http://ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandomhigh2011-09-26 09:25 am

Cultural Understanding, Monday.

"Hello, everyone," Alistair greeted, sounding fairly chipper. He was a big fan - a conoisseur, if you may - of the subject matter coming up. You know, the reason why they were in the Danger Shop, with a shut door behind Alistair and Morrigan leading to places unknown. "Today, we'll step off the philosophy and the theology for once, and talk about something a bit more practical. Food! Everybody loves food."

"Theoretically, everyone eats food," Morrigan added. "Unless you are a spirit of some sort, in which case, we look forward to hearing from you today about your alternate means of subsistence."

"Or not," Alistair replied. "If you're some stray Fade spirit looking to cause trouble, let's... go with not."

"Each culture has different culinary tastes," Morrigan said, trying to bring Alistair back on track - even if it was her fault he went off in the first place. "I hope you brought your favorite recipes as you were handwavily told to do. Today, everyone is cooking something representative of their home."

Hey, Alistair was totally on track. He lived on track! He-- ...

Was easily distractible, shut up. "Because food isn't something you can talk about," he said. "You have to taste it." He waved his arm vaguely at the door behind him. "We should have that stocked with whatever food items the Danger Shop knows about, so sorry if we're missing tentacled purple potatoes or some other delicacy from your home world."

"Everyone has to try and taste at least one dish not from their own world," Morrigan continued. "And yes, Alistair and I have to prepare food as well."

A beat.

Alistair narrowed his eyes at her. Expressively. "Are you," he said, suspiciously, "just doing this to poison us all? I knew it!"

Morrigan just stared at him. "Do you even listen to yourself when you speak?"

"Oh, come on," Alistair retorted. "You expect me to believe you can cook?"

"Aye, and well," she retorted. "Do you think I leap from roof to roof, stealing pies from the windows of villagers to feed myself?"

"Morrigan, 'Witch of the Wilds'," he didn't actually make the airquotes, but he did give that title a funny inflection, "Standing in the kitchen, making pies? Yeah, right."

"I didn't say I make pies, but I can cook," she replied mildly. "'Tis not that different from brewing potions, I assure you."

"Hey, I've learned how to cook." Or skewer animals and leave them over an open fire until they were tasty, but po-tay-to, po-tah-to. "So what do you do?"

"You'll find out, now won't you?" Morrigan answered, giving him a slight smirk. "May the best chef prevail."
"If you poison me," Alistair said, his chin high for his closing statement, "I'll know."

Yeah, she'll be really impressed by that, boyo.
momslilassassin: (Default)

Re: Activity: COOK!

[personal profile] momslilassassin 2011-09-26 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Ben had been told by him roommate chosen to make a salad today: lettuce was easy, and so were croutons, and really, who didn't like Xizor salad oh god, the punning, the punning?

The Danger Shop couldn't replicate Hocekureem Sea salt, so he was using regular salt. It couldn't make that big a difference, right?