fandomhigh | Cupcake War Crimes, Week 4 (Tuesday, Period 1)

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cupcake war crimes

Cupcake War Crimes, Week 4 (Tuesday, Period 1)

Once again the Home Ec room looked like itself. The two aliens up front also looked like themselves.

"Welcome back," Stark said. "Again. I hope you’re all yourselves." He hadn’t been anyone, or anywhere, else this weekend but he was aware that the island had done something odd yet again.

"For you newer kids, this kind of thing has been happening in Fandom forever," Anders added helpfully. Even though it had usually skipped him. "Sorry to tell you, though, it usually doesn't last long enough to get you out of classes."

"In honor of this, er, occasion, we’ve brought some cupcake examples today that aren’t really themselves. Well, they are. Themselves. But they are pretending to be something else." Stark’s statement wasn’t entirely accurate, but it was close enough.

Well, that sounded incredibly ominous, didn't it? So Anders was quick to add, "And ones that actually are what they look like. Or claim to be." One of their bad examples was particularly, in his opinion, evil.

"The problem," Stark said, frowning, "is that they look the same. The ones that are what they should be and the ones pretending to be what they should be."

"And there isn't really a good way to tell just by looking," Anders added with a frown. "So think about that for a little while before we get to baking for the day. What's your best chance at identifying the tricky cupcakes? Any powers you have that would help? Just your brains? Is there a way you can figure that out without actually tasting them?"

It was a complicated answer, most likely, so he amended, "This is one of those 'no one right answer' questions."

Of course, you could always try asking your alien instructors. They weren’t likely to lead you astray. They took their cupcakes far too seriously for that. And they just weren’t that mean.

Nor were they mean enough to turn you loose on the evil ninja camouflage cupcakes without telling you what was in them. Anders uncovered what was now well established as The Bad Cupcake Tray with a flourish. "These ~~#5 in the gallery, stupid inability to link directly~~ claim to be red velvet cupcakes. They look like ‘em, don’t they? Well, they’re actually beets." He paused for a moment, because a moment was necessary to appreciate the true horror there.

"And there are these," Stark added, pointing to what looked like chocolate cupcakes next to the red ones. "They look like chocolate. Because they are chocolate. But not just chocolate. These are full of garlic. And hazardous to the health of certain vampires." He looked around, suddenly slightly worried. "None of you are vampires, are you?"

"If you are the kind of vampire who can’t deal with garlic, definitely don’t eat those," Anders blurted out emphatically.

"Please!" Stark added. He hadn’t been to the clinic in years and didn’t particularly want to go back escorting an accidentally poisoned-by-cupcake student. "Now, we also brought you some real red velvet cupcakes. And real chocolate ones." He uncovered the Good Tray to illustrate, and perhaps to gaze longingly at a chocolate cupcake. They were his favorites, after all.

"It’s okay, man, I’ll save you a few," Anders told him in an undertone. "Oh, yeah. And the winner from last week is Jacob Black. Congrats, dude."

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Like your cupcake belongs in another universe!

Lion-o

Sam Puckett

Nobody Owens

Raven

Shane Gooseman

Jacob Black

Princess Ariel

Juliet Darling

Chuck Bartowski

Caroline Forbes

Rilla Blythe

Noah Puckerman

Lindsay Weir

How would you try and sniff out the impostor cupcakes? And try a cupcake. Remember, you were warned.

There was an audible gasp from Lion-o at the thought of beets in cupcakes. It was followed by another, louder gasp at the idea of garlic in chocolate cupcakes. Lion-o just could not understand why anyone would deface a cupcake in such a manner.

Sam was of the "the best way to know it is to test it" camp, and continued to not understand the teachers' aversions to tasting things.

"The garlic one I'm thinking you could probably smell," she pointed out. "But it's not like it'd kill you to try tasting a bit of one. Or, you know, if it did, that's more cupcakes for the rest of us."

Beware her priorities. Beware.

