fandomhigh | Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day: Part I

Entry tags:

!event: welcome picnic

Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day: Part I

It was a new year, and with the new year came the new spring term, and Fandom High was all set to welcome its new students, along with those just returning from holiday trips home. It was a familiar setting for the latter bunch: there was the requisite bonfire, with tables and chairs scattered around it, as well as the buffet table with ~~moldable~~ warm food and drinks.

And of course, name tags and lists of Big and Little Siblings as well as roommates. Yep, the weather was okay for early January, and Fandom was all ready to celebrate the start of a new term.

[OCD up! This is part one of the picnic, specifically for meeting siblings, roommates, and teachers. The rest of the picnic is happening here and here, in an effort to keep browsers from breaking for as long as possible. Since it's outside, the picnic is open to all students, teachers, and townies!]

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"I try not to read the newspaper when I can avoid it," Jono intoned, raising an eyebrow. "Too depressing. And I have seen a doctor for this already, you know. I mean, th'sling didn't materialize out of thin air or anything."

Of course, this being Fandom, that probably wouldn't have surprised anybody, anyhow.

Navaan sniffed. "And what was that doctor's qualifications?" she demanded. "How many adventures had they been on? People have they laid? Have they ever killed the fun god? Hunh? Hunh?"

Navaan didn't think so!

"They... went to school. To learn medicine." Navaan was getting the most wary side-eye Jono had given anyone in at least a week. That was a big accomplishment, really. "I'm fairly certain killing the fun god doesn't have anything to do with it."

At least, not last he checked.

"Bah," Navaan said, judging the sun had gone down enough to push her mask out of the way. "What can anyone learn about being a doctor in school? The most important stuff can't be taught! Only experienced!"

Beat.

"Well, okay, sex can probably be taught. But if you're learning it in school, you're doing it wrong. Unless you go to the best school ever!"

HEY! HEY FANDOM! NAVAAN HAD AN AWESOME IDEA FOR A SUMMER COURSE!

"I believe that's half of what going to college is about," Jono mused, glancing up thoughtfully at the sky before looking back at the now-unmasked... Doctor.

Really, he wouldn't know.

"Or at least, it would've been, if I'd gone for more than a week." A beat. "You figure saving lives involves sex, hm?"

Navaan gave him a look that suggested he was an idiot for even asking that. "Have you never had sex, then?"

Seriously. What did the doctors in this crazy place do?

"Not typically while I'm slowly bleeding to death," Jono replied, eyebrow raised. "Generally, I prefer to patch up the more serious wounds first. Call me old-fashioned that way..."

Really, Jonothon's sex life, such as it was, was hardly what anyone would consider 'old-fashioned.' But he preferred to refrain from classifying it as first-aid all the same.

"Well, duh," Navaan said, rolling her eyes. "Also, blood makes for a terrible lube. And that's just wasteful to boot."

Navaan. Navaan. Why did you talk?

"But what makes you feel better after all the stitching and patching and bandages. Well, okay, morphine. But that's only for the good patients."

"I'm generally the one on the receiving end of the medical attention," Jono noted. "I'm just fine with the morphine."

No. No, he really didn't need morphine. At all. Ever. Jonothon and drugs were a terrible but hilarious combination.

Karla would completely agree with the 'hilarious' part of that statement.

"You should stop by the clinic sometime," Navaan decided. "Let a real doctor look you over. Unless you're in dire need of medical attention now?"

Look, Navaan had no shame and it had been about a month. Couldn't blame her for trying!

"I have this sneaking suspicion that your idea of medical attention is something wholly inappropriate for this sort of gathering," Jono replied, raising an eyebrow at her. "I might stop by the clinic at some point, perhaps. For, er, proper tending to."

Sex really wasn't on the agenda. So far as he was concerned, it usually wasn't.

"It's not a carnival?" Navaan asked, looking around. "I guess that explains the lack of drugs and nudity." She sounded very disappointed by that. "Though, believe me, I can tend to you as properly as you could want."

