fandomhigh | Advanced Criminal Justice, Monday, Period 3

The Batman's run with the Cubs during spring training was kind of confusing because he wasn't invited to be on the team and he certainly wasn't signed to a contract, but boy, could he sock some dingers, and that helped him stick around. But after a week, it was as if he remembered that he had more important things to do. So he packed up, put his cowl back on, and returned to Fandom.

It was okay, everyone. Batman was back and everything was back to normal.

"Bonjour, classe," Batman said, in an outrageous French accent, his dialogue poorly written as if it had gone through some sort of search engine translation. This probably explained why the Danger Shop looked like a French public space rather than an urban American rooftop. "J'espère que vous avez apprécié les vacances de printemps. Mais le temps de repos est terminée et maintenant nous devons être de retour au travail! Aujourd'hui, nous allons discuter de la façon de construire la grande arme de la justice commune, la guillotine."

If you followed any of that, you probably knew you were in for a hell of a class. And if you didn't get into it, heads might roll! Oh, Revolutionary humor.

Seriously, though, he started telling you how to build a guillotine, so you had better start getting supplies together from that pile at the edge of the square.

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Internationally! Or with a mustache.

The English version, before Google got to it:

"Hello, class. I hope you enjoyed Spring Break. But the time for rest is over and now we must be back to work! Today, we will discuss how to build the great weapon of common justice, the guillotine."

Also, yes, Batman is rocking that mustache.

Get to work building a guillotine! Don't worry, school administration, your heads will not be on the chopping block.

Yet.

Edited 2014-03-03 06:12 (UTC)

Maybe he speaks French? But even if he does, he probably won't actually understand what's going on. I mean, his teacher is suddenly, outrageously French. How do you explain that?

En Français.

Actually, no, let's just do it in English from here on out in slash translations //like this.// Because I'm not Google Translating everything.

Key points:

1) Batman currently thinks he's a French freedom fighter.

2) The mustache is because he's a French freedom fighter.

3) It's gonna be a different thing every week this month.

4) Don't decapitate anyone.

Maddie Berry ~~because European people might wear glasses? idk. idek.~~

Maddie was listening. She wasn't understanding, but she was listening and trying to understand.

And wondering if this was a prank or a test?

Maddie saw the objects, she thought she might know what they were doing because she thought she heard the word 'guillotine'...

"I don't even," she said after a moment, staring at the supplies and shaking her head.

Korra ~~a beard is close to a moustache?~~

Evan Sabahnur ~~representing Egypt, because of course he is.~~

Evan was half-raised by Fantomex! Which didn't really mean much, since despite his all-too-thick ridiculous French accent, Fantomex technically wasn't actually French, either.

This hadn't stopped Evan from trying to learn enough at one point to be able to follow basic conversation, so mostly he was just left going, "Qu'est-ce que c'est?"

You know, Evan had actually kind of been rolling with whatever was going on here, sure that Batman had his reasons, right up until that last bit.

Now he was mostly just staring in horror.

Maybe there was some other, more different, less decapitatey kind of guillotine out there that Evan just hadn't heard of before? Or maybe this was just some kind of jo- oh. No. There was the giant blade with the diagonal cutting edge and everything.

"This is not okay."

He'd probably just cut his own foot off if he tried to break it by dropping it or something, wouldn't he? That was a Danger Shop blade and not something that crazy-French-Batman had brought in from outside, right?

Karina Lyle ~~because Pepsi is sold internationally?~~

Karina had actually understood most of what he'd said.

Hence her look of total horror. Seriously?!

"Nope," Karina announced, standing as far away from the supplies as it was possible to get and still be in the area. "I'm not doing this."

And no one could make her. So there.

Alex Aaron ~~repping Japan and Greece~~

Alex looked around and asked, "Uh. Does anyone know what he said?"

Advanced Criminal Justice, Monday, Period 3

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Activité: La Guillotine

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Talk to Batman

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