Jono Starsmore (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
furnaceface) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2014-01-24 11:05 am
furnaceface) wrote in fandomhigh2014-01-24 11:05 am
Entry tags:
Coping With Change, Friday, Period 3
//I'm not religious,// Jono started his class with today. //Not by a bloody long shot. And if anyone else in this room is or isn't is no business of mine. Pray or don't pray, whatever gets you by. So, please don't think I'm making any statement one way or the next if I quote a prayer to you that's become popular, of all places, in a lot of those twelve-step programs that people talk about, these days.//
A beat.
//… Not that this is one of those, either.// Thank you for that clarification, Jon. //Either way, it goes something like, 'grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.' And I only bring it up because this week, we're discussing the fact that sometimes things happen that you have no control over.//
He suspected a few people in the room already had things coming to mind, in fact.
//As much as I'm certain each and everyone one of us would like to be,// except probably Yeul, //we are not one hundred percent in charge of the things that go on in our lives. Hell, most of us aren't even in charge of how we feel about those things, so stuff anybody who tells you that you should be able to just stop feeling the way you feel, as if there was a magic bloody switch to flip that will suddenly make you happy for no good reason other than 'happy is better than upset.'//
Okay, so Jono was a telepath, and technically he knew that there was such a switch and were in the brain to poke around in order to flip it. That didn't mean that he was going to. That didn't even mean that he thought it was a good idea. Not by a long shot.
//But there's a line between how you feel about something that's beyond your control, and how you think about and approach it. Does this thing hurt you or the people around you? Possibly. Is it something that you can - or even should - step in and fix? Possibly not. I'm not saying you should curl up and take it, either. Even if you can't fix the source of a problem directly, very rarely are we completely helpless. But if you're anything like me - because I can only really speak for myself on this one anyway - you might find yourself asking, 'Why didn't I do more?'//
Really, this was Jono's mantra, some days.
//Sometimes, the only answer for it is, 'because I couldn't.' Because when the other shoe dropped, I was too occupied saving the lives of my troops to double back and die trying to save the village I never would've reached anyway. Because I am not personally responsible for the attitudes of the people around me, and whether they choose to accept or hate is their choice to make, try though I might to give them reasons to lean toward the latter. Because sometimes, it just rains. Sometimes, people need to feel their hurt. There's an infinite number of cases of 'sometimes,' and while I might be able to make a difference, I'm just one man, with a very finite capacity to change the world around me. I might hate it. I might struggle against it to my dying moment. But it's a truth about the world around me, and if I spend the rest of my life tearing myself down because of it, when the hell will I ever find the time to stand up?//
It was still a work in progress.
//Today, just like every other class, I don't expect you to share with the rest of the people in the room. Today, I just want you to think, if you're feeling up to it, about the circumstances you're in, about the world around you. About what you can actually fix versus the things you have to accept, to work around, to stop beating yourself upside the head over. You can talk about it if you like, perhaps to share a revelation you've had or to ask for a second opinion on something you're still not completely certain isn't up to you to fix. But mostly… I just want you to think. To try to know the difference.//
[Open!]
A beat.
//… Not that this is one of those, either.// Thank you for that clarification, Jon. //Either way, it goes something like, 'grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.' And I only bring it up because this week, we're discussing the fact that sometimes things happen that you have no control over.//
He suspected a few people in the room already had things coming to mind, in fact.
//As much as I'm certain each and everyone one of us would like to be,// except probably Yeul, //we are not one hundred percent in charge of the things that go on in our lives. Hell, most of us aren't even in charge of how we feel about those things, so stuff anybody who tells you that you should be able to just stop feeling the way you feel, as if there was a magic bloody switch to flip that will suddenly make you happy for no good reason other than 'happy is better than upset.'//
Okay, so Jono was a telepath, and technically he knew that there was such a switch and were in the brain to poke around in order to flip it. That didn't mean that he was going to. That didn't even mean that he thought it was a good idea. Not by a long shot.
//But there's a line between how you feel about something that's beyond your control, and how you think about and approach it. Does this thing hurt you or the people around you? Possibly. Is it something that you can - or even should - step in and fix? Possibly not. I'm not saying you should curl up and take it, either. Even if you can't fix the source of a problem directly, very rarely are we completely helpless. But if you're anything like me - because I can only really speak for myself on this one anyway - you might find yourself asking, 'Why didn't I do more?'//
Really, this was Jono's mantra, some days.
//Sometimes, the only answer for it is, 'because I couldn't.' Because when the other shoe dropped, I was too occupied saving the lives of my troops to double back and die trying to save the village I never would've reached anyway. Because I am not personally responsible for the attitudes of the people around me, and whether they choose to accept or hate is their choice to make, try though I might to give them reasons to lean toward the latter. Because sometimes, it just rains. Sometimes, people need to feel their hurt. There's an infinite number of cases of 'sometimes,' and while I might be able to make a difference, I'm just one man, with a very finite capacity to change the world around me. I might hate it. I might struggle against it to my dying moment. But it's a truth about the world around me, and if I spend the rest of my life tearing myself down because of it, when the hell will I ever find the time to stand up?//
It was still a work in progress.
//Today, just like every other class, I don't expect you to share with the rest of the people in the room. Today, I just want you to think, if you're feeling up to it, about the circumstances you're in, about the world around you. About what you can actually fix versus the things you have to accept, to work around, to stop beating yourself upside the head over. You can talk about it if you like, perhaps to share a revelation you've had or to ask for a second opinion on something you're still not completely certain isn't up to you to fix. But mostly… I just want you to think. To try to know the difference.//
[Open!]
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