Bod was honestly wondering if maybe he shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Those cupcakes looked rather good and maybe the ingredients within wouldn't change that too much.

This line of thinking was much easier than dwelling on the death of his friend and the fact that his girlfriend had fled the island, only leaving a voicemail in her wake.

Raven didn't mind the beets much, but the garlic, while not an ingredient she disliked, did not belong in a cupcake, at least not with chocolate wtf.

"Hey," said Ariel with a shrug, happily eating a garlic cupcake. "Just as long as no one tries to trick me into eating a seafood cupcake, I'm a happy cupcake camper."

Pause.

"Hey, do you think anyone's ever tried deep frying a cupcake before?"

Stark thought about that for a moment. "Don't know. Probably. You can get everything deep-fried, can't you? But it's a good idea. I'll make Anders try it."

Ariel grinned a little, nodding her head. "I think I'll give it a try, too, myself. I'm on a quest to see what I can deep fry. Hey, if I pull it off, can I get extra credit?"

"You can if you share," Stark said after a brief consideration. "Especially if there is chocolate involved."

"Sharing," said Ariel, lifting one finger to counter before adding the second one. "Chocolate. Check! You got it."

As a teacher, Stark was very easy to bribe.

"I look forward to it," he said with a tiny grin.

Go ahead and make garlic or beet cupcakes, but remember, the aliens are judging you. A lot.

Sam came from a world where spaghetti tacos were prize winning taste sensations. Of course she was going to try the "bad" ingredients.

She did mix it up a bit. Chocolate and beet, for instance, and garlic-red-velvet.

Bod decided to try out something a little different this week. He'd found a recipe for baked bean and tomato cupcakes awhile back at the diner and decided to go with that. He didn't think anyone would want to eat the cupcakes especially when he pulled out the beans to get baking but he wanted to switch things up a bit.

The garlic didn't belong in cupcakes, but Raven decided to try chili powder with dark chocolate, since she'd seen that combination in chocolate bars.

She still wasn't sure when a cupcake wasn't a cupcake and was a muffin instead.

Goose decided to combine both the garlic and beet and mix it in with chocolate, he was curious to find out what the end result would be.

Juliet was curious and not especially hungry, so she went for broke: Beet cupcakes with garlic frosting.

She'd leave them for the birds, or something.

Rilla privately believed that anything with a horseradish frosting had a special corner of Hell reserved for it, though she'd have to check with Reverend Meredith to be absolutely certain.

Her cupcake was carrot, with maple cream cheese frosting.

Still judging you. Or at least your baking.

If you're making a scary cupcake, Stark mostly just thinks you're misguided. Really. The judgement won't be too harsh.

Anders wasn't really judging you, either.

He'd been party to an incident involving exploding glittery cupcakes in the common room once, so . . . yeah.

It should not be this easy to find this many frightening cupcake recipes. And yet.

I MEAN, WE HAVE A WHOLE GDOC FULL.

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Cupcake War Crimes, Week 4 (Tuesday, Period 1)

Sign In [CWC, 6/7]

Re: Sign In [CWC, 6/7]

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Re: Sign In [CWC, 6/7]

Re: Sign In [CWC, 6/7]

Listen to/discuss the “lecture” [CWC, 6/7]

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Re: Listen to/discuss the “lecture” [CWC, 6/7]

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Re: Listen to/discuss the “lecture” [CWC, 6/7]

Re: Listen to/discuss the “lecture” [CWC, 6/7]

Re: Listen to/discuss the “lecture” [CWC, 6/7]

Bake [CWC 6/7]

Re: Bake [CWC 6/7]

Re: Bake [CWC 6/7]

Re: Bake [CWC 6/7]

Re: Bake [CWC 6/7]

Re: Bake [CWC 6/7]

Re: Bake [CWC 6/7]

Talk to the Teachers! [CWC 6/7]

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Re: Talk to the Teachers! [CWC 6/7]

OOC [CWC 6/7]