fandomhigh | Practical Philosophy, Monday

Ender had always preferred to teach his classes outside whenever possible. When it became obvious the morning would be a little chilly but not rainy, he posted a note on his designated classroom's door pointing all the students towards the dorm lawn.

He sat down on the grass out there, legs folded. By his side was a bag full of sandwiches, just in case any student had missed breakfast. And there he waited, quiet and patient, until everyone had arrived.

"You'll notice I didn't bring any books," he said, once they had. "Because despite what the title of this class might imply, I'm not actually here to tell you about Hegel or Kant and what they were thinking. They might come up, but if they do, it's because they have had interesting ideas that might be useful to us."

He stretched his legs out. "My name is Andrew Wiggin, though some people call me Ender," he said, "And I don't bring books here because I don't think they have all that many answers. I don't spite them for that, because I don't exactly have a lot of answers of my own. What I have are questions, which are far more useful in the long run. You can keep asking questions as the situation changes - answers tend to be the same thing no matter when you check up on them."

He smiled wryly.

"This class is about questions," he said. "And it's about opening a dialogue with those questions. Everyone here has sat through something in their life that they have questions about - though whether they want to admit that is another thing entirely. We're here to talk about those questions as they come up. No more, no less."

He tilted his chin up - maybe at Cade, maybe at nothing in particular. "Of course, that means I expect all of you to participate," he said. "You don't have to share about yourself if you absolutely don't want to, though I'll have you know that it helps. But I expect you to talk along. If you don't, I'm not going to apologize for the kinds of questions I'll ask. While we're at it, I also won't tolerate shaming anyone in this class for any reason."

Having said that, though, Ender's mouth quirked up. "Enough with the threats," he said. "I don't believe in classic introductions - I think I know what most of your names are, and I'll learn the ones that I don't, and what year you're in is of absolutely no concern to me."

"Let's open a dialogue instead," he finished. "For some of you, this is all new. How is it working for you? Are you elated? Annoyed? Don't want to be here? Achingly happy to be here? And for those of you who aren't - how has the past year treated you? Has there been anything that made you cry or made you think or made you wonder?"

"We can talk about that. Or we can talk about something else. I'm open to talking about anything, as long as you think it's worth questioning. Because you can assume from here on in that I really don't know a thing; but maybe by educating me, you can find something worth educating yourself about."

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"This past year has been the first in a long time that I have remained in one place," Yeul said, smiling softly. "I have made friends here. It had not occurred to me that I would but I enjoy the change."

Edited 2013-05-13 10:45 (UTC)

"Why hadn't it occurred to you?" Ender asked. "Has it never been an issue for you?"

"I would not call making friends an issue," Yeul admitted, toying with the grass by her side, "though I suppose it could be. In my world, I am rarely in the presence of people other than my Guardian for more than a few days at a time."

She shrugged very slightly, as if to say that it was what it was.

"I suppose that coming here, I had not realized how staying would change anything."

"I suppose if moving around is the life you're used to, change might seem like more of the same," said Ender, who was supposing nothing and dipping into his own experiences. "Have you had a hard time adjusting, in the long term?"

"No," Yeul said, shaking her head. "I am very good at taking what comes as it comes. It has been different but situations being different is not something that disliking will help."

"Let me turn it around then," Ender mused, looking at her with interest. "Do you like this better than the way things were before?"

Yeul paused.

"It does not matter," she said, after a few moments, very softly. "What happens will happen."

Ender's mouth turned up in a tiny smile that actually managed to be genuine. "It certainly often seems that way," he said. "It's hard to embrace being happy or sad when you know the tides will change and then change again."

"Yes," she said agreeably. "I... find it simpler to always be on the same page, so to speak, emotionally."

"Safer, too, I imagine," Ender said gently. "I hope you still get some enjoyment out of it. Even if it's just the surprise of having friends."

"I enjoy many things," she said, feeling like that should be clear. "It is not that I cannot feel happy or sad."

"Forgive me, I never meant to imply that you couldn't," Ender said almost immediately. "I'm just trying to get to know you a little."

"I understand," she said, smiling again. "How I expressed myself was confusing. It is more... I do not linger over feelings, whether they be good or ill. And I do not bother with fear."

"Why not?" Ender asked.

"Many reasons," Yeul said, lowering her eyes briefly before glancing back up. "I suppose I began to think the way I do when I realized that fear helped nothing."

"That's not entirely true," Ender noted. "Fear is a mechanism that in and of itself is meant to keep us from hurtling ourselves into unnecessary danger."

"I know," she said, "but my options were to live constantly in fear or give it up. I chose to give it up."

Ender watched her for a long moment.

"Do you think you'll get hurt here again?" he asked. "That it's inevitable?"

"It is," Yeul said simply.

Ender briefly considered arguing, but one look at her face made it clear that would not-- be unwelcome, but unnecessary and, perhaps, missing the point. He wasn't trying to fix sprawling problems today - or any day. He was just trying to connect with his students (even if that connection was, as always, mostly one-sided).

But he made a note of it in the back of his mind.

He just nodded.

She smiled understandingly at him and settled back to listen to what other students had to say.

Practical Philosophy, Monday

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