"It's a welcome picnic for the new students at the school," Jono replied, eyebrow raised. "And I'm here supervising, at the moment..."

Though he had to admit, it was tempting to take a walk. Hobble. Whatever. It was getting dark, and he had been here all day, after all.

"Oh, right. That's a school. Pity, though." Navaan said with a nod. And a smile that showed off some very sharp teeth. "I am a very good doctor."

She was an expert on crunt-knockling. Both front and rear knockling.

Jono didn't know anything about knockling... probably... but he was giving those teeth of hers a wary looking-over.

Vampires always tended to put him a little on-edge. And not just because Dracula issues seemed to run in the family.

"Yes, well... Perhaps I'll run into you at the clinic sometime, then. For some... doctoring, of some sort."

Oh, silly Jono! She wasn't going to bite you!

...No, okay, she totally was, but it was a good kind of bite. Not a bad kind. Look, those teeth of hers had left scars behind and still brought people back for more.

"I also go to the bars a lot!" she offered. "If you show up there instead!"

Come on, Jon. Did Navaan seem all that dangerous? Really?

She seemed small, pointy in the mouth-parts, and a bit on the desperate side. That didn't scream danger to Jono, granted. At least, not while he was there talking to her.

"I do sometimes go to the bars, myself," he mused. "Less since I got hurt, granted. My bar of choice is generally Caritas, but the Devil's Nest is less of a hike."

His dilemma, Navaan. His dilemma.

Less desperate and more gleefully enthusiastic. Sex was fun, Jono! How did you not know that?

"Which is why you need to come to the clinic to get it all looked at," Navaan said, literally winking at him as she did. "As a doctor, I promise you'll only get hurt in the funnest of ways."

NUDGE NUDGE WINK WINK YOU KNOW WHAT SHE MEANS?

SAY NO MORE WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE.

Still, Jono raised an eyebrow, not entirely convinced.

"If this wasn't a completely inappropriate setting for this sort of conversation, I might have to let you know what my idea of 'the funnest of ways' is, and see what you make of it. Of course, surrounded by students as we are..."

Navaan looked around at the people sharing their picnic table. Most of them seemed pretty old to her. "...We shouldn't talk about these things unless we're willing to share?" she hazarded.

Wrong life lesson, Navaan. That was for snacks, not sex.

Well, they were at the teachers' table.

"I don't know that I'd be willing to share with most of these people," Jono intoned, looking at the other members of the faculty. "Not that they're not attractive, all in their own way..."

"Yeah they are," Navaan agreed, eyeing a few of them herself. Hello, Clint's arms. "Normally, that's a thing you say about ugly people who have nice personalities, but that's not true here. I don't think there's anyone on the island I wouldn't eat with a straw."

Beat.

"A spoon."

Beat.

"Not eat at all, at least not like that."

She didn't want you to get the wrong idea about her, Jono!

Riiight, vampire lady. Right. Jono was just going to eye Navaan out of the corner of his eye again.

"Mmhmm."

He was completely, absolutely convinced. Yep.

"What?" Navaan said, crossing her arms over her chest and looking offended. "I don't. You can ask the monks!"

...Who weren't on the island. But details.

"They're my little guys! I protected them! You can even ask the merc who hates fun! She'll back me up! And call you a sad tosser for doubting me!"

Okay, probably not for doubting Navaan. That was legit. But Greer would likely find some way to work that into the conversation anyway.

"I've met more than my share of mercenaries who hate fun," Jono noted, "and a good many more who don't. And the one thing they all have in common, luv, is that any single one of them will back you up if you pay them well enough."

Well. Maybe not that one with the mouth.

"So." He dropped his head a little, leaning forward so that he was as eye-to-eye with her as he could get without shifting his entire body around. "You're a vampire who doesn't eat people."

Still not entirely convinced, but he was willing to listen to whatever she had to say, sure.

Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day: Part I

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