisted on adding additional structural support to the skin gliders before going after the target.

Barry was probably about two steps away from being roasted a pit but he wasn't getting on that thing without trying to improve it.

Kira chose the Fly It option because it seemed kind of exciting. A little dangerous, but exciting. It still took her like four tries to hit the bullseye, but she was glad to have glided without dying.

Emma wasn't really sure picking Fly It was really the safest choice, but it seemed quicker and she had a good eye so it didn't take that many tries to get it.

This was not Alana's detour. She started out on the glider, crashed into a tree, tried again, missed the bullseye, missed the bullseye another four times, switched to Build It ... and then got stuck helping the World's Slowest Ewok Crew.

She sighed heavily as she raced off to the next task. She was hoping to make up time, but she wasn't too sure she'd be able to.

Flying? You think Kaylin would get a chance to fly in any fashion and pass it up? Not a chance in all the worlds' hells.

She might have done it a number of times on purpose - and gotten the Ewoks to cheer at her crazy enthusiasm.

You must take a speeder and fly it through the heavily forested...forest...to get from one Ewok village to another. Please, please do not squash yourself into a tree and die. There will be paperwork.

Anakin has thoughtfully provided helmets. What a giver.

Since he was already lagging behind, Nathan took his time with the speeder so he didn't end up as roadkill. The slowness helped him not die but it was just that: slow. Very slow.

Oh well.

Okay. The speeders? That was fucking fun. Even Barry had to admit that.

Okay, the helmet was not making Kira feel safer, so she didn't take her speeder trip very speedily. She knew she was falling behind but she wanted to make it to the end in one piece.

Emma was judging your safety choices today, Anakin. Not that it stopped her from pushing the bike to see how fast it'd go in some of the clearer stretches.

At least this part was fun. Alana started to feel a little better about the way the class was going as she steered past the trees. She wasn't passing anybody, but maybe she was somehow first?

Whoo! Kaylin was her usual lead footed, enthusiastic, uncaring of her safety (or anyone else's for that matter) and went flying along like a madwoman.

Uneaten!

Nathan eventually jogged in, uneaten and unsquished, so maybe that was accomplishment enough even if he knew he'd lagged behind.

"You're seventh today," Anakin said. "Tough run?"

"My aim wasn't all that great," Nathan said, shrugging. "Probably not the best choice for me there."

"What's with all the fucking teddy bears?" Barry asked when he came over the finish line.

"Ewoks," Anakin said, "and they live here and...I really don't know. They're strange."

"No fucking kidding," Barry said with a roll of his eyes. "Hey, if I make something for them would it be a problem shipping them something?"

"What kind of something?" Anakin asked, arching up an eyebrow.

"Just a glider."

...

"An improved glider."

...

"Powered by pine cones."

Kira was alive and uneaten, but frustrated as she did a head count of the people already here when she arrived. "Ugh I hate this claaass."

"I'd say I'm sorry to hear that," Anakin replied, "but I'm not all that sorry."

"Um, I didn't mean it like that?" Kira said sheepishly. "I mean, it's fun! And we do cool stuff! But I stink at everything, apparently."

"I don't want to make it too easy," Anakin said.

Because he was evil.

Emma was very much not eaten as she arrived at the check-in. Yay.

"You're third today," Anakin said with a small smile.

Well, at least she was being relatively consistent.

"So did someone cut a bunch of Wookies in half to make the murderous teddies?" What, she had to ask. Even the names were similar.

Alana tried to stay hopeful as she raced toward the check-in, but her stomach was in knots.

"You're the last one in today," Anakin said. "Tough going?"

"I should've stuck with the flying," Alana sighed. "Next week has to be better, right?"

"Hah! That was amazing!! Can I do it again?"

She was windblown and tousled and absolutely in the best mood anyone had ever seen her in, in well, ever. Ever ever.

Anakin's not a huge fan of the big Ewok bonfires. Just sayin'.

And Jessica wasn't a fan of sneezing as much as she was right now. She was blaming alien pollen. Stupid alien pollen.

Let's not talk about how many times I typed Ender instead of Endor...

The RNG sayeth:

1. Andros
2. Kaylin Neya
3. Emma Swan
4. Barry Ween
5. Karina Lyle
6. Edward Kenway
7. Nathan Byrn
8. Kira Yukimura
9. Alana

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Try Not to Die [Thursday, June 5, 2014]

Sign in [6/5]

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Listen to the briefing [6/5]

Detour: Fly It or Build It

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Road Block!

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Check in

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Talk to Anakin or Jessica!

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OOC