fandomhigh | Aesthetics of Badassery

Bobby was not a badass. Anyone who had ever met him knew that, and he knew it more than most. But he was somehow the TA for this class, and goshdarnit, he was going to give it a shot.

Instead of Mr. Bond, Bobby was standing at the front of the room with 6 chessboards carefully set up with all their pieces.

"Hi guys," he said with a dorky little wave. "So Mr. Bond isn't here today. Obviously. And so I'm going to teach the class. I don't know of a lot of things that are badass - other than volunteering and getting involved in your political process because changing the world and making it a better place is the most badass thing I can think of. Decisions are made by those who show up."

He paused. "But that's not what I'm going to talk about today ~~no matter how much I want to~~. Today I want to talk about chess. Chess doesn't seem like that badass a game - it's just a board game, right? But chess is one of the closest ways you can get to fighting a war without any casualties. And chess is the best way to get to know someone else. If you're paying attention to your partner's strategy and moves, you can figure out how their brain works - and then use then when dealing with them in other situations." Or so he'd heard. He hadn't exactly figured out how yet.

Bobby gave a remarkably succinct explanation of the history of chess and how to get started on a game, which pieces move where, etc. He summed up with "uh, so if there are any questions? I can answer them. Otherwise it'd be cool if everyone wanted to pair up and try a game. I put a sheet with all the ways the pieces can move by every board in case you want to refer to it again."

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Who's just relieved that this class involves clothes, (~~Caroline~~).

Caroline always wore clothes. It wasn't her fault Bobby didn't know that bathing suits counted as appropriate beach wear.

But today she was dressed as adorably as she could manage with typically scary (http://www.lulus.com/images/large/shMOarizonablacksuedea.JPG) shoes and staring down at her young friend with disappointment. "Seriously, Bobby? Chess? Battleship is more badass."

"Battleship is a game of luck!" Bobby protested instantly. "It pretends to be a war game, but the name isn't everything! Chess is a game of skill and tactics. You have to outthink your opponent."

He was attempting to focus all the way up where her eyes were since someone was wearing the highest heels ever.

The highest and most amazing of heels.

"But nothing explodes in chess," she pointed out. "There's just the eventual sacrifice of the one female on the board to save the stupid king. And she's just a glorified pawn anyway. Shouldn't you be arguing how chess is demeaning to women or something?" Yeah, so not her argument.

"Things don't have to explode to be cool," he replied. "And she's hardy a glorified pawn! She's the most powerful piece in the game! Sacrificing your queen isn't all that great an idea when you're actually playing chess. When you don't have her flexibility and strength on the board, you usually lose."

Um. Enjoy that little lecture, Caroline.

"Is that because men always lose when the women leave?" As the only female in the room, Caroline felt she could go there without much worry. Demonstrating her point would be easy enough.

"It's because women are stronger than most men or women give them credit for," Bobby said seriously.

"You are an excellent kiss ass," Caroline replied. "I bet you hear that a lot, though. Not that you're wrong. Men are totally weak. For example, flash a little skin and it's all over."

Ooh, something else she was excellent at demonstrating!

"I'm not trying to!" he protested, frowning a little. "And I didn't mean like that. Though, you're probably right too." As last week confirmed. Sigh.

"I'm always right," she smirked, checking to see if he'd just go along with her or not like the mean girl she could be.

Bobby frowned, torn between agreeing and making a face. "Maybe not always. Especially not about chess."

Or Student Council.

"Chess. Seriously, do people our age play this? It seems like such an old man in the park in old movies sort of game." That included the old dudes who were hot for each other in the mutant movies.

They were hot for each other when they were young dude too.

"I play it!" Bobby pointed out. "Dr. Benedict taught me how cause Mom and Jack wouldn't play with me anymore."

"Because you always win?" Caroline figured. "So it's old men and...you. You're what, thirteen?" Look, it was a decent guess given what she knew of him.

"I'm fifteen!" he protested, frowning at her. "Well, I will be in three weeks. And I bet a lot of kids here play. And there are world champions who are teenagers!"

He was still scowling. "...you thought I was thirteen?"

Oops? So maybe she wasn't as good at guessing ages as she'd thought.

"To my credit I was only a year off!"

"Two years!" he argued. "ANd there's a big difference from 13 to...older."

"Uh huh, except for how young and old seem to go together if you believe Hallmark commercials," Caroline told him. "That must be why we're friends." Because that was clearly a massive age difference.

Bobby made a face at her. "I don't think we should believe things made to sell greeting cards."

"Does that mean you're all anti-greeting cards now?" Obviously she'd have to make a special effort to send him some really inappropriate ones for his birthday.

"I'm not anti-them," he pondered. Being a teenage boy and all, he hadn't ever really thought about them. "But why can't you just say what's on the card instead of buying a card? It seems silly."

"Because sometimes the card can say it better," she suggested. "I mean, I know I talk a lot, but sometimes I don't have any clue what it is I'm supposed to be saying, especially in an emotionally heightened situation." Like when idiot boys ask her how she feels about them, ugh.

Bobby was...not even a little amused at Caroline's comment. Really. Totally disregard the starting of a smile there. It was a false smile.

"Yeah, but are you going to say 'hang on, I have to go buy a card?"

What? "No. Oh my God, you argue everything," she realized suddenly. "Seriously Bobby, you're lucky you're cute or I'd be questioning Jack on how he let you survive so long."

"No I don't!" he argued then looked sheepish. "I mean, I don't mean to. Um." Seriously, this was hard when she was right. "I don't think Jack thinks I'm cute. That'd be weird."

Aesthetics of Badassery | Monday - 1st Period

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