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fandomhigh2005-11-28 10:02 am
names-ash.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2005-11-28 10:02 am
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Ash's Art Appreciations, Lecture #9
Ash paces back and forth in front of the classroom, until he's satisfied with the number of students in the seats. He then stops pacing, opens a book, and begins reading.
He's reading "Green Eggs and Hamelt".
When he is finished, he shuts the book and asks the questions for discussion.
"Alright knuckleheads. Say you were making a still-life painting of eggs and ham, and you decided to paint the eggs green. Here are your questions:
One, would Dr. Seuss sue you?
Two, Would it be art?
Three, Would it taste good?
Four, Would you paint it on a boat?
Five, Would you paint it with a goat?
Six, Why does my TA get naked for other people?
Seven, What would Brian Boitano Do?
Eight, Who's on First?
Nine, What is the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow?
Ten, Why are there so many songs about rainbows?
Eleven, Why do I keep dreaming of Leonardo Da Vinci coming back to life and beating me to death with an easel?
Twelve, What did you think of the book?
Alright, discuss!
He's reading "Green Eggs and Ham
When he is finished, he shuts the book and asks the questions for discussion.
"Alright knuckleheads. Say you were making a still-life painting of eggs and ham, and you decided to paint the eggs green. Here are your questions:
One, would Dr. Seuss sue you?
Two, Would it be art?
Three, Would it taste good?
Four, Would you paint it on a boat?
Five, Would you paint it with a goat?
Six, Why does my TA get naked for other people?
Seven, What would Brian Boitano Do?
Eight, Who's on First?
Nine, What is the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow?
Ten, Why are there so many songs about rainbows?
Eleven, Why do I keep dreaming of Leonardo Da Vinci coming back to life and beating me to death with an easel?
Twelve, What did you think of the book?
Alright, discuss!
no subject
Why? I haven't done anything! Honestly!
Two, Would it be art?
That would be entirely in the eye of the
teacherbeholder, sir.Three, Would it taste good?
Unless you're into the taste of paper and tempura, uh, no.
Four, Would you paint it on a boat?
Is this part of the assignment?
Five, Would you paint it with a goat?
Is this going to be on the test?
Six, Why does my TA get naked for other people?
Because they're not you?I have no idea.Seven, What would Brian Boitano Do?
He would, of course, chuck as much wood as a wood-Canuck could... which I imagine wouldn't be very much really.
Eight, Who's on First?
Don't you think that's a rather personal question you should be asking her? I certainly don't know.
Nine, What is the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow?
Dude! You time swallows?!? Uh, I guess it depends on what's in your mouth at the time...
Ten, Why are there so many songs about rainbows?
Gremlin bites *nods knowingly*
Eleven, Why do I keep dreaming of Leonardo Da Vinci coming back to life and beating me to death with an easel?
Because only in dreams can true justice and righteousness reign over the earth?Uh, maybe you ate the green eggs before bed?Twelve, What did you think of the book?
Uh, it was short?