Ethics class [Tuesday, November 8, 2011, first period]

[sith_happened]

When Anakin came into the classroom today, he was not alone. He was wheeling in more than a half dozen droid babies in their own strollers. "It's that time of year again," he said, not even trying not to look amused. "Droid babies. You make fifty different decisions a day when faced with a child--what will you feed them, how strictly you enforce bedtimes, how often you interact with them, how much leeway you grant them in exploring their environments--and as every parenting booklet will tell you, each decision you make is fraught with peril about causing lasting damage to the child's delicate psyche."

He rolled his eyes. "If you think about it too hard, you'll get paralyzed by the responsibility. These droid babies have been programmed to be about six months old--they can crawl, but slowly, and are putting absolutely everything into their mouths. They eat formula about once every four hours, are exploring the wonders of solid food and are generally sleeping through the night."

If you didn't annoy Anakin, of course, in which case, the baby would cry alllll the time. He gestured at the back of the classroom, which had been filled with baby food, diapers, clothing, baby-proofing equipment, cribs, toys, and various other baby stuff.

"As you can see, six month-old babies do not travel light," he added. "The average cost of a baby's first year is rough ten thousand dollars in modern money," he continued, "and adding an element of budgeting will often bring moral debates into relief as, for instance, the cost of a babysitter is weighed against a night out and trying to balance the mental health of the parents against the child's ever-demanding needs. Each pair has been given 200 fake dollars to budget out for your week, and before you ask, no, this will not pay for childcare at the center in town, and no, you cannot supplement with your own incomes. It will, however, be needed to pay for baby's various...things. I provide the baby, ten diapers, a day's supply of formula, a pack 'n play that can be used both as a bed and a containment unit for when the baby is getting into too many things, and two changes of clothes for each of them. You must work with your partner to decide on the name of your child, and then what you will be buying from the store in the back of the room to prepare for a week with a baby."

He grinned. "May the Force be with you." His expression turned a little more steely as he focused on the engineers in the class. "And no trying to modify the droids. It'll set off an alarm that only I can turn off."

Comments

Come and Get Your Droid Babies!

[sith_happened]

His is an evil laugh.

Lex Luthor & Angelica Jones

[sith_happened]

And your baby boy.

Re: Lex Luthor & Angelica Jones

[hasadestiny]

Lex, at least, knew how to hold a baby.

Even if Julian had never gotten as big as these droids.

Re: Lex Luthor & Angelica Jones

[whitequeensfire.livejournal.com]

"Um, hi," Angelica said, peering at the baby and trying not to flail. She'd never even babysat before. "I'm Angelica. Guess we're parents."

At least she hadn't gotten paired with Topher.

Toby Logan & Annie Edison

[sith_happened]

And your baby girl.

Re: Toby Logan & Annie Edison

[annieadderall.livejournal.com]

"Um," Annie said eloquently. She was pretty sure she knew the basics of how to deal with babies (such as cooing at Jims and calling him cute), but um.

Re: Toby Logan & Annie Edison

[godgavemecable.livejournal.com]

"...About sums it up, yeah," Toby said, eyeing the baby dubiously.

Hank Venture & Jack Carter

[sith_happened]

And your baby boy.

Re: Hank Venture & Jack Carter

[exactlyaverage.livejournal.com]

"A droid baby?" Jack said picking up the... thing and giving him a curious look. "Seriously?"

Hanna Marin & Juliet Darling

[sith_happened]

And your baby girl.

Re: Hanna Marin & Juliet Darling

[twintuitionist.livejournal.com]

"Aww, she's cute," Juliet said, reaching to pick the baby up and bounce her around a little. "Do you think he's serious about not paying for childcare?"

She liked babies, but only to a certain point.

Katniss Everdeen & Lucrezia Borgia

[sith_happened]

And your baby boy.

Re: Katniss Everdeen & Lucrezia Borgia

[holy-daughter.livejournal.com]

Lucrezia was looking a bit pale, and not wanting to hold the child. It seemed to be mocking her. She feared that, if it cried too insistently, she might begin to leak milk from her breasts; that had taken far too long to stop of its own volition, but stop it had. And now there was the danger of resuming.

"How should we begin?" she asked her fellow mother, hoping that her voice sounded suitably steady.

Kenzi & Luke Castellan

[sith_happened]

And your baby girl.

Re: Kenzi & Luke Castellan

[trickydemigod.livejournal.com]

This wasn't exactly the best time for Luke to be even pretending to take care of a kid but, whatever, he wouldn't feel all that guilty if this thing ended up abandoned somewhere if he had other things to do.

Mercy Thompson & Peter Wiggin

[sith_happened]

And your baby boy.

Re: Mercy Thompson & Peter Wiggin

[walkswithcoyote]

Oh man. Mercy went up to get her baby. Fabulous. And with Peter Wiggins - who admittedly she didn't really know except from radio, but still.

Nathan Young & Petra West

[sith_happened]

And your baby girl.

Re: Nathan Young & Petra West

[tripledmyself.livejournal.com]

This fucking place loved giving him kids. More specifically, it loved giving him girls and he was fucking sick of it. He was gonna shove this thing in a drawer, if he could.

Princess Rosella & Seifer Almasy

[sith_happened]

And your baby boy.

Re: Princess Rosella & Seifer Almasy

[knight-fatali.livejournal.com]

Seifer picked up the droid baby and held it out, looking it over. "Well, I hope you're not a screamer," he told the vaguely cute thing. "What do we name him?" he asked, looking at his partner.

Richie Ryan & Tony Stark

[sith_happened]

And your baby girl.

Re: Richie Ryan & Tony Stark

[hoorayimrich.livejournal.com]

"...cool." Sorry, Anakin. This will not be the droid you're looking for by the end of the week.

Topher Brink, Single Dad

[sith_happened]

And your baby boy.

Re: Topher Brink, Single Dad

[dollpocalypse]

Topher wasn't glaring over at Richie. Really. At least not obviously.

He was, however, working on rewiring the crying thing immediately, which set off a horrible howling noise that he had no idea how to fix.

Yeah. People were lucky not to have to share this task with him.