Ash's Art Appreciations, Lecture #9

[names-ash.livejournal.com]

Ash paces back and forth in front of the classroom, until he's satisfied with the number of students in the seats. He then stops pacing, opens a book, and begins reading.

He's reading "Green Eggs and Hamelt".

When he is finished, he shuts the book and asks the questions for discussion.

"Alright knuckleheads. Say you were making a still-life painting of eggs and ham, and you decided to paint the eggs green. Here are your questions:

One, would Dr. Seuss sue you?

Two, Would it be art?

Three, Would it taste good?

Four, Would you paint it on a boat?

Five, Would you paint it with a goat?

Six, Why does my TA get naked for other people?

Seven, What would Brian Boitano Do?

Eight, Who's on First?

Nine, What is the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow?

Ten, Why are there so many songs about rainbows?

Eleven, Why do I keep dreaming of Leonardo Da Vinci coming back to life and beating me to death with an easel?

Twelve, What did you think of the book?


Alright, discuss!

Comments

[positive-angel.livejournal.com]

One, would Dr. Seuss sue you?

Unless he comes back from the dead? No. His family might.

Two, Would it be art?

What does the National Academy of the Arts say these days?

Three, Would it taste good?

Green eggs? I'm not going to find out.

Four, Would you paint it on a boat?

If I was paid, I suppose I would.

Five, Would you paint it with a goat?

If the goat asked...

Six, Why does my TA get naked for other people?

Coach...we should probably talk.

Seven, What would Brian Boitano Do?

If he was here right now,
He'd make a plan
And he'd follow through,
That's what Brian Boitano'd do. (http://home.usadatanet.net/~paruby/06_boitano.htm)

Eight, Who's on First?

Yes.

Nine, What is the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow?

African or European? (That was just too easy...)

Ten, Why are there so many songs about rainbows?

...and what's on the other side?

Eleven, Why do I keep dreaming of Leonardo Da Vinci coming back to life and beating me to death with an easel?

Coach...we really really should talk...

Twelve, What did you think of the book?

You wrote a book?

[names-ash.livejournal.com]

Ash waves "Green Eggs and Ham" at Chihaya.

"This book. I don't write books. I have enough trouble writing sentences."