fandomhigh | Library, Thursday

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Library, Thursday

Evan was still feeling pretty reserved after the whole maze thing. It was one thing to be kidnapped in a world that kind of accepted the heroes-and-villains thing as a mainstay. But Fandom was supposed to be his safe place. Even when Umbridge took the island over, things hadn't been too bad for him, but being trapped without his powers in a maze that was actively trying to kill him - that had killed people he knew and cared about - that was enough to leave him reeling.

So he was doing more quiet reading at the desk today. Even the books seemed to sense his mood and were more or less behaving themselves, today. Except for the occasional opportunity they'd grabbed to act out the ending of the last of the Space Battles prequel novelizations, which had kind of scarred Evan for life last week.

"You guys are jerks, you know that?"

Heroes were supposed to stay heroes, weren't they? Not...

... Well.

He was going to just ignore the books and get back to reading.

[Open!]

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But keep the volume down. It's totally a quiet day in here.

... Ignore that book that's doing a pantomime, 'NOOOOOOOOOOOO' in front of the aide desk. Evan certainly is.

Edited 2013-04-25 11:51 (UTC)

Unless you're a book that's being a jerk.

"Hi - dude, what's with the book?"

This was one of Victor's periodic efforts to check in on Evan and find something new to read. Of course, neither was going to happen as long as books were miming a light saber duel. That was the kind of thing that seized Victor's intention.

"They're rubbing it in," Evan mumbled, frowning before closing the book he was attempting to read and setting it down on his desk. "I finished reading the Space Battles prequel novelizations last week."

You know, where the chosen hero that he'd been fanboying for months went over to the dark side, killed a bunch of kids, and then turned into the greatest villain his galaxy had ever seen. That one.

"And so the books are putting on a show," Victor nodded. "Dios, I love Fandom's variety of making sense."

He leaned against a low shelf where he could keep watching the books. "I never read those," he said. "Saw the movies, that's it."

"I watched the first two movies," Evan replied, drumming his fingers against the top of his desk, "but I like reading more, so I thought I'd try the book instead. They give more insight about what's going in inside the heads of the characters, you know?"

Which might have been a mistake, in this particular case.

Victor nodded. "Right, but it's a lot harder to zone out if one of the characters is being an idiot."

"Or just... really, really horrible," Evan agreed, frowning down at the top of his desk. "I know it's just fiction. It shouldn't bug me so much. But I thought he was a hero, you know? One of the good guys."

And then he turned around and became Apoc-- er-- ~~meta for~~ Darth Vader, instead.

"Wait, you didn't know how the story ended?" Victor asked, frowning right back. "I thought everybody knew what happened next."

Which almost certainly was his way of avoiding dealing with Evan's larger point.

"It's kind of funny how much pop culture you miss out on when you grow up on a small farm in the middle of nowhere in a virtual reality designed to keep you from getting any ideas," Evan replied, wrinkling his nose. "I thought Space Battles was new for the longest time."

"Good point. It's not like he needed you to pass as a cool kid," Victor nodded.

Not that he thought it was one of Ultron's foremost concerns either, but apparently his idea of a 'normal childhood' to build into Victor's memories had included Space Battles. Or ... something.

"Okay, so you're reading the story for the first time, and -- yeah." He wrinkled his nose. "I can see where it'd suck if you didn't now it was coming. You don't expect people to just go dark like that. There have to be signs, right?"

"You would think," Evan agreed with a little nod. "I mean, he wasn't bad until he was horrible, and then he was really horrible. It was... I don't know. It kind of scared me."

"I don't think that's how it happens," Victor said, hearing the unstated worry. (And possibly projecting a little.) "The way you grow up, the person you are ... that all matters, right? You don't just change."

"No, I guess you don't," Evan murmured. "But maybe there are things that are big enough that could change a person. Or... at least show them that their upper limit isn't anywhere near where they used to think it really was."

"Maybe." Victor sounded resigned to the possibility, at least. "But you see people find an upper limit way higher than they knew it was, too, right?"

Evan nodded a tiny bit.

"I guess... I don't know. I know he's not even real. He's just made-up for some movies that aren't even close to being realistic anyhow, right?"

But maybe that was a sticking point, too. Evan still wasn't sure what was and wasn't real, these days.

"The whole thing's a big fairy tale," Victor nodded. "Like Cinderella or Paul Bunyan or something."

A fraction of a pause, then: "But if it gets to you, it gets to you."

"That's what people tell stories for, right? To get to you?"

Evan was fidgeting a little, now, his eyes back on the top of his desk.

"I guess this one just gets to me a little more than some others might. I wanted to think he could be the hero and then I was wrong, and that's not something I want to get into the habit of being wrong about."

"That makes two of us," Victor said, brushing hair out of his eyes. "You don't want to start following somebody around who's going to stab you in the back. Even in a story."

"Even in a story," Evan echoed quietly. "And I should know better by now. People are... are liars. I can't just go assuming the best of everyone just because they seem like good people at first glance."

That had been a horrible lesson to learn.

"Did something happen." Victor asked, then thought to clarify because of course something had happened. "Recently. You sound really down."

There was a moment's silence, before Evan hitched his shoulders up a little in a shrug.

"I've just been thinking," he admitted. "The... the maze thing probably started it. Sholeh got pretty badly hurt in there, and I think it was someone she really trusted that did it. A-and I tried not to think about it too much, but I can't help but think about all of the people back at the Jean Grey School who must have known something about me but decided to keep it a secret anyway, and it's just... tiring, not being able to do anything about things like that. Not being able to see it coming, when it should be so obvious that someone out there is doing something to hurt people."

"Oh." Victor hesitated, there, because he couldn't argue with any of that. "Yeah. I got killed in the dungeons. Still really bothered by that and ... other things."

Mostly what Gert's ghost had said.

"Maybe people just suck."

He didn't honest;y think that, but arguing this kind of thing, being a cheerleader for something he wasn't sure he believed in, was going to make him tired. Easier to let himself fully feel his pessimism for a moment.

La la la la laaaa.

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