Practical Mythology, 1/11/12, Period 2, [Class Session 2]

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

Again the class met in the Danger Shop, but this time the simulation was something far more extravagant.

"Welcome to Mount Olympus!" Hercules declared as the class made their way in. A replica of the throne room in Olympus, complete with seats for each of the major gods... and even some chairs for the students, too. Each of the seats for the gods were occupied, but with wax figure statues of each of the gods instead of actual simulations of the deities themselves.

"And now, I'd like to tell you a bit about the gods I know..." And before he knew it, Hercules was singing.

"These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know
These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know"

Hercules pointed to the statue of figure of Zeus, situated in the largest seat.

"My dad Zeus, here
He's god of all the sky
He's also often full of beer
And if you anger him you will fry!

These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know
These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know"

He moved to the figure of Hera, next to Zeus.

"Hera,
My father's angry wife
She's not exactly all to blame
Their marriage is full of strife!

These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know
These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know"

He danced over to the figure of Ares, the face clouded by a giant helm.
"Some of them are jerk-wads!"

He moved on to the figure of Dionysus.

"But some of them are fun,"

He jigged his way next to Venus, whose figure was clad in a very revealing outfit.

"Some are goddesses of love,"

He pointed over at the seated figure of Athena.

"But others are evil bums!

These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know
These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know"

He'd made his way to the figure of Poseidon.

"This is Poseidon
Lord of all the sea
I saved his life not long ago
And he hangs with manatees."

He started doing a soft-shoe routine in his boots against the simulated marble floor.

"These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know
These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know.

He'd ended up next to Hephaestus.

"Hephaestus,
he's an ugly jerk."

Herc just stood there for a moment, seemingly confident in the idea that was all anyone needed to know.

"These are the gods I know, I know
These are the gods I know."

That was when Hercules snapped out of it and coughed. "I... that was not how I planned on doing that," he said. "There's probably a lot more about the gods you want to know. Including some of the names. I didn't even touch on Hermes or Artemis or Demeter. Or even lord Pluto, who does not have a seat on Olympus. So... question time! I will share my expertise with you all. What do you want to know about whom?"

He raised a finger. "Just please don't ask me about the time my father seduced a woman as a golden rainfall. That's something no one needs to hear about."

[ooc: OCD a-coming up. Have at it!]

Comments

Talk Amongst Yourselves

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

Possibly Stare at the singing and dancing teacher.

[seaweed-demigod.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Percy was gonna stare. He was just glad Hercules hadn't said anything too bad about his dad so he was just gonna stare and maybe laugh a little and remember some of this so he could tell people later because wow.

[wesleynotponcy.livejournal.com]

Wesley stared. And turned to the person next to him to share his disbelief.

"What on Earth?"

[seaweed-demigod.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, uh..." Percy stared a while longer before glancing over at Wesley. "Yeah, I don't have a clue. Points for creativity maybe?"

[wesleynotponcy.livejournal.com]

"Surely nowhere near enough to compensate for the, er, lack of points in... everything else."

Well, that wasn't nice.

[seaweed-demigod.livejournal.com]

"He's not really like the Hercules I heard of," Percy admitted, sounding amused, at least. "I wonder what Olympus would think if they heard about this."

He'd have to think about sharing that with some people.

[wesleynotponcy.livejournal.com]

"Not much, I expect," Wesley hypothesized. Wisely. "He's rather more... upbeat than I expected."

[seaweed-demigod.livejournal.com]

Percy snickered and glanced at Wesley. "Were you expecting doom and gloom or something? Hercules is a hero. He's gotta have some optimism in there."

[wesleynotponcy.livejournal.com]

"...yes, but he danced."

Danced, Percy.

[seaweed-demigod.livejournal.com]

"...well."

Yeah, he couldn't really explain that.

"Yeah, that was weird. Uh, it's good exercise?"

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[abitlowkey]

Loki was having none of this silly musical enchantment, thank you. As soon as Hercules stopped prancing around, he was leaving and hiding from everyone.

Even Ikol.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[trickydemigod.livejournal.com]

In all honesty, Luke didn't really think that was all that odd. He'd been in Hercules's classes like three times now, he knew the dude was a weirdo.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[abitlowkey]

"How do you film things using your phone?" Loki asked, phone at the ready. "My brother would enjoy this far more than I."

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[trickydemigod.livejournal.com]

Luke grinned, pleasantly surprised to see that Loki had been taking advantage of current technology. For some reason he imagined Norse gods being strictly old fashioned. Must be the way they talked.

"You'll wanna look for a button that looks like a video camera," Luke said, leaning over to get a look. "At least that's what it looks like on mine."

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[abitlowkey]

They were terribly old fashioned about it, though. Loki just happened to have a Tumblr addiction and the knowledge his brother dearest was forced to carry a phone by his compatriots, Iron Man and Captain America.

And was forever confounded by Angry Birds. Loki was kind and did not flaunt his skill in such arenas.

"Most excellent," Loki replied with a grin that boded well for no one. "Do you think he would be cross if I put this on the YouTube?"

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[trickydemigod.livejournal.com]

Luke looked over at Hercules. "I...actually think he might be flattered by it."

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[abitlowkey]

Loki made a face because that wouldn't be any fun. "He could do with a little of the auto-tune."

And sound like Ke$ha.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[trickydemigod.livejournal.com]

"You should tell him that," Luke said. "I bet he'd pout."

Because he pouted at Luke last week and he still thought that was weird.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[abitlowkey]

And no one wanted to deal with a pouting Hercules.

Loki tapped his fingers on his thigh three times as he considered it. "Aahaahaha." A beat. "...I am going to raze this island to the ground if it thinks it can make me sing."

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[trickydemigod.livejournal.com]

Luke lifted an eyebrow. "You must really hate singing."

Personally he wanted to hear Loki sing one of those lame songs the minstrels seemed to sing in every bar when he played Skyrim.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[ancientbschamp.livejournal.com]

Gabrielle wasn't staring, but she did smother a smile behind her hand for the duration of the musical number.

"I still don't quite get how this happens outside of Illusia . . ."

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[kestrelswolf.livejournal.com]

Firekeeper wasn't staring so much as... watching with amused enjoyment. Music was one of her favorite things about humans (or the gods of humans, she supposed), after all.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[taseredagod.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Darcy was going to stare. She had been randomly singing all morning, but for her that was almost normal. But this was a teacher singing and dancing and it was just weird.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[endsthegame]

Ender was just... going to sit here and sigh.

He'd noted his fair share of, ahem, singing that morning.

Re: Talk Amongst Yourselves

[willbethenight.livejournal.com]

Bruce was just going to keep quiet. It seemed prudent.