BASIC STRATEGY, MONDAY, PERIOD 4

[halfman-lion.livejournal.com]

Tyrion had dragged himself back to his apartment for long enough to bathe and put on vaguely Medieval normal clothes, but he couldn't do much about the circles under his eyes.

"I spent the night with a broken neck and gunshot wounds at the bottom of an inexplicable stairwell in the park," he greeted the students, once they were assembled. "I spent the day before that up a tree shooting at people. These are not situations I ever expected to find myself in. As such, I've postponed my planned lecture to next week."

A pause. "Dolf, Lucrezia, and Tony." Oh, Gods, he couldn't look at them if they were even there. "If you wish, you're excused for the day with full marks."

It was the least he could do after having tried to kill his students, or let them hire him for an assassin.

He paced a few steps, then: "The rest of you, write a two-part essay. In the first part, if you feel your weekend was worse than mine, tell me about it. If you were unscathed, tell me how you managed that. Either way, use the second part to tell me what you'd do if you woke up one morning and realized you'd spent the last two days trying to kill people -- and not even done a very good job of it. When you're done writing, you may leave or quietly study at your desks."

And then he was going to sit back at his desk, rest his head in his arms, and try to think his way to a happy place. Not the one full of naked girls, the other one. The peaceful one, where everything was okay.

Comments

Sign In [9/12]

[halfman-lion.livejournal.com]

Like you're grateful SoW is over.

Re: Sign In [9/12]

[notmyownage]

Claudia Donovan

General Class Stuff [9/12]

[halfman-lion.livejournal.com]

Like the teacher's using the class to ramble about his weekend.

Re: General Class Stuff [9/12]

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Between all the running around and plotting and skullduggery, and not having any caffiene, Kenzi was going to be just trying to stay awake. Although it was kind of awful and awesome that Prof. Lannister had been an assassin, and she didn't run into him.

Re: General Class Stuff [9/12]

[willbethenight.livejournal.com]

Bruce understood the choice of lecture. He wouldn't have done it himself, but his weekend involved crazy sex and attempts on his life. Probably not appropriate for the class topic anyway.

Well, maybe the whole surviving attempts on his life thing would have made sense. But not the crazy sex.

Re: General Class Stuff [9/12]

[batwaffles.livejournal.com]

Stephanie had the weirdest feeling she should be getting used to things like this -- namely, a huge complicated series of events taking place and then getting wiped from existence like they never happened, except for in people's memories.

She didn't really want to, but she had the feeling, and that contributed to the severely confused look on her face.

You know, that and the whole thing with her teacher shooting her boyfriend even if he hadn't been at the time and oh god she wasn't drawing up that chart.

Re: General Class Stuff [9/12]

[swordsandsoccer.livejournal.com]

Dolf was going to sit here, slump in his chair, and use the free out to do nothing. Nana had been... clingy in the morning. Incredibly clingy. He'd barely managed to lock her in the room before fleeing back to class, and he had a feeling he'd come out of this week covered in Saint Bernard hair.

And he didn't even like dogs.

Re: General Class Stuff [9/12]

[godgavemecable.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Toby was just going to sit here and sulk about not having any shoes again. Damnit. At least he had socks, though. That was a small comfort.

Re: General Class Stuff [9/12]

[holy-daughter.livejournal.com]

Lucrezia was pale, but chose not to exercise the option to flee. She was a Borgia.

She could not, however, meet her teacher's gaze. Nor could she glance to see if Bruce was unwell from the poison (poison) her deranged self had administered.

Essays [9/12]

[halfman-lion.livejournal.com]

Two questions:

1. What happened to you this weekend?
1a. If nothing happened, why do you think that was?

2. You wake up and remember spending the last two days trying to kill people. However, you also remember that most of them somehow got away. How do you feel about it, and what do you do?

Re: Essays [9/12]

[notmyownage]

Claudia did her best to hide her smirk at Tyrion's reaction to his first crazy Fandom weekend. She chewed on the end of her pencil while pondering what she wanted to write -- then spat wood shavings and graphite and sighed.

Congratulations, sir, you've survived your first crazy Fandom event. At least you didn't end up with sharp pointy teeth out of the bargain.

The important thing to remember is that pretty much everyone else on the island has experienced the same or worse, and that no one from home ever needs to know.

Unless you end up with weirdly pointy teeth.

Yeah, she wasn't over the teeth thing.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Well, crap.

1. I killed a guy, I tried to break up a wedding, I think I seduced a priest? I stole shit (that's not new), I had a stupid accent but awesome clothes. There was some mocking and flirting in there. I might have been a former spy, or a former hooker, it's not real clear.

So basically, it was kind of awesome. Especially since it wasn't real. Except for the stupid accent.

2. I'd be really sad my aim was so bad. Also, hope they deserved it.

As for what she'd do about it, she had no frickin' clue.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[willbethenight.livejournal.com]

1. On Saturday, I navigated a complex web of lies and deception that saw me threatened by an ex-wife, finding a current wife pregnant by some sort of alien or demonic entity, then marrying a former wife who had previously tried to murder me. On Sunday, the third wife tried to poison me, a grown child from my first marriage shot and stabbed me, and the second wife strangled me. Then I was in a diamond mine minutes before somebody tried to blow it up.

It was a bizarre experience, even compared to other bouts of strangeness I've been through in Fandom.

2. I'd feel terrible. And I don't know. I can't elaborate more than that.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[batwaffles.livejournal.com]

This was going to be awwwwwwwwwwwwwkward.

1. Well, apparently I was dead, and then I wasn't, or maybe I'd just faked my death all along. I'm not exactly clear on the details. And then I showed up at my ex-husband's wedding to object, and we cried in each other's arms, and things are a little fuzzy there except for the part where you killed him.

I'm not really holding that against you though.

Mostly because I'm too confused to spare the brainpower for it, admittedly.

2. I know I'd feel horrible about it, but relieved for the ones who got away. I guess it would depend on whether the ones who didn't get away deserved it.

If they did, I think I'd be okay with that. I think.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[inaskinnyway.livejournal.com]

1. My weekend seems to have been much different than yours was. I stayed in my room and did my homework. My weekend was perhaps not as exciting as others', but I think I'm a more stable person because of it. I'm not sure why it happened, but there is a saying about a gift horse I choose to reference here, and I will stick with that.

2. I can only answer this question rhetorically, but I think I would be glad that my lacking skills meant I don't have to have guilt about killing anyone. Call me an optimist.

No one ever would call her that, no.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[godgavemecable.livejournal.com]

1. I spent Saturday mysteriously blacking out, making plans to run away back to Canada with my best friend (and he so, so was not giving details about the bizarre bromance he seemed to have going on with Sam, because... awkward) and finally fell into a coma after being told I had an incurable brain tumor. Sunday, I was fine and went to a wedding, where Kenzi told me she'd avenged my brain tumor by killing someone.

2. I think I'd be glad that my shooting skills were apparently abysmal. As for what I'd do about it- apologise for trying to kill them, obviously.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[withasword.livejournal.com]

1. I spent the weekend thinking I was an ex-internet porn star and crying about it because someone was using this information to blackmail me.

2. Practice more.

Also feel incredibly guilty if they had done nothing wrong. That part was not going on paper.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[harpy-daughter.livejournal.com]

It wasn't that Surreal's weekend had been bad, it just hadn't been particularly good either.

1. I was the personal assistant/bodyguard/stage dancer for a singer with all the sense of a flea and the sexual appetites of a rabbit in breeding season. I slept with him and didn't even get paid.

Yes, she was annoyed about the lack of her fee, not the sex. It had been decent, but Surreal hadn't survived this long by giving out pity-sex.

2. Wonder what the Hell was wrong with me that I failed, and count all my knives to make sure I'm not missing any.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[bigshoestofill.livejournal.com]

Bart spent about five minutes writing a long essay about his trip through time which caused him to lose two weeks. It was long and complicated and involved a treadmill (don't ask). There were arrows and diagrams and charts. He explained the daring heroics and drama. It was truly an epic to behold.

He sat there looking at his work, proud of his writing, then remembered what Wally had said about causality and foreknowledge, sighed and crumpled up the paper.

Dejectedly, he started writing on a new piece of paper, "I had a quiet weekend at home with my family."

He then went on to write about the time he was taken over by Cobalt Blue and almost killed his entire family. Good times.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[dontvotemeout]

Most of Jason's essay was taken up by complaining about being a hooker and getting taken in by the pony, of all creatures, and how he hated everything in the world today.

As for number 2, he admitted that he'd probably be kind of disappointed that he hadn't been a better shot. It seemed like the right answer.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[holy-daughter.livejournal.com]

Lucrezia bit her lip, but chose to be honest.

1. I was a murderess this weekend. I married men, then poisoned them.

2. From a moral standpoint, I should hope that I would pray to God that I never follow that path myself.

If we are talking straightforward logic, I would check my poison supply. I have heard that it is a reliable method, and such a high degree of error might hint at tampering.

Re: Essays [9/12]

[squire-hand.livejournal.com]

1. I handwavily spent the weekend behind the scenes as a stunt man. A tumbler. All of the actors decided to tumble themselves, however, so I did nothing.

2. I do not speak of it, and turn to copious amounts of booze.

Talk to Kate [9/12]

[halfman-lion.livejournal.com]

Once she has pinged!

Re: Talk to Kate [9/12]

[withasword.livejournal.com]

It was only great restraint and the realisation that people had done worse this past weekend that was stopping Kate from repeatedly smacking her head against her desk today.

She would probably talk to people if necessary.

Talk to Tyrion [9/12]

[halfman-lion.livejournal.com]

Who will be more blase about Fandom weird next time.

Re: Talk to Tyrion [9/12]

[withasword.livejournal.com]

"I think I was supposed to try and keep you alive on weekends like this." Kate had failed spectacularly through no real fault of her own, but at least it appeared no real harm had come of it.

OOC [9/12]

[halfman-lion.livejournal.com]

I so love SOW, awkward aftermath included.

Re: OOC [9/12]

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

You are the wiiiiiind beneath my wiiiiiiiiings!