fandomhigh | Professor Chaucer: Office Hours

Whatever I can do, Ten. Just tell me, and I'll do it.

[At the Doctor's blush, and his next words, Geoff looks away and fidgets a bit in his chair.] I don't think that at all, Ten. I told you -- it was my decision to talk. You didn't force me. [He meets Ten's eyes again.] You were not being a bastard.

[He chews on his lower lip.] I keep picking at people, Geoff. I always have. I prod them, pull away their defenses and insist upon things. It keeps getting me into trouble.

[Troubled eyes meet his.] But I'm in trouble a lot, both in my mind and in reality.

Funny how the trouble in our minds always causes us more grief than the trouble in reality.

I'm not angry, Ten.

[He shakes his head.] No...no, you're not. But...

Whatever. Not important.

[Geoff moves his chair closer and reaches out, taking hold of Ten's forearms. He's smiling, but his voice is serious.] Ten, you are coming perilously close to finding out exactly how much patience I have.

Tell. me. what. is. wrong.

[Oh, god, why did he have to do that?] I'm guessing not much? [nervous laugh]

[He looks down at Geoff's hands, then up into his eyes.] I...I don't usually tell people what I'm thinking, Geoff. It's too dangerous, most of the time.

[He looks deep into Ten's eyes, and then nudges the door closed with his foot.]

I'm not afraid of what you're thinking, Ten.

I am. [He looks away and down, reading a bookshelf from a distance.]

[Geoff leans in closer, and his voice grows softer.]

Look at me, Ten.

[The Doctor's brow furrows, just for a second, wincing. Then he slowly turns back to look at Geoff, face less than a foot away.]

[His voice is very low, so quiet that no one further away than Ten would be likely to hear him.]

I swear I won't judge you, Ten. And I won't hate you, or run away, or stop being your friend. Just tell me.

You know...what you told me the other night... [He can feel Geoff's body, he's that damn close the bastard, and it makes this harder and easier to do at the same time.] Did I ever say I disagreed?

[There's a long pause, as Geoff considers how to respond.] No. I suppose you didn't. Is that...is that what's bothering you, then? That, um, you don't disagree?

[The Doctor rolls his eyes skyward, in exasperation.] No. That's not bloody it, and I just can't...

Yes you can. The words don't have to always be pretty, Ten.

[He rests his forehead against the Doctor's.] I never told Will how I felt about him, because I didn't how to say it, even to myself. And I'll probably regret it for the rest of my life. Don't add a regret like that to yours. They're only words, and they don't need to go any further than here.

[He closes his eyes, opening them to look at Geoff, whose proximity is not bad...but not exactly comfortable either...] You know, don't you...

Fine...I fancy you, Geoff. You're quite brilliant and handsome, and very talented, and you make me want to muss up your hair every time I see you. And I fancy you. [The tight feeling in his chest, however, doesn't seem to go away.]

I fancy you too, Ten.

[grins a little] Muss up my hair, huh?

[exasperated] Well, I knew that. And yes. Muss up your hair. [He reaches up and tousles Geoff's hair, casually at first, but then with fingers moving a little slower. Then he moves his hand away.] Like so.

I see.

[Geoff closes his eyes for a moment.]

So, how is it that this was such a difficult thing to tell me?

[He lets out a very, very long sigh.] Well...I do have a girlfriend, for one. Who gets quite jealous regarding certain matters. But she and I...[he thinks a minute] have a kind of understanding--feelings are fine. It's acting on them that's not fine. So she's not really the problem.

It's more like...[another long pause] It's been a very, very long time since I was last with a man. And until a few months ago, it was centuries since I'd done more than kiss a woman. Suffice it to say, when you spend nine hundred or so years keeping that sort of thing--the 'hello, mister, my name's the Doctor and I think you're quite sexy' thing--to yourself...it becomes habit.

[chuckles softly] I can understand how that might be.

So...we can handle this. I have faith is us.

[The Doctor pulls back so he can look Geoff straight in the eye, but his face is still only inches away.] How do you mean? There's little that can be done, isn't there?

Yes, that's probably true. [sighs] But that doesn't mean we have to avoid each other, or ~~emo all over everything~~ let it change the fact that we're friends.

Well, of course not. [He runs a hand through his hair, giving Geoff an 'oh please' look.] But it's just going to sit there between us.

That's what I meant when I said I was sorry that things aren't different. But we're here and now.

And things are the way they are. [Geoff smiles] And if this...stays there between us, then we learn to work around it. Like adults. [grins]

Professor Chaucer: Office Hours

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