fandomhigh | Don't Be Evil [Friday, Second Period]

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don't be evil

Don't Be Evil [Friday, Second Period]

Oz was exceedingly chipper as he waited for his class to finish filing into the classrooom. It was a brand new semester, with a brand new crop of fresh young minds to ~~warp~~ ~~scar~~ mould. Once the bell rang, he turned the electronic display at the front of class on.

"Don't be evil," he read out. "Both the name and the aim of the class. Funny that. And while initially it may seem simple enough, it turns out that for some people, or companies even, not being evil is really, really hard, so hard in fact that they need to make it their motto. Hopefully none of you are that far gone yet, since that'd really ruin my pass rate, and your chances of leading happy, productive lives." And that would be terrible.

"But first week things first though, I see some familiar faces but also new ones and it's not like I have my own personal hacker to break into your records and help me keep track that way." Not on the island at least. "Which means it's introduction time. Name, class, a useful skill, and a time you chose not to be evil. For example, I'm Oz, your teacher, that's classified, and that one's even more classified. Now your turn, you first, sparky."

"I'm also looking for a TA, anyone who's interested just fill in the application form, and I'll get back to you by next class."

[OCD up]

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Name, class, a useful skill, and a time you didn't do evil.

"Sam LaCroix, senior," he started while his mind went back and forth on what to give as a useful skill. He could go vague like always or open up a little. Decisions, decisions.

"You need a supremely greasy hamburger? I can help you out with that," he said, going with the sarcastic answer instead of anything else. "Just don't expect me to eat it. Vegetarian. And I think I resisted doing evil every time some customer yells in my face about their food. I resisted dropped that food on the floor and stepping on it. I'm a saint."

Sort of. Not really.

This mildly curious glance was not for the fast food expertise, no. It was for being a vegetarian.

Different worlds, yadda yadda, she knew all that now and besides, he'd claimed to be normal, but she couldn't help wondering. She'd heard vegans were powerful and she wondered if that extended to vegetarians too. Hmm.

His claims of normalcy were lies but he was probably powerful in ways she wouldn't even begin to imagine and it had nothing to do with not eating meat. Still, he caught her glance and returned it with some tempered interest.

Maybe she just liked the thought of fast food jockeys. Well, ex fast food jockeys. He'd left that life behind.

Re: Introductions - DBE [01]

whenshewasnice - 2011-09-02 14:51 (UTC) - Expand

"I'm given to understand that's very common impulse in the service industry." Oz always made sure to be nice to people who prepared his food for that very reason.

"From what my coworkers tell me, you're not wrong." Sam tended to be nice to other people at fast food joints for that same reason. He knew what they went through.

"Natalie Adams, junior, and I can type pretty fast." It was a mundane skill, and she'd picked that one on purpose, yeah. She could also kick really high, but that wasn't a skill she thought to be very useful in her life in general. "I don't think I've ever done evil, so... the time last week when I didn't lie to my roommate and tell her I'm allergic to cats or something so she couldn't have had her cat come live with us."

Oz nodded. "Very good, lying for your own comfort can be evil." Not always but often enough for Oz's purposes.

"I'm Cassel and I'm a senior," he started. "I've got a pretty good head for figures and I'm good at bookkeeping. And I didn't do evil when I let my roommate do what she wanted to our room without complaining."

"Smoothing the cohabitation edges, excellent work there."

"Kate, I'm a junior, and I can make wards... Magical fences." In case that needed any clarification. "I was not evil when I had breakfast this morning and left the last of the milk for the next person."

Oz grinned and clapped his hands together. "Since I'm assuming the milk hadn't turned, good job!"

"Well, gee whiz," said Butters, looking exceptionally innocent today...or at least trying to, but it seemed to make him be a little more nervous than usual, "why, I'm just Butters Stotch, and I'm from South Park, Colorado. I'm real good at arts and crafts and building stuff, and I try to not do evil every day, but I think I make real big strides by not drinking lots of booze, smoking pot, or having sex with wonton women or nubile boys. Those're the three golden rules to stayin' on the right track to counteractin' all the stuff that God made wrong in me. That, an' always keepin' an organized pantry an' doin' my homework."

"Substance abuse is bad," Oz agreed. "But provided everyone involved is capable of informed consent, there's nothing particularly evil in sex with women or men, or both as the case may be."

"Warren Worthington, and I'm a senior," Warren shared, his wings (still too brightly colored) spreading just slightly before he pressed on. "Flying, I'd say, is a pretty useful skill, but I'm not half bad with money, either. And as tempting as it is sometimes, I haven't actually grabbed anyone and dropped them into the duck pond from twenty feet up, yet."

Not sharing how he'd refrained from eating his girlfriend while he was a grey alien monster was pretty not evil, too, considering there was at least one new student in the room.

"Good, good, concern for others' safety, very non-evil. You could probably cater to the extreme sports crowd if you dropped them onto a crash pad, though."

"Peter Wiggin," Peter supplied, smoothly, "Sophomore. I'm a pretty damn good writer, and I never reported my old roommate for drug abuse."

"Not making a false report that would have gotten you the room to yourself." Even if that wasn't the case, Oz was going to parse it that way just so they all had plausible deniability. "Also not evil."

"Sam Puckett, Junior. I have a lot of talents." He probably wanted something more specific, though. She rolled her eyes as only a teenager could. "Including building a snare trap large enough to catch Bigfoot. And, uh. . . ." She thought. And thought again. And then some more. She wasn't super good at choosing not to be evil. That's what she was friends with Carly for. "I haven't publically humiliated Freddie in weeks." That counted, right?

It did for Oz's purposes! "Keep at it, and soon you'll be able to say you haven't done it in months."

"I don't know if I can make it that long, man. I'm twitchy already."

Re: Introductions - DBE [01]

thefearwasreal - 2011-09-03 04:18 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Introductions - DBE [01]

hurtingzeebo - 2011-09-03 04:19 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Introductions - DBE [01]

thefearwasreal - 2011-09-03 04:22 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Introductions - DBE [01]

hurtingzeebo - 2011-09-03 04:27 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Introductions - DBE [01]

thefearwasreal - 2011-09-03 04:31 (UTC) - Expand

"Elle Bishop, senior, I can produce electricity, and... I wasn't evil when I helped rescue a friend from something bad that'd happened to her."

"That is in fact, the opposite of evil, good job, Elle."

"I'm Jason Todd, I'm a junior, I can move really fast--not like, super speed or anything, but I'm good at escaping from people chasing after me--and I once met the guy who killed my dad, and I could have killed him, but I didn't," he said. That probably counted as not being evil, at least.

"Not going for revenge is a hard choice, and also the right one." If Oz had had a pack of gold star stickers handy, Jason would have gotten one, or even two.